On the Way Home

If We Build It . . .

2012-01-31T02:15:00.000-08:00

. . . we'll figure out what to do with it. I've always used this line when referring to life at Champlain College, where we all too often equate the word "nimble" with the academic equivalent of running with scissors. That said, Champlain has nothing on the UAE. Let me slide in a picture in the midst of a very quick posting. I was looking at pictures from my ill-fated bike ride the other night and I came across this one. One of my strengths (or weaknesses) is that I often pick up on (or fabricate) deeper meaning behind seemingly insignificant events or objects. So, a classic Scudder statement would be, "this is clearly a microcosm of . . ." or "this so clearly represents . . ." or "this is so completely symbolic of . . ." - at which point I normally throw in a quote from Marcus Aurelius and off we go. Now, as Marcus reminds us, "The secret of all victory lies in the organization of the non-obvious." So maybe my strength lies in my ability to organize the non-obvious (although I clearly pale in comparison to my friend Cinse - and you should read her blog, which can be accessed at the bottom right of this one). Maybe I'm digging deeper or just organizing the non-obvious. Anyway, this picture speaks to life in the UAE. On my bike ride I was really taken back by how amazingly manicured everything was, including roads that were going no place. In this picture we have a very carefully landscaped path that just ends. Now, maybe this is part of a much bigger plan that will all come together in the fullness of time - or maybe it is just designed to sit there and look pretty until someone figures out what to do next.

Why Me Laugh?

2012-01-30T21:47:00.000-08:00

I was cleaning up my files - as with all professors, I'll do anything in place of grading - and came across this bizarre picture from right outside Red Square in Moscow. Why it has popped up into my consciousness two years late is beyond me. Maybe it's enough that it is a funny photo - I especially love how the Easter Bunny is using Spongebob Squarepants as a crutch. Or maybe it has to do with a lot of thinking I've been doing lately about the McDonaldization of the world. The very fact that Homer Simpson, the Easter Bunny and Spongebob Squarepants are flouncing around Red Square speaks to the continuing domination of American pop culture. I spent the entire semester torturing my poor students with variations of the same question: who are you? That is, what does it mean to be an Emirati? In your mad, headlong rush into modernity and western culture what do you have left? In an effort to spark a debate/argument I dismiss them as a nation of mall walkers and suggest that they're already the 51st state (which holding open the option that the US is actually the 8th emirate). If the true US religion is consumerism, which I always tell them, have they already converted? The girls do a pretty spirited job defending themselves, which, of course, makes me very happy because that was the point in the first place. I will say this for the Emiratis - they have done a better job at drawing a line than we Americans have. Life here is an amazing balancing act between the deeply traditional and the ultra-modern, and for all of their fascination with the glossy and new, they are also very protective of their culture (even if they struggle to define it clearly) and especially their faith - while we Americans sold everything out a long time ago.

This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things

2012-01-28T21:11:00.000-08:00

OK, so I borrowed that line from Archer. Here is a picture of the bike I rented on Thursday evening - well, the first bike I rented Thursday evening. Back in Vermont I ride my bike almost every day when the weather allows, and I've been meaning to get in a bike ride here for months. Yas Island is a great place for riding a bike because it is flat and, at least at this point, quiet and also possesses some nice bike paths. Renting a bike is easy because the Crowne Plaza, the posh hotel which is partnered with the more pedestrian Staybridge (or Hellbridge, as the Remnants call is - they still haven't forgiven me for moving out), rents bikes, and all one has to do is tell someone at the Staybridge to contact the Crowne Plaza, and, huzzah, a bike appears. After work on Thursday I decided it was finally time to get in a ride. It had been a long week and I wanted to get in some exercise which didn't include the elliptical machine at the Crowne Plaza fitness centre. Plus, the weather right now is perfect - it might be the middle of winter here, and people are bundling up and complaining about the cold, but it is actually lovely (think eary fall in Vermont, except a tad warmer). The only problem with my bike ride was that it had to be delayed because my first rental bike blew up, and I'm not exaggerating much. I hadn't gone more than fifty meters and during my first gear change the entire gear mechanism fell off the bike (here's the photographic evidence). As anyone knows I am hard on bikes, highlighted by the time I buried my bike (and face) into the railing on the Colchester bike path and the still inexplicable two week stretch last year when I had six flat tires. That said, even by my high standards the explosion of the gear mechanism was impressive. I dragged the tattered remnants of my bike experiment back to the hotel and they happily brought me a new one, while also staring in disbelief at the damage. Not to be denied, I took off on what proved to be a wonderful ride, but more on that later.

McTravel

2012-01-26T02:00:00.000-08:00

As anyone who has had the misfortune to travel with me knows, one of my travel peculiarities is to stop at a McDonald's restaurant once on every trip. It's not as if I like McDonald's - I'm not a big fan of them, and I truly hate the McDonaldization of the world (another word which I which I would have coined). It's almost a perverse joy, because I almost never go to McDonald's back in the States. I want to see if a Big Mac tastes the same every place in the world, which it essentially does - although the meat in foreign Big Macs is sometimes even dodgier than back home. Plus, I want to see if they cost the same, which they always do, whether you are paying in euros or forints or lira or dihrams or dinar or yuan. However, the $4.50 that you are laying out for a Big Mac in the US is a very different $4.50 in equivalent yuan that you are paying in China; meaning that instead of a convenient throw-away meal on the run that you are wolfing down in the US, you are making a status statement in other parts of the world (you can afford to pay that $4.50 equivalent in yuan). One of my Hungarian friends told me that they were really excited when McDonald's showed up in Budapest because it showed that they had arrived on the world market (and because McDonald's had cleaner restrooms). One of the other reasons to eat at McDonald's is to try their usual clumsy attempts to regional dishes. Here's a picture of a McIberica, which I picked up at the Madrid Airport on the way back from Portugal. It has ham on top because, well, it's just what the Spanish do (check out my earlier posting about the Museum of Ham). Obviously, the McIberica would not be a big seller in the Islamic world, where you have to settle for the McArabiya (and let's not even get into the chicken equivalents at Indian McDonald's).

Word Coinage: Remasculate

2012-01-26T01:36:00.000-08:00

Several years ago I was talking to my friend Colin and I used the word exoticize, as in, if I can remember correctly, "we always tend to exoticize other people's lives." Colin responded that he thought I had made up a new word. I told him that I couldn't have made up the word because he knew what I meant, but he argued that he knew because the word made so much sense, and not because he had heard it before. Anyway, on the way back to my office I checked out a couple of the dictionaries in the library at Champlain and couldn't find the word, and so I managed to half-convince myself that I had, in fact, made up the word. As it turns out I didn't make up the word because I later found it in the Oxford English Dictionary, so it was just one of those words that the more brilliant British use, and which I had probably read in a Martin Amis or Julian Barnes novel. It did get me thinking about making up words and how one gets credited with them - as in, you look up a word in the dictionary and after the definition they cite some source. I think I missed my chance with douche baggery, which I started using around three years ago - as in accusing some student of some immeasurable feat of douche baggery. However, I later saw many people use it and I realized that I had been plundered and not given the appropriate credit. However, I have no one to blame but myself. So, with that in mind, I'm going to lay claim to the word remasculate, which I used the other day in conversation. My definition of it is some gesture that a man's girlfriend or wife does to make up for something that they had done earlier to emasculate him. It's not the same as simply doing something nice to make up hurting someone's feelings, but rather an act which makes the man seem or feel more masculine. For example, she might have earlier, and within earshot of his or her friends, told the man not to bother carrying something (with the perception being - or at least the man's bruised ego-inspired perception being - that it should be carried by someone younger or stronger). Later she will make up for it, either consciously or unconsciously, by praising, again within earshot or his or her friends, her man's strength. Thus, she has remasculated him. There, I have officially laid claim to the word - or at least until I get the official letter from the solicitors of Amis or Barnes that they have been using the word for years and expect to be reimbursed.

Beautiful

2012-01-25T19:20:00.000-08:00

Yesterday morning I was walking into breakfast here at the Staybridge when I just about bumped into an elderly Arabic man of uncertain nationality who was walking around with a little girl that I assume was his granddaughter. He smiles at me quite brilliantly and asks, "are you Saudi?" Now, I was just wearing a blue button-down shirt, jeans and sandals, so I didn't necessarily look the part. I was so taken back (and it rather difficult to silence me completely) that I just smiled back. He then said, "you are beautiful," before walking off happily with the little girl. Not since I was flying out of Mumbai and an Indian stewardess stopped me as I was boarding to plane to tell me that I was "so very handsome" have I been so certain that I had entered another dimension. Or it could just be a case where my hearing is even worse than I think. Who knows what he actually said or what he actually meant to say. Maybe the best answer is the one my great friend Andy proposed - that he actually said, "you are juvenile." My perceptive, and obviously kind, friend Cinse said that maybe he just saw some essential goodness in my nature and was recognizing that. I like that answer, although whenever I think of someone seeing the true me I imagine it ending up like the devils in the coffee shop complaining about Frank Black seeing their true essence in the "Somehow Satan Got Behind Me" episode of Millennium.

A Cozy Meal in Istanbul

2012-01-24T02:37:00.000-08:00

It is probably quite telling that I include so many posts about eating. Here's just a quick posting, mainly, I suspect, to distract me from grading final exams. Here are three pictures of a wonderful little meal that I had at the Cozy Cafe in Istanbul, right around the corner from the Hagia Sophia (about three doors down from Starbucks). It was such a great meal that I went there a couple times. Great food and wonderful, friendly service - everyone spoke impeccable English and could not have been friendlier. I just asked them, "what do you think I should eat?", and they took that as a personal challenge.

I especially liked the beans, which look really plain, but which were fantastic. Apparently it's a staple dish both in Turkey and in Greece. It was advertised as kidney beans, but I believe it was butter beans (as my good friend Kelly Thomas observed). It was just butter beans cooked in olive oil, garlic and thyme. Combine it with Efe, a nice Turkish beer, and you have a lovely meal.

The Shrine

2012-01-23T03:15:00.000-08:00

One of the most pleasant experiences of my wonderful three week stay back in Vermont was walking into my office and discovering that it had been turned into a shrine by my office-mates, Bob and Craig. They had not told me a thing about it, so it was quite the pleasant surprise. My desk and books were covered in plastic and various items strewn around in voodoo fashion, all designed to assure that I return to them and not stay permanently in the UAE.

I was truly touched. I think they miss me as much as I miss them.

Bilbo's Car

2012-01-22T09:05:00.000-08:00

Finally, five months into the Abu Dhabi experience, I have a rental car. Technically, I suppose, I could have rented one earlier, but I was waiting until I had all forms filled out. So, once I squared away my Emirati ID card (more on that epic adventure later) and my driver's license, I finally felt empowered to go rent a car from Hertz at the airport (which is only around ten minutes away). While several of my friends here have cars, I grew tired of mooching rides off them and wanted more freedom. So, I popped over and rented a Toyoto Yaris, which is a little hobbit car. However, they are pretty peppy and pretty popular. I've had to memorize the license plate because so many people own or rent a white Yaris. I pleased with the nice woman at the counter for a blue or red one, but they are very rare. So, here it is. I suppose it's not that big of a deal, but if you factor in the fact that I haven't really owned a car in over two and a half years I'm oddly happy to have my little Yaris. Now I only have to avoid getting creamed. The UAE, besides being number one in the world in per capita carbon footprint, is also number one in crashes per capita. The Emiratis, bless their souls, are just really crazy drivers. I heard this morning, and I find this to be completely believeable, that last year when they had a big rain there were 6500 wrecks in one morning in Abu Dhabi. Yikes. Now, I don't really think the numbers make any sense, but the Emiratis do drive like bats out of hell so anything is possible. There was a story in the paper recently wherein the government came to realize that their yearly amnesty of traffic tickets was actually a bad idea because the drivers knew that there was going to be an amnesty so they just drove all the faster. You rarely see police cars here, although heaven help you if you get pulled over, especially if you've been drinking. The Emirati authorities are not amused by drinking and driving and you will end up in jail immediately, which I actually support. Every infraction here is captured electronically and you don't find out about your tickets until you come in to renew your tags, and there are all sorts of stories about drivers who come in and discover that they owe thousands of dollars in fines. So, the adventure begins. The UAE will be the fourth foreign country where I've driven, following Canada, Oman and South Africa, and the first where I've acquired a new driver's license.

Rain, Sort Of

2012-01-21T03:54:00.000-08:00

Last night, 20 January, it sprinkled. I suppose that's not that big a deal, but it's the first rain, even a timid, unsure one, since I arrived in Abu Dhabi on 1 September. It's truly silly how happy I was to see it. It's no wonder the students will sometimes go outside and play in the rain. The UAE is one of the driest places on earth, and they champion, for the most part quite rightly, their efforts at water conservation and increasing efforts at ecological conservation. As most Emiratis, with a pained expression, can tell you, the UAE is the only country in the world that that is ahead of the US in regards to their per capita carbon footprint. They are starting to work on carbon neutral buildings and cities. That said, they also have several lush golf courses, including the Abu Dhabi course where Tiger Woods will be playing next week, which seem like a really bad idea considering that we are in the desert. I tweaked my students about it last week, and they responded that the golf courses will designed and built for westerners so it's not their fault, which is probably a good point. However, if you're turning yourself into a vacation destination then I guess you're stuck with providing what the vacationers want.

Lucky Dogs

2012-01-15T00:27:00.000-08:00

Recently I was sitting around watching college football with my great friend Mike Lange. Actually, we were sitting around wasting an entire New Year's Eve watching around ten hours of college football. I've never been a big New Year's Eve person so I was happy to do so. Plus, it was during the brief golden age of my college football pool dominance, before it all ended in tears. Anyway, being guys, we were generally talking nonsense. At one point Mike asked me where I would like to spend my time in the Witness Protection Program doing and where would I like to spend it. What a great question, and one that made me hold my questioning manhood cheap (to paraphrase Shakespeare). I'm normally the one who prides himself on asking questions like that, so I was shocked that I didn't think of it. My answer was easy and obvious (at least to anyone who knows me): selling Lucky Dogs in the French Quarter in New Orleans. This has been my retirement goal for some time now. Now, in the end we decided that this was not a good answer to this particular question because too many organized crime types pass through the French Quarter so I would be too easily discovered, and I had to move on to working at a video store in the Dakotas. Still, it didn't change my desire to spend my declining years (which actually began when I was around 27) selling Lucky Dogs. The obvious question is: why? First off, I love New Orleans and the French Quarter. Secondly, I love Lucky Dogs. Thirdly, I am more than a little bit like Ignatius O'Reilly from A Confederacy of Dunces. Finally, however, maybe I'm just tired (or it might be better to say, exhausted nye on to death) of making decisions. A life devoid of administrative, faculty and student tomfoolery - and where my biggest challenge in the course of a day related to breaking a $100 bill - sounds better and better. Here's a picture of a Luck Dogs salesman, snapped during the epic journey to Nawlins over last summer with Andy Burkhardt and Steve Wehmeyer. I have seen my future and it is one of bliss.

Hagia Sophia

2012-01-11T23:06:00.000-08:00

Like most men, I suppose, I rank things, which is different than making lists. Women make lists - men construct Top 10 lists. It probably relates to our fascination with sports, especially baseball, which are driven by standings. Following this logic, then, as participatory sports became more popular among young girls then women should have started constructing top 10 lists as well (but maybe this is actually all genetic). So ask any man a question like "What are you top five cars?" they would not hesitate for a moment, and could give you the list, and, more importantly, in order. It could be top five or ten cars in the world or that they had personally owned, but they would have a numerical list. It doesn't matter whether it is favorite professional athletes or teams or classes or best kisses, but they would have a list ready. Now, why am I starting a posting about Hagia Sophia with this odd preamble? As I walked into the Hagia Sophia in Istanbul I had one of those moments when you find yourself sitting there like a dope with your mouth hanging open - and this must have lasted around five minutes. I came back to the real world as if from a dream, and I also was delighted/horrified to discover that I was fighting back tears. The experience was that overwhelming. Now, it relates to the initial point because I had one of those realizations that I've been so remarkably fortunate to have seen so much of the world and to have had other moment like that. Then, of course, being a guy, I ruined it by thinking that I should really construct a list of the Top 10 most amazing, jaw-dropping, tears-inducing places I had ever visited.

Every so often I will scan through the over 450 posts that make up this silly little blog, and it's funny how many times I will write "if you ever visit ________, and every one should visit ________, then you should . . ." OK, if you ever visit Istanbul, and every one should visit Istanbul, you have to make a pilgrimmage to Hagia Sophia. Or, more appropriately, if you ever go to see the Hagia Sophia, and every one should see the Hagia Sophia, then you should see the rest of Istanbul. It is staggering to think that the building itself dates back to the 300s, and it reached the form we recognize around fifteen centuries ago during the time of Justinian, the greatest Byzantine emperor. For over a thousand years the dome, which ascends more than 180 feet in the air, was the largest dome in the world. It was a church for a thousand years, and then a mosque for around five hundred years (after the conquest of Constantinople by Mehmet the Conqueror in 1453), and it has been a museum since 1935 (as part of the secular modernization that was so much a part of Ataturk's dream). I one time opined that you recognize true genius when two seemingly contradictory things happen at the same time - you become both bigger and smaller. You become bigger in that you share some profound truth that connects you to a larger intellectual or spiritual or creative universe - but you also become smaller in that you are dwarfed by the enormity of that vision/truth. Hagia Sophia was that - it lived up to its Greek name, "holy wisdom."

Self-Portrait

2012-01-08T21:14:00.000-08:00

My favorite class to teach at Champlain is our Aesthetic Expression class that is in the second year. Like all Champlain classes it is interdisciplinary, and is a great fit for me because it focuses on art and literature and music, and is thus pretty clearly in my wheel house (or at least my perceived wheel house) - at the very least I really enjoy teaching it. The students are supposed to learn about the Western aesthetic, but also their own aesthetic. It is also designed to teach them how to interpret art. As Epictetus reminds us, "Making a statue requires skill, and viewing a statue aright requires skill also." A key component in the class is the creation of a student self-portrait. Some of my colleagues don't seem to like the project and complain that they get lousy results. I have been more fortunate, but that might relate to the fact that I really focus on it and encourage/prod/pound my students into giving me a quality product. My basic rule, which every one of my students can repeat (usually with a shutter) is "no collages" - well, actually, it is a little more graphic than that. The reason why I don't allow collages is that they're stupid, at least at any point past the 7th grade. More importantly, it is very difficult for them to convey any sense of uniqueness. OK, it is series of photo-shopped (or, old school, cut and pasted, and not computer cut and pasted) pictures of your mom and friends and hobbies. Well, I have a mom and friends (even me) and hobbies, so this tells me nothing. To simplify things I press them to think of the one thing that sets them apart from everyone who has ever existed, and it can be a painful process. Last summer a quarter of my students broke down in tears when presenting, which means they dug down a little more deeply than I was intending, but rather that than the alternative. Having said all this, the thing that I hope to do someday is take part in the experiment and create my own self-portrait. We look at a lot of famous and obscure self-portraits and take them apart, and I talk about what I would put in my own self-portrait, but I have never actually created my own. For some time I've been thinking about taking a drawing or painting class, not only for my own enjoyment/enrichment, but also so that I would know more to share with the students. Maybe this is a first step. Here's a picture I took of myself in a sultan's mausoleum next to the Hagia Sophia in Istanbul. You can just make me out. I was merrily snapping away at the beautiful tiles when I realized that I could see an outline of myself, and thus the experiment began. Maybe I like it because I am "lost" in the history, which probably speaks a lot about me. There is the old belief that psychologists go into their field to try and figure out why they're so crazy. In a similar way my friend Eric Usatch told me that people go into communication to figure out why they can't communicate. I've often thought that the reason why I like history so much is that it allows me to replace my own history with someone else's: a history more interesting or meaningful or important. So, I'm still there, you just have to work to find me. I've always been much more comfortable listening to other folks talk about themselves than talking about myself. Many people consider me to be a very good listener, and that may relate to the fact that I find other people's stories more interesting than my own - or it could just be a defense mechanism. Reveal more of your own history to me, while I hide my own.

Istanbul

2012-01-08T20:47:00.000-08:00

I've just returned to Abu Dhabi after an exhausting 34 hour flight from Vermont. I love living there, but it is so out of the way it is always a challenge to get there in any graceful fashion. Typically, I left at 11:30 on Thursday 5 January, and then endured a five hour layover in JFK, then a ten hour flight to Istanbul, then an eleven hour layover at the Istanbul airport (and I was just too tired to venture out so I just curled up in the quietest corner I could find and slept), and then a five hour flight down to Abu Dhabi - arriving at 4:00 a.m. on Saturday 7 January. The last two days have been devoted to trying to beat down the jet lag, which I think I've managed to do. The other reason why I didn't take the opportunity to leave the airport is that I carved off three days for myself in Istanbul on the way to Burlington. My travel agent, the long-suffering Rochelle, found a relatively inexpensive flight on Turkish Air with the requisite layover in Istanbul, and since I had never been there - and always dreamed of going there - I had her arrange for a three day stay. I loved it, and will have a lot more to say about it. I'll start off with an odd sign that I saw in the palace.

Red Wolves

2012-01-08T00:19:00.000-08:00

I am hesitant to include this post because it just calls down divine judgment, but if there has ever been a poster child for hubris it's me. In the face of all logic, if the Arkansas State Red Wolves (my all-time favorite college football team) wins the GoDaddy.com Bowl (my all-time favorite college bowl) then I will win the college football bowl pool. This illogical position has mainly been fueled by an inexplicable run of fifteen straight correct picks. The folks in the pool who actually know more about college football than me - and that is everyone but me - are stunned (as they should be). Go Red Wolves!!

Fleeting Bliss

2011-12-16T08:48:00.000-08:00

An absolutely delicious mango ice tea that I enjoyed in a nice restaurant right next to the ruins in Byblos, Lebanon. The shot was taken right before I managed to knock the entire thing into my lap. I may have said bad words.

Baby-Sitting the Barbarians

2011-12-16T08:36:00.000-08:00

One of the best parts of living at Quarry Hill was spending time with Mike and Jamie and their boys, referred to lovingly, albeit fearfully, as the Barbarians. I've posted pictures of Jack-Jack before, including his startling similarity to Jack Nicholson.

Here are a few pictures of a time when I was watching Nick and Jack-Jack while Mike and Jamie ran errands. Here they are tussling, shortly before Jack-Jack cracked his nose on the railing and had his daily nose bleed. Then there is a picture of Nick, completely unconvinced by my attempt to convince him that the 1975 Reds are the greatest team of all-time. I even had my starting lineup figures out to explain the logic.

Now, Jack-Jack was a little easier to convince, although he was still concerned that many of the Reds had "ploppy pants." However, he was very enthusiastic when it came to belting out his famous/infamous version of the National Anthem, which tends to circle back on itself and never quite get finished - but he enjoys it and so do I. Now, on the end of the spectrum is their younger brother Sam, aka Slug or Spud, who has not quite reached pure Barbarian maturity yet, and who, for some unknown reason, adores me. The older boys put up with me and will, especially Jack-Jack, demand to be put into the torture rack.

Spirits in the Rain

2011-12-16T08:19:00.000-08:00

I wish I would have had more time to spend in Lisbon. It was one of those crazy trips that you throw together on the fly, and I am so glad that I went - but I can't wait to get back for a longer stretch. Oddly, or not so oddly if you know me, one of the best parts of the trip was a very wet and windswept couple of hours that I spent in a cemetery that I stumbled across at the end of the trolley line. The entire cemetery was filled with fascinating mausoleums, a couple of which were broken in to (or at least in the midst of serious and clumsy repair). I still think in the one picture looking into the mausoleum you can see a ghost, but maybe I'm the only one who can see it. There is something soothing about walking around a cemetery. Lord knows I spent hours of my time in graduate school loafing around Spring Grove Cemetery in Cincinnati, often bringing books there to read. Even now when I head back to Cincinnati every spring for my fantasy baseball draft Dave and I always head out to Spring Grove for a long walk (made longer by the fact that we lose the car every time). I really like a couple of these pictures (along with the picture of the yellow roses from the same cemetery that I posted last week). The statue featuring the death mask is really creepy, and the mask, with water running down it, looks like it is ready to talk or spray mist. Mary and the flowers is also quite beautiful, and, stealing a line from Simple Men, "she's also the mother of God."

Creation Museum

2011-12-16T07:09:00.000-08:00

Of all the amazing things that Sanford and I experienced on the way to Guymon, Oklahoma, the one that we discussed the most - literally it came up in conversation almost once an hour for the rest of the trip - was our utterly bizarre visit to the Creation Museum outside of Cincinnati. I had heard about it and cajoled Sandy into making the trip, although he was more than a little aprehensive. It was easy enough to reach, sitting right off of Interstate 275 on the Kentucky side.

I think we were both a little shocked at the cost - $25 a piece, but, truthfully, it may be the best money I ever spent. If you want to understand America - today's sadly warped America - you definitely should visit it. Still, $25? I could have paid my way into the Herimtage Museum in St. Petersburg, Russia (my all-time favorite museum) almost three times over for what it cost to get into that ridiculous place. Sandy and I figured that it must have been to keep out the riffraff, although we made it in anyway. One the way over we had a serious discussion about what percentage of people would at the museum solely to giggle and mock. Sandy boldly predicted 50%. I'm not certain the exact percentage, but you could figure it out by taking two and dividing it by the number of people who strolled through the turnstyles that day. We were the only scoffers; every one else were true believers. And a lot of them. Just in our row in the parking lot we counted cars from over twenty different states. This was definitely a vacation destination spot.

If you haven't figured it out already, the Creation Museum is dedication to creationism, although in a very clever/evil way. It presents itself as a fair and balanced (Fox News, anyone?) attempt to get at the truth and beyond the tyranny of the leftward leaning secular "scientific" community. Although I don't know how fair and balanced it is to refer to Voltaire as an infadel. I don't know if I can truly do it justice. I wish that Blogspot as better for posting videos, because I have priceless ones (some of which you can see if you click on the link to Oklahoma Excellence blog). Some of the claims are wildly, creatively absurd - I didn't actually know the role that the theory of evolution played in Germany's entry into World War I, for instance. Others are more subtle, and thus, in my mind anyway, more dangerous.

The 800 pound gorilla in the room is Jesus and the archly-evangelical wing of Christianity, but beyond a few sly references he is almost non-existent (I included a picture of the stone being rolled back from his tomb, about the only direct reference). This, of course, is part of the not too subtle attempt to make it seem like a real museum and not a glossy propaganda vehicle. Most of the material featured is Old Testament, which is amusing/astonishing because, in addition to being anti-Arabic and misogynistic and racist, there is more than a hint of anti-semitism to the displays. Keep in mind that these are the same evangelicals who are so fascinated in Israel, not because they feel any true kinship to the Jews, but rather because of the role that a very specific destruction of Israel will play in the end times.

Probably my favorite part of the museum was the overwhelmingly pseudo-scientific attempt to promote the idea that the world is only around 4500 years old and that people lived at the same time as the dinosaurs. The display of dinosaurs walking up onto the ark was pretty convincing, along with the picture here of the dinosaurs resting comfortably on the ark in a bed of straw. The signs even explained that Noah brought baby dinosaurs on to the ark because they took up less space and were easier to control. One of the best discussions Sandy and I had was in response to the sign that explained how poisonous plants became poisonous after Adam and Eve were ejected from paradise. I launched into a theological argument with him, unfortunately too loudly, on the spot about the logical implications of that belief - and I thought we were going to be asked to leave by the security guards if not beaten by the true believers. The atmosphere was, to tell you the truth, pretty oppressive.

Now, before anyone gets insulted, please understand that this is not a specific anti-Christian or broader anti-religious rant. In my own peculiar fashion I am a deeply spiritual person. This is not even an attack on Creationism or the people who expouse that point of view. It's not what I believe in, but the world is a lot bigger than me and my belief system. Rather, I am horrified by the shameless bait and switch propaganda of the place. Come for the dinosaurs, stay for the sermon. I mean, it is just evil. All kids love dinosaurs, so why not draw them in and sell them this pseudo-scientific sermon. We live in a complicated age where people face serious issues, and promoting this brand of "thinking" doesn't benefit anyone. And, I would argue, it hurts religion itself more than anything else. Science can take care of itself. For that matter, God can take care of him/her/itself. Young children being indoctrinated - and taught very faulty logic - can't take care of themselves. There were children there on school trips, the buses lined up, waiting for the brain-washing and the gentle pithing.

What I Saw on Mulberry Street

2011-12-16T04:24:00.000-08:00

Another picture from the epic trip to Guymon, Oklahoma from this past summer. Once again, Sanford Zale happily put up some one of my odd requests (although I guess when you cajole your friend to spend two weeks driving to Guymon you have given them a lot of ammunition). Here's the house where I grew up in beautiful little Rising Sun, Indiana. And, yes, it is on Mulberry Street, in Rising Sun, Indiana. And how I got from there to Kasgar, China and Beirut, Lebanon and Mumbai, India and St. Petersburg, Russia and Nairobi, Kenya and Port Elizabeth, South Africa and Melbourne, Australia and Amman, Jordan and Muscat, Oman and Lisbon, Portugal and Alexandria, Egypt and Lucca, Italy and Fez, Morocco is anybody's guess. Wow, I am tall.

The Left

2011-12-16T04:17:00.000-08:00

Here's a nice picture that the excellent Sanford Zale snapped of me outside of the Eugene V. Debs home as we passed through my home state of Indiana. Sandy was a good soul to put up with my odd requests such as visiting the Debs homesite, the Creation Museum (more on that later), Holcomb, Kansas etc. Debs has always been a hero of mine and I can't believe that anyone could ever make a compelling argument against him being the greatest Hoosier. It is so odd to think that Indiana, such a grossly arch-conservative state, could have produced the most famous and influential American socialist. I am the black sheep socialist born into a family of Republicans (all of whom are much more socially liberal than they would ever let on) so it is natural that I would have been drawn to Debs. Now, granted that I am a hopeless romantic, but I've never believed that the left, specifically socialism, is dead. Today's Democrats are, for the most part, nothing more than Republican posers anyway - which is one of the things that I love about living in such an unabashedly liberal state like Vermont. We do have, in Bernie Sanders, the only socialist Senator in the US. However, even the Republicans in Vermont are a different breed, and I always argue that the average Indiana Democrat is more conservative than the average Vermont Republican. As the economic situation grows more and more dire, and the rich carve off more and more of the world for themselves, there has to be an alternative. The latest sobering statistic I saw is that one in two Americans is either living in poverty or has a low wage job. 50%. Is this what has become of the American dream? And yet we as a nation continue to dream that we'll, against all odds, become the rich ones, the ones that shouldn't have to pay the "death tax", the ones who shouldn't have to fund governmental assistance that more and more of us are queueing up for every year, the ones who will soon, soon, all too soon, benefit from the loop holes that allow the rich to escape without paying taxes. The Europeans, and with a touch of sadness, will sometimes speak of the passing of American democracy - has the same thing happened to the American moment? To me, the moment is past if we continue down this ridiculous path. For all of the old fear about socialism killing the American dream, in the end it might be what saves the American dream. But how to get there? Maybe the key question is figuring out whether the Occupy Wall Street movement actualy means something or if it is just fashion? Still, you have to start somewhere. As Marx reminds us, "I am nothing, but I must be everything."

Four Sport Triathlon

2011-12-16T02:21:00.000-08:00

Now, of course, I should be packing, but, instead, I'm getting caught up on some remarkably delayed blogging. I am doing laundry and have already worked out - and made arrangements to get my hair cut at 4:30 - so I am doing some constructive work (sort of). The end of the year - as well as the upcoming trip - have put me in a very reflective mood. As I think back upon the last year I am just consistently amazed at one extraordinary friends I have. And here is concrete evidence: the Four Sport Triathlon. Erik Eskilsen, one of Champlain's great unkown evil geniuses (besides just being a regular run of the mill genius - and an extraordinarily great guy) put together arguably the great sporting competition since the golden age of the ancient Greek Olympics. The competition featured minature golf, bowling, pool and darts. It was truly a competition for only the best and brightest, and one that severely tested even the hardiest of souls - especially when you calculate in the consumption of greasy food groups and adult beverages at every step along the way.

Now, anyone who knows me will tell you that I guard my birthday pretty tenaciously, and it was my belief that no one at Champlain (with the exception of a couple trusted souls) even knew my birthday. Normally I tell everyone I meet a different date to throw off the hounds. So, when I saw that Erik had scheduled the Four Sport Triathlon for my birthday, I figured it was a complete coincidence since there was no discussion involving the significance of that date. Needless to say, I was a big shocked when I showed up and discovered that the inaugural Four Sports Triahlon bore my name, which was proudly emblazened on the rules sheet. Beyond putting together the sports and calculating out the sporting venue logistics, Erik had also produced a remarkably complicated set of rules (and every page had a different picture of me, all swiped from the Internet).

Anyway, it was an amazing time. As it turns out I was only able to stick around for the first part of the competition because of a previous engagement, but from all accounts it was the stuff of legend. In the end Andy Burkhardt, probably because of his extreme youth, was able to outlast the last competitor and receive the laurel crown at Ake's Place (at around 2:30 in the morning, a more fourteen hours after the opening ceremonies).

Again, I am so blessed to have such amazing friends.

Vermont Bound

2011-12-16T00:16:00.000-08:00

We've reached, if not the end of the semester (Zayed will have three more weeks of school after we get back), at least the holiday break. I've had a wonderful time here, but I'm also anxious to get back to Vermont for a couple weeks. I'll be taking off tomorrow morning - 3:30 a.m. (yikes) - on Turkish Air with a layover in Istanbul, which I've turned into a three day visit. On the 20th I'll be heading back to the frozen tundra of Vermont. Actually, I don't think it is particularly frozen at the moment, but since I've been here for four months and haven't seen any rain at all and the low temperatures here have plummeted into the lower 60's, I'm sure Vermont will seem like a winter wonderland by comparison. Today is dedicated to packing, Turkey research, laundry, working out and general lounging about. It will be great to see my friends, and doubtless many chicken wings will be consumed and darts will be thrown.

College Football Pool II: the Sequel

2011-12-15T19:23:00.000-08:00

Time for this year's version (according to Mike Lange, the 53rd annaul) of the College Football Bowl Pool. This will only be my third. Oddly, I did pretty well both times, which makes no sense at all because I know nothing about college football. I tend to make picks based on all sorts of brilliants strategies such as: picking the team that is further south geographically, always picking against the Big 10, or choosing Troy University because I love the Iliad. I will be including my picks in bold as well as the picks of my bitter rival Cyndi Brandenburg (if she ever sends me her picks, that is). You would think the fact that I will not be in the country for the chicken wing eating competition would inspire her to take this opportunity to renew our age old rivalry.

New Mexico Bowl - 17 December
Temple vs Wyoming
Brandybuck's pick: Temple
I'll be flying out of Abu Dhabi on the 17th, which will sadly preclude me from watching the New Mexico Bowl or the Idaho Potato Bowl.

Idaho Potato Bowl - 17 December
Ohio vs Utah State
Brandybuck's pick: Ohio
I wonder if Mike Lange will be eating extra potato-based products to support his beloved Buckeyes? I wonder if they would consider moving this bowl to Ireland and renaming it the Potato Famine Bowl?

New Orleans Bowl - 17 December
San Diego State vs Louisiana-Lafayette
Brandybuck's pick: San Diego State
I have certain solemn beliefs, and one of them is that I would never marry a woman or pick a college team in a bowl pool wherein a hyphen is featured.

St. Petersburg Bowl - 20 December
Florida International vs Marshall
Brandybuck's pick: Florida International
This is a tough one because they are both southern schools and St. Petersburg is bitterly cold this time of year. That said, my research seems to indicate that Florida International University is a hotbed of Leninist fervor so I will back them to squeak by Marshall in the Petrograd
Bowl.

Poinsettia Bowl - 21 December
TCU vs Lousiana Tech
Brandybuck's pick: TCU
This bowl bothers me because it is a constant reminder that my absurd Hoosier education kept me from learning how to spell poinsettia (along with a lot of other words).

Las Vegas Bowl - 22 December
Arizona State vs Boise State
Brandybuck's pick: Boise State
Yes, as my son would say, I could pick Arizona State, but then I would have Sandy Zale hectoring me for months on end.

Hawaii Bowl - 24 December
Nevada vs Southern Mississippi
Brandybuck's pick: Southern Mississippi

Independence Bowl - 26 December
Missouri vs North Carolina
Brandybuck's pick: North Carolina

Little Caesars Bowl - 27 December
Western Michigan vs Purdue
Brandybuck's pick: Purdue
Yeah, this goes against my anti-Big 10ish philosophy, but my cousin Steve went to Purdue.

Belk Bowl - 27 December
Louisville vs North Carolina State
Brandybuck's pick: Louisville

Military Bowl - 28 December
Toledo vs Air Force
Brandybuck's pick: Toledo

Holiday Bowl - 28 December
Califormia vs Texas
Brandybuck's pick: Texas

Champs Sports Bowl - 29 December
Florida State vs Notre Dame
Brandybuck's pick: Notre Dame

Alamo Bowl - 29 December
Washington vs Baylor
Brandybuck's pick: Baylor

Armed Forces Bowl - 30 December
BYU vs Tulsa
Brandybuck's pick: BYU
I can't in all good conscience back Tulsa in this bowl because when Sandy Zale and I were in Tulsa last summer we visited three museums and they were all closed. Plus, there was no one in the downtown area - completely shiny and nice, but no one there. Creepy. It was like Sun Belt of the Living Dead.

Pinstripe Bowl - 30 December
Rutgers vs Iowa State
Brandybuck's pick: Rutgers

Music City Bowl - 30 December
Mississippi State vs Wake Forest
Brandybuck's pick: Wake Forest

Insight Bowl - 30 December
Iowa vs Oklahoma
Brandybuck's pick: Oklahoma

Meineke Car Care Bowl - 31 December
Texas A&M vs Northwestern
Brandybuck's pick: Texas A&M
One of my more brilliant strategies when selecting a team for this bowl is to pick against the team with the better academic tradition (which makes it easy for me to support my alma mater, the University of Cincinnati). It would be hard to find a better example of that logic than this game.

Sun Bowl - 31 December
Georgia Tech vs Utah
Brandybuck's pick: Georgia Tech
OK, so this completely flys in the face of the theory I just put for in the previous pick, but this is a complete homer pick from my days living in Atlanta.

Liberty Bowl - 31 December
Cincinnati vs Vanderbilt
Brandybuck's pick: Vanderbilt
Go Bearcats!! Now, coming back to my earlier theory, this is a great fit because I would grudgingly accept that Vanderbilt might be a slightly better school than Cincinnati . . .

Fight Hunger Bowl - 31 December
Illinois vs UCLA
Brandybuck's pick: UCLA
This pick makes me nervous because I almost universally pick against the Big 10ish (and not simply to tweak Mike Lange).

Chick-fil-A Bowl - 31 December
Virginia vs Auburn
Brandybuck's pick: Auburn
I almost universally pick an SEC team (and not simply to tweak Mike Lange).

TicketCity Bowl - 2 January
Houston vs Penn State
Brandybuck's pick: Houston
OK, I will leave aside the obvious and totally inappropriate Penn State jokes to ask this question: why are their no bowl games on New Year's Day? I know the bowl season has gone insane over the last few years, but there were always games on New Year's Day. Did the NFL buy them off?

Outback Bowl - 2 January
Michigan State vs Georgia
Brandybuck's pick: Michigan State
Total homer pick. Go Dawgs!! Oh, and Michigan State is in the Big 10.

Capital One Bowl - 2 January
Nebraska vs South Carolina
Brandybuck's pick: Nebraska
As is well-documented, Nebraska is my favorite college football team (locked in for some illogical reasons with all my other favorite teams in 1970).

Gator Bowl - 2 January
Ohio State vs Florida
Brandybuck's pick: Ohio State
Wow, Ohio University is playing in the Idaho Potato Bowl and the Gator Bowl? Is that a first? It will make for a great free tattoo!

Rose Bowl - 2 January
Wisconsin vs Oregon
Brandybuck's pick: Wisconsin

Fiesta Bowl - 2 January
Stanford vs Oklahoma State
Brandybuck's pick: Stanford
See earlier theory on betting against the better academic school.

Sugar Bowl - 3 January
Michigan vs Virginia Tech
Brandybuck's pick: Michigan
Clearly an anti-Big 10 pick.

Orange Bowl - 4 January
West Virginia vs Clemson
Brandybuck's pick: Clemson

Cotton Bowl - 6 January
Kansas State vs Arkansas
Brandybuck's pick: Kansas State
I'll be landing back in Abu Dhabi on the 6th, just in time to catch the game.

Compass Bowl - 7 January
SMU vs Pittsburgh
Brandybuck's pick: Pittsburth

GoDaddy.com Bowl - 8 January
Arkansas State vs Northern Illinois
Brandybuck's pick: Northern Illinois

National Championship - 9 January
LSU vs Alabama
Brandybuck's pick: LSU
Tie breaker: 31 points (didn't Brandybuck choose 122 points last year?) Brandybuck chose 45 for her tie-breaker.

Dreams of Samarkand

2011-12-14T23:59:00.000-08:00

It is not often that I write about places that I haven't visited (with the obvious exception of the overwhelming dreams related to my epic trip to Guymon, Oklahoma), but I guess my upcoming flight home has me thinking of travel. For some time now I've wanted to visit Samarkand, the old capital of Tamerlane's empire and a central city along the Silk Road. The desire only grew stronger because of my CIEE Silk Road experience from a few summers back (I had it as far west as Kasgar, which is practically passing out of China and into the wilds of Central Asia) and the Silk Road courses I teach at Champlain. So, since I'm here in Abu Dhabi for the year it seems only natural that I take the plunge. In the middle of the spring semester I have a two week break, the last week of March and the first week of April. What better opportunity for a trip to Samarkand? For that matter, what about expanding it to include a lengthy trek along the Silk Road, both east and west of Samarkand - or maybe even visiting all the Stans: Uzbekistan, Kazakhstan, Turkmenistan, Khrgyzstan and Tajikistan - or, for that matter, throwing in Afghanistan and Pakistan as well? As anyone who knows me can attest, dreaming insanley large is an essential part of who I am (and it makes me both charming and maddening at the same time). The first step is getting to Samarkand itself, which is proving to be much more difficult than you would think. Just check out the map - it simply is not that far away from Abu Dhabi. You cross over the Persian Gulf, then Iran and Turkmenistan, and, huzzah, you're in Uzbekistan and Samarkand. It shouldn't even be that long of a flight, if only you could get there. My initial attempts to arrange something on Travelocity or Skyscanner, using the most general parameters, kicked back that there were no flights. Really? Not one flight that ran from anyplace in the UAE to Samarkand, ever? Think about that response for a moment. If you enter just about any starting and ending points into a search engine it will get you there, even if there is no direct flight - otherwise no one would ever be allowed to leave Vermont. Friends of mine who are more technologically sophisticated than me came up with options that went through Moscow, and which cost a fortune. Hmmm, Moscow? I have my Lonely Planet Guide to Central Asia back in my office in Burlington, so I guess I'll just have to check it out there. Maybe you just need to fly into another city in the region and take a train/taxi/camel back to Samarkand and it all becomes easy. At this rate I'll never fulfill my Aurel Stein dreams. And speaking of which, I definitely want to go to Kabul, Afghanistan and pay a visit to Stein's obscure little gravesite there. I am pretty tenacious so we will be discussing this further.

Everybody Comes to Pepe's

2011-12-13T02:53:00.000-08:00

Guess I've had the film Casablanca on my mind (another obscure reference). If you're ever in Byblos, Lebanon, you have to stop at Pepe's Fishing Club Bar. It is located right on the beautiful little harbor and very easy to find. If you're at the ruins on the hill (more on that later), which is where everybody usually gets dropped off, you just retrace your steps down the winding road and you end up at the harbor. So, watch the sunset from the dock and then work your way to Pepe's for dinner and drinks.

Apparently Pepe was quite the character and the wall is full of pictures of him and various celebrities, including his very good friend Marlon Brando. My good friend (and ex-student) Lara says her mom knew him. The first picture is of Pepe's from across the harbor, and the second is looking out from Pepe's (check out the pointsetta in the corner). I'm also including a sadly very blurry picture of the menu, mainly because it must be a reproduction of Pepe in his splendor.

Corniche of Beirut

2011-12-12T00:48:00.000-08:00

If you visit Beirut, and you should, be sure to check out the Corniche. I know that we think in the US that no sane person would ever go to the Middle East, it is really a very short-sighted and utterly fatuous view. Granted, there are places where you might stumble into trouble, but that could also happen in New York or Chicago, of even in Burlington. As I've often stated, I've been all over the Middle East and have never had a bad experience. The Corniche winds around for a couple miles and it is a lovely walk. I suspect it would be a lot livelier at a different time of year, but it was actually pretty nice to be there at a time when it wasn't insanely crowded. So, let me post a few more pictures. The first is of my first view of the Corniche, as it stretched out in the distance. Eventually it takes a sharp left and you end up down my Pigeon Rock.

The second picture is turning back the other direction and zooming in a bit. You can see the mountains in the distance, including the snow covering at the peaks. And, yes, there is skiing in Lebanon.

The last picture is one of those shots which has no great value other than the fact that it makes me smile. I took it at the little seaside cafe where I stopped for white coffee (detailed earlier). There are a lot of fishermen along the entire Corniche, and one is in the distance. Up close is a beautiful black cat, who sort of reminds me of my old cat, Alex the Droog, from my Cincinnati days. He determined to get my attention (and part of my lunch).

Colors of Lisbon

2011-12-11T06:42:00.000-08:00

And here's another picture of Lisbon, this one taken from the castle above the city (more on that later). One of the reasons why I chose Lisbon is that I wanted to get away from plastic-land for awhile and spend some time in some place a little grittier. As I discussed earlier, Lisbon also provided some much needed rain. In addition it provided colors, even against the overcast sky. Grey rainy days are great for taking close-up pictures, but they are also good for snapping photos where the colors really jump out at you. I would suspect that if you visited Lisbon in the sun-splashed summer the colors would be washed out a bit, although I plan on going back then. When I was there the colors were so vibrant. I don't know if it relates to being on the coast or being Portuguese, but the colors on the houses were so bright and festive - even in the midst of gloom.

Christmas in Beirut

2011-12-11T00:41:00.000-08:00

"In the unlikely event of a Christmas tree landing . . ."

I don't know why I find this picture so funny, but I do. It is the Christmas decoration that is centrally located in the Beirut airport. It doesn't really inspire a lot of confidence.

Lisbon

2011-12-10T21:35:00.000-08:00

And another place I've been ignoring as I've been failing so magnificently as a blogger: Portugal. I had a chance to go there recently for a visit and absolutely loved it. There are a ton of Portugal-themed posts that I'll be making. However, I thought I'd just post this picture as a starter because I am in a certain state of mind. It rained the entire time I was there, often pouring. And considering that I've been here in the UAE for almost four months with no rain at all I revelled in getting soaked in Lisbon. Here's a shot I took in a wonderful cemetery that I stumbled across on a a windswept day. The generally meloncholy nature of the picture matches my mood today, which maybe relate to missing Lisbon or missing the rain or just my general end of the year blues.

My New Place

2011-12-09T22:28:00.000-08:00

Wow, I really am behind in blogging - as best exemplified by the fact that I haven't even said anything about my new place. I really liked living in the Radisson Blu out here on Yas - very posh - but when you're going to be someplace for a year, simply living in a hotel isn't a good fit. So, around a month ago I moved to the Staybridge Suites, which, actually, are only around fifty meters up the road from the Radisson. I talked to Zayed about moving and they were very cool about it and made all the arrangements (when you teach at Zayed they pay for your housing, or at the very least give you a housing allowance). There are six hotels out here on the Golf Plaza, and they are tied together in pairs. So, the Radisson Blu was tied to the Park Inn (posh and not so posh). The Staybridge is designed more for long-term stay and is tied to the Crowne Plaza, which is next door. This means I can use the Crowne Plaza fitness centre and also I get a discount of eating at the restaurants there. We don't have a restaurant in the Staybridge, which I actually quite like - it makes it a lot quieter because nobody who is not staying here would be stopping by.

It is still really nice, just not as posh as the Radisson Blu. We still get complimentary breakfasts in the morning and a happy hour. That said, it is decidedly less spectacular than the Radisson. Ours is only four nights a week, but is more family-friendly (as you might expect, there are a lot more kids here) with dishes like pasta (which, again, I find preferable) and the drinks are just coffee or fruit juice. The hub is open twenty-four hours a day and is stocked with a coffee-maker (passable lattes) and fruit and cookies. The lobby is quite nice with big comfy chairs for reading and there is a little side library. Sometimes I just come down of an evening, grab a latte and sit in the lobby or outside and read. The rooms are smaller than the Radisson, but also a lot brighter (the RB is a lot darker). I also only have one bathroom now, as compared to having two bathrooms for some reasons in the Radisson. I am most excited (and I know this sounds really pathetic) to actually have a kitchen and a washer/dryer. It means I don't have to do laundry math anymore (at the RB I had 14 free items of laundry a week, which meant that every Friday morning I had to lay out all my dirty clothes and decide which ones were going to be laundered and which ones were going to be cleaned in the sink and hung out to dry on the balcony). Having a kitchen is really nice, even if it is for nothing more than making myself a cup of soup. After some extensive shopping around I bought myself a new slow cooker (my old one is in storage back in VT). Who knew it would be so hard to find a slow cooker - apparently they are not popular in the UAE - and the one I bought it pretty huge, but it was the only one I could find. Plus, I will be leaving it here when the year is up if I come back to VT, because I certainly am not going to ship it and the plugs are completely dirrent. So far I made a very good batch of chicken soup and a blisteringly hot batch of chili. The problem with the chili, which I am still eating on, is that I was working with new ingredients - and the chili powder was incendiary Indian chili powder and not the usual American chili powder I am used to. It is pretty brutal, but I am eating it nonetheless because I am stubborn. So far I am really enjoying my stay here, although I miss my friends back at the Radisson Blu. It does feel very homey here. I was tossing my dirty clothes into the corner of my bathroom because I had not managed to buy a clothes hamper, and I came in one day to find that the Staybridge folks had given me one. Occasionally I will come in of an evening and the dishes, wish I had left out to dry have been put away - always a pleasant surprise. I have one of those combination washer/dryers, which means that it is fairly small and doesn't dry completely, but there are also free washers and dryers downstairs. Yes, very nerdy, but even the washers and dryers make me happy.

Picnic at Pigeon Rock

2011-12-09T08:14:00.000-08:00

And I even had some cake (now there is an obscure film reference). Beirut itself does not have many areas of natural beauty, although the Corniche itself is quite pretty. However, if you follow the Corniche along you eventually come to Pigeon Rock, which is a very lovely place to watch the sun go down (although not as pretty as Byblos). There is a nice little cafe right on the Corniche called Bay Rock Cafe, where I snapped this picture. The Corniche itself is rather odd in that although there are buildings that run along the entire way there are not many restaurants (I counted about four) and only a few coffee shops. So, be sure to grab something to eat at the Bay Rock Cafe before heading a little further inland for a drink. At the other end of the Corniche there is a cute little hotel called the Bay Watch Hotel, which has a nice, albeit completely deserted, outside bar on the 7th floor which has a great view of the Corniche. I went there twice and both time it was completely abandoned in an almost spooky fashion. The folks working there would not have been nicer and it was very clean with good food and drinks, but I couldn't quite figure out why I was the only one there. Weird.

Byblos Sunset

2011-12-07T01:28:00.000-08:00

I guess after that last depressing post I needed to put up something a little happier before getting back to work. Well, maybe posting pictures of the ravaged Holiday Inn is not really that depressing. Maybe, as my good friend Sandy would propose, it is really a story of redemption (although he will usually follow that up by opining that it always ends in tears). For all of the horror Beirut is still standing, and I am really looking forward to getting back for a longer visit. Here is a picture that I took as the sun was going down in Byblos, which is a lovely spot about forty kilometers north of downtown Beirut. I'll have a lot more to say about it later. At this point I just wanted to post this picture, which may be the nicest one I've ever taken. Of course, the sun was going down over a beautiful little Mediterranean harbor, so it would have taken some effort to muck that up. Still, as I sat out on the end the dock watching the sun disappear in the west, it was about as serene a moment as I can ever recall.

Ghosts of Beirut

2011-12-07T01:07:00.000-08:00

Holiday Inn. And, sadly, not the Christmas-time classic movie. While in Beirut I stayed right around the corner from the iconic Holiday Inn, made famous/infamous during the dark days of the civil war. It was just about completed but never occupied, and it became a favorite location for snipers (as you can tell from the bullet and rocket holes). Many building around it (including a shiny new building which almost touches it, which you can see on the right in the last picture) have been rebuilt/rehabbed, but the Holiday Inn itself remains untouched.

Its only inhabitants today are soldiers and tanks. It seems that they intend to leave it as a sad reminder of a horrible time in Lebanon's past. I got pretty close and busily snapped away with my camera, and finally one of the soldiers, politely, told me not to take any more. I apologized and he just waved me along. There was much less of a military presence inside the city that I thought there might be, just the occasional small grouping of soldiers on key street corners or above sharp bends in the road.

At no point did I feel in danger, except when the taxi drivers were taking me somewhere at breakneck speed (but that's another story).

White Coffee

2011-12-06T19:03:00.000-08:00

Here are a couple shots from a pretty little seaside cafe in Beirut where I stopped for a cup of coffee. You can get a sense of the sweep of the corniche, and also of the mountains in the background. I ordered a white coffee, which is usually code for coffee with milk. However, in this case it was just a cup of hot water, which, with the color of the cup, did turn out white. It wouldn't have been so odd if they had brought along some tea bags, but it was just hot water (although with plenty of sugar). The waiter seemed a little mystified that I sent it back.

Beirut

2011-12-04T20:02:00.000-08:00

I am very far behind in my blogging duties, but have absoloutely no time to even think about it now. Between two new preps and administrative chores - and Mike Lange just sent me the college football bowl pool form - I am buried. So, I'll just post a quick picture as a place-holder and get back to this later. Many things have happened lately, but the one that is freshest in my mind is the trip I just took to Lebanon. I have always wanted to visit Beirut, and I took advantage of the long National Day weekend here in the UAE, and a cheap flight, to fly over to Lebanon for three days. I had a lot of fun, and the requisite screaming match with a taxi driver, and can't wait to get back. Several of my friends back home were concerned about me flying to Beirut, but it is an odd result of the Arab Spring that Beirut is now one of the "safe" places to visit in the area. And they certainly would love some visitors. Right now a visa, which you can pick up at the airport easily, is free. Here's a fairly nice picture I took as I was walking along the Corniche looking out at the Mediterranean.

Dragon Boat Race

2011-10-29T11:56:00.000-07:00

This past weekend we finally participated in the Dragon Boat Race. Hopefully in the next week before taking off for Eid break I'll be able to post a lot of pictures - in between the race and the post-race barbecue/Halloween party I took over a hundred pictures. Now, first off, it was a lot of fun. It some ways it was a typically odd Emirati event in that we spent the time shuttling between posh hotels (which made it different than most Emirati events wherein you're shuttling in between posh hotels and posh malls), which always makes everything feel pretty artificial. This is especially so when I read about my good friend Trish's amazing adventures this weekend in Wadi Rum in Jordan (and let me throw in my usual pitch for folks to read Trish's blog, which can be accessed from my blog list at the lower right).

Now, that said, the folks who made up the Zayed teams were great and we had a blast, even if it did drag on for hours. We had to report at 9:30 on Friday morning, and our first race wasn't until 12:00 and the semi-final was at 4:00. My suspicion is that everything was set up this way so that you were trapped there all day and forced to buy food and drink (and towels for 75 dirhams and robes for 100 dirhams) from the venders. Luckily we found a great shady spot under some palm trees and it made for a pleasant day, interrupted by swimming, napping, eating and sneaking inside the hotel to grab cool drinks at Starbucks. Everything went off without any problems, although there was some initial concern that our start time was too close to afternoon prayers, especially a big deal on Friday, but we made it work. Now, our team, after a couple great practices, rowed horribly in the first heat, leading to the appearance of the famous/infamous/epic Scudder teamper. I don't mind losing (much), but I hate being incompetent and we just were. We were much better in the second heat, but still finished well back of the pack. That evening there a fun barbecue behind Traders Hotel, which is maybe a hundred hards down the road from the Shangri-La Hotel where the race was run. Fantastic food, and some interesting costumes. Around half the costumes were devils, and I'm not certain of what to make of that.

Here are a few quick pictures to get things started. At the top I have one of those odd pictures which seems to capture the ridiculous and the sublime, which is an essential part of life in the UAE. In the foreground is one of the corporate teams heading towards the starting line while in the background is the Sheikh Zayed Grand Mosque. Then I've posted a picture of myself, which is something that I normally never do, but since it is apparently snowing back in Vermont I figured I had to post it if for no other reason that to tweak (or as my British friends here say, wind up) my friends back home in VT. Then there is a picture of my good friend Laura posing with the dragon, at a happier moment before they had a big falling out later that ended in accusations and threats/counter-threats (which she normallyu reserves for her running argument with the female voice of her GPS machine). Finally there is a fun picture of Liane and Tanja engaged in a very animated discussion. Definitely a great time, although it's left me moving pretty slow today.

Abu Dhabi Film Festival

2011-10-23T03:51:00.000-07:00

I guess I should start off by explaining the picture. This is a picture taken on the way in to Abu Dhabi from Yas Island. There are a couple ways to get out there, and this is the newer road. Right now it is sparsely developed, although that certainly won't last. So why the picture? Partly, it relates to the number of times that I travelled back and forth to view films at the Abu Dhabi Film Festival. Plus, I just think it is an evocative shot, and sort of reminds me of the opening scene of Fargo. It also speaks to my general homesickness of late - it reminds me of winter in Vermont, with the ribbons of sand replacing the ribbons of snow on a wind-swept day. Now, the Film Festival itself. I loved it! For some reason I never went to the Green Mountain Film Festival back home, although if I make it back to VT I'll definitely be attending the next one. The film festival was more than a bit chaotic, and featured the usual unnecessary chaos which marks most aspects of life in the Emirates, but overall it was a great experience. I saw six films, and would have seen more if I had been able to make my schedule work: Monsieur Lazhar (Canada); Almost in Love (U.S. Independent); The End (Morocco); She Monkeys (Sweden); Troll Hunter (Norway); and Smiles of a Summer Night (Sweden). I really liked all of them, and they ranged from good to great. It was great to see Ingmar Bergman's Smiles of a Summer Night on the big screen. Fanny and Alexander closed out the Festival, but I was off participating in the second dragon boat practice so I couldn't see it. One think of Bergman films as being so deeply brooding, but Smiles of a Summer Night really displayed his humor - I laughed out loud several times. Of the newer films I think that She Monkeys was the best, although I liked it less after hearing the director talk at the end. That said, I think I liked all of them less after listening to the directors (maybe I don't really want to see what is behind the curtain). The female director of She Monkeys was clearly shocked that the film was chosen for a Middle Eastern film festival and it was her first trip to the region, and I think she might have been uncomfortable with what she could say or couldn't say, which is also understandable. However, to be fair, and to the credit of the film festival, the films were shown uncut. The most pleasant surprise was Troll Hunter. Think of a more clever, self-assured and funny Blair Witch Project and you'll have a sense of the movie. The director had the confidence to be scary, but also occasionally wink at the audience and say, essentially, "yeah, this is a movie about trolls so we can't take ourselves too seriously all the time." For example, there's a great scene where the troll hunter, followed around by a group of documentary film-making students, tries to capture a troll by placing first one, then two, and finally three goats on a bridge, and the troll comes up from underneath, and you would have to have been completely out of it to not get the Billy Goats Gruff reference. I saw the movies either by myself (I have always loved going to movies by myself), Laura (who can't stop talking about Troll Hunter) or Tanja (who is a huge movie buff, and who, in addition to knowing a lot more about movies than me, must have gone to a dozen films or more - and was a great person to spend time dissecting the movies with on the long drives back to Yas). I'm already missing the festival, although Shark Night 3D is opening soon (although I doubt it can compare to Shark Attack 3, one of the favorite bad movies that my son and I love).

Voodoo

2011-10-19T22:39:00.000-07:00

So I was going through the pictures on my phone when I came across these funny shots from New Orleans. I posted so much about the Oklahoma and New Orleans trip on the OKexcellence blog, and didn't spend any time on those trips in this blog. Maybe I'll steal a few pictures and just write some commentary, especially about the Creation Museum outside Cincinnati, which still makes my head hurt. These pictures were taken at the Voodoo Museum in New Orleans, not surprisingly. We were discussing syncretic religions the other day in my class and I used voodoo as an example, so I'm doubly inspired to get the pictures up. The first is of me making a new friend. It is the pet snake of the museum owner/currator/voodoo priest, who was nice enough to let me handle the beast. The second shot is of the excellent Steve Wehmeyer posing with a mask at the museum. I can't say enough about Steve, who has quickly become one of my best friends and favorite people on the planet. He could not have been a better tour guide or truer friend on the trip, and I really should post an edited version of our crazy trip down Bourbon Street the last night with Andy's credit card (maybe this weekend). Steve has been travelling to New Orleans for years so I received the true inside scoop, and I can't wait to go back to Nawlins with him again.

Chicken Wings for Charity Redux

2011-10-19T03:35:00.000-07:00

OK, so I should have completed this post a long time ago - and I certainly don't have time to work on this right now (finishing grades for my ZU students) - but with the world premiere of The Nostradamus Cycle upon us I can't put it off anymore. So, I will take the opportunity to post the pictures, with limited commentary (which is probably for the best anyway). This last Super Bowl Sunday we held our second annual Chicken Wings for Charity event, once again supporting the homeless shelter (at least the Gentlemen of Excellence supported the homeless shelter - lord knows that Cyndi's team probably pocketed the cash). There were some changes this year, starting with a new partner for the GOE. The most excellent Erik Esckilsen replaced the faltering Andy Burkhardt, and performed brilliantly, actually tying last year's record (55) for most wings consumed. The record didn't last long because I ended up eating 61, and suffered for days. This is definitely not an old man's sport, and Andy should have shown more loyalty to the team, unless he is trying to get the more senior Gentlemen of Excellence to die of heart attacks so that he can climb up the seniority ranks. The other new factor this year is that we lost, and pretty badly. Now, to be fair, the Eat More Kale Team, the Brandenburg-Vespas, did cheat like dogs this year. For one thing, it was four on two, so that even though Erik and I consumed the most individually, as a team we were thumped. Plus, the BVs allegedly made use of only one of the twins, but we suspected that there may have been some Twin Shenanigans, even despite the best efforts of the truly excellent referee Steve Wehymeyer to keep tabs on them. Finally, the BVs unleashed the little wolverine, Joey, who easily ate his body weight in wings. Still, we raised over $1100 for the homeless shelter, and it was a magnificent time once again. The question is, with me in the Middle East, who will step forward for the GOE and champion the team this year?

The most excellent Erik.

Team Eat More Kale. I have never understood the whole Eat More Kale concepts, or even kale in the first place, which is truly horrid. However, the shirts were cool. Again, you can see the Twins, and the potential for unlimited, spontaneous Twin Magic. And look at Joey - who knew he was such a bottomless pit?

I did feel good for Bill, who clearly redeemed himself after a faulty showing the year before - and having his shrewish wife throwing him under the bus in a newspaper article for failing to eat more. It was, as Sanford reminds us, a story of redemption.

The Wolverine, pictured below in his winter coat, and looking appropirately mischievious.

The logistics of such an operation were exhausting, especially keeping tabs on the rampant cheating of the BVs.

As always, the event drew a crowd of supporters, which was greatly appreciated. Among the crowd you can see the excellent Sanford Zale playing with a borrowed flip camera, which was the beginning of the filming of the soon to be award-winning The Nostradamus Cycle.

And, finally, Cyndi reveling in her victory, her accumulated swag, and her Machiavellian double knavery.

My Amazing Friends

2011-10-18T23:29:00.000-07:00

I have made this point before, but I will make it again - I have the most amazing friends, certainly far better than I deserve. And yesterday I received a reminder, in fact two of them, of how great they are, and how much I miss them. First off, I received an email, copied below, from the amazing Sanford Zale (my partner in the now legendary trip to Oklahoma, chronicled in the blog which can be reached through my blog list) detailing the long-awaited world premiere of The Nostradamus Cycle. This film - well, actually, it is closer to an epic, and certainly far more than a movie - documents the second annual chicken wing eating competition for charity. The most excellent Sanford, Erik and Andy edited the film for over nine months, in fact I think it took longer to finish than Coppola's final cut of Apocalypse Now (a film of far more modest scope). It is now complete and I wish I were there to attend the world premiere. How it was not chosen for consideration at the Abu Dhabi Film Festival (more on that later) is beyond me. If that were not enough, when I arrived back at my room at the Radisson I found a letter mysteriously slid under my door. It was from the excellent Andy, who, in addition to a very sweet letter, also included the used cheese curd container from the A & W Restaurant in Middlebury, Vermont. Andy, Mike Lange and I had made a sojourn there last year (also recorded on this blog) and they were sending along a reminder of their own trip there recently, and letting me know how much I was missed. It was very touching, and you can still see the grease stains on the box. For those of you who are not familiar with a cheese curd - and, truthfully, if you are that unsophisticated how did you get access to the Internet? - they are fried cheese. They remind Mike and Andy of their upper midwestern roots, and, besides being utterly delicious, are probably the worst thing you could probably eat.

"Dear friends –

You are invited to attend one or both parts of a major Spectacle that will occur on Thursday, 20 October. The particulars are these:

PART ONE:

The world premiere of The Nostradamus Cycle, a movie about a chicken-wing eating contest, filmed by me and edited by Messrs. Burkhardt and Esckilsen, will occur at 5:00pm on Thursday, 20 October, in Ireland 017. This is a Work of Art, and it runs for about 13 minutes. Featured in this movie are the following thespians:

--Her Excellency Cinse Bonino;

--Cyndi Brandenburg, President of the Faculty of this College and chicken-wing eater;

--The aforementioned Burkhardt, one of the cinematographers responsible for all of this;

--Ben Cavallari, one of only two characters whose expletives had to be deleted, as this film is rated PG;

--Cinematographer Esckilsen, who in the movie is seen to be doing something that is disgusting;

--Dr. Michael Kelly, seen, among other things, to be drinking beer in this movie;

--Mike Lange, who has important things to say about salad in this movie;

--Well-known partier Megan Munson-Warnken;

--Excellent Norwich University librarians Ms. Heidi Steiner and Mr. Elliot Polak;

--Plenipotentiary Gary Scudder, captured on film prior to his having fled the country;

--Her Excellency Pat Suozzi *and* her husband, Bob;

--William Vespa, husband of the chicken-wing eating President of the Faculty of this College; also, their son;

--Mr. Kenneth Wade, in fact a thespian, who steals the show at a certain point in the movie;

--Steve Wehmeyer, following up his role in the movie Titanic with a speaking role in The Nostramadus Cycle;

--Sanford Zale, the other character whose expletives had to be deleted, as this film is rated PG.

PART TWO:

Cast and crew party, to which all recipients of this e-mail message are invited, at the Old Northender bar, following the airing of the movie. This bar is on the south side of North Street, near the intersection of North Street and North Avenue. One imagines that, at some point, those who would like to play poker, will.

Thanks – Sandy"

This has left me more than a tad homesick.

Some Things are Universal

2011-10-18T04:47:00.000-07:00

I'm posting this mainly for my great friend Cinse at home, who introduced me to the vegan cupcake at Uncommon Ground back in Burlington. I was sitting in the provost's meeting today here at Zayed and had this realization that some things are just universal. Of course, I realized it because I was paying no attention to the presentation and was grading papers, which is what ALL professors do at ALL administratively themed meetings ALL over the planet. The universality of it reminded me of walking down to the female wing last week to buy Aya, my administrative assistant, her weekly treat, in this case a cupcake. Yes, one of the groups on campus was having the most universal of fund-raisers, the Bake Sale. And the cupcake was so good.

The Mist

2011-10-17T22:24:00.000-07:00

The season is starting to change here in the UAE, and apparently one of the signs is fog. As one of the professors put it, October is a foggy month. The temperature is not as ungodly hot as it was, and for a while the humidity had broken, but the humidity has come back with a vengenge. Tanja and I were catching a late movie at the Film Festival downtown on Sunday night, and when we walked out of the theatre past 11:00 the humidity was so high that my glasses steamed up immediately. That set us up for yesterday morning when I woke to the thickest fog I have ever seen, which made getting into work more than a bit of a challenge (made worse by the fact that Emiratis tend to drive way too fast). The fog was so thick that you couldn't even see the Zayed University building, which is huge, until you were about ten feet away from it. We actually got lost in the parking lot getting to school. Amazing. Tony tells me that the appearance of the fog also means that everyone will get sick, which is an old wive's tale, but one that he is starting to believe. To be fair, it seems that everyone of us has a cold, so maybe there is something to it.

I also chose to entitle this blog post The Mist because that is apparently my new nickname, given to me by Tanja and Laura, which relates to my tendency to, like mist, come and go and sometimes just disappear altogether. Actually, I like it very much, and, sadly, it is utterly appropriate. Every one of my friends would have their own story of me suddenly disappearing from some social event because I just needed to be alone. As the great Canadian philosopher reminds us, "I need a crowd of people, can't stand them day to day." My one concern would be that the name sounds too much like Master Shake's alter-ego, The Drizzle.

First Dragon Boat Practice

2011-10-17T00:06:00.000-07:00

But not the last. Unlike some people I could mention but won't, mainly because I'm sworn to protect the identity of this thirty year old British slacker who was doubtless sitting back in room 137 of the Radisson Blu Hotel rereading Anna Karenina (this could be anyone, of course), I showed up Saturday afternoon for our first dragon boat practice. Zayed University is actually sponsoring two teams, and our team, Team 2, the winning team, wasn't scheduled to practice until 4:00, which was better than the fate that awaited the first team, Team 1, the losing team, which had to practice in hotter weather at 2:00.

Truthfully, when I arrived at the insanely posh Shangra-la Hotel I was not in the mood for rowing out under the hot Emirati sun for two hours (and the mad dog and Englishmen, although obviously not certain Englishwomen, line really resonated). That said, it was actually a lot of fun. Champlain always fields a team for our dragon boat race at home, but, being by nature contrary, I have never participated, much to the chagrin of my friends who do. Why? I don't know. I've eaten chicken wings for charity and pulled fire trucks for charity and been dunked for charity, but somehow never participated in the dragon boat race. However, comrades, I am here making a pledge that if I return to Champlain I will definitely participate next year.

On our team's boat we had around twenty people, with only room for one more hypothetical Englishwoman. The first thing we needed to do was get some training on how to get on the boat and general safety, and then suddenly we were out on the water. Under the generally gentle prodding of our instructor we eventually figured things out, although at the beginning there was mainly a lot of splashing and so many oars clashing together that it sounded like an out-take from Robin Hood and Little John contesting for mastery of a log. I was seated next to a younger Zayed guy named Matt who was almost as big as me - and, logically, we were placed in the center, widest, part of the boat. Still, we also had to learn how to lift the oars is a very specific way, straight over our heads, so that we didn't end up braining the person sitting next to us. By the end we were doing a pretty fair job of it, although, truthfully, I think we were about one missing Englishwoman short of being truly amazing (I'm just saying). It was also a great experience because it gave me the chance to meet new people, which is not something I'm particularly good at doing. Luckily, I did know a few people, who introduced me to other people, and so my circle of friends is growing. Emma, a friend of Liane, and another Kiwi, was also on Team 2, and had the misfortune to be placed up front and instructed to shout out the commands of One Two One Two to keep us in rhythm, and by the end she could barely speak. It was hard enough focusing on breathing without having to also worry about shouting out cadence for the entire time, so thankfully I was not given that chore. By the end I was exhausted and soaked, in between splashing and sweat, from head to toe. After stumbling out of the boat I strolled into the Shangra-la as if I actually stayed there and took a shower, which made me a little more presentable when I immediately went off to the Film Festival (Emma was kind enough to give me a ride because she was also heading down to the Festival).

So, exhausting, but really wonderful. Just being out on the water and watching the sun setting over the Grand Mosque made the entire adventure worthwhile. One more practice next Saturday at 4:00, and then the race itself the weekend after. Oh, and when I was showering at the Shangra-la I actually got a cramp IN MY CHEST! Bloody hell, it hurt, and that was definitely a first. Nevertheless, I will be there next Saturday, doubtless in the company of a chastised and wiser anonymous Englishwoman.

The Wretched Vikings

2011-10-16T23:22:00.000-07:00

Here is a great picture that my friend Andy sent me. He's decked out in the Vikings gear that I left him, including my thirty-five year old Fran Tarkenton jersey, to root for our mutual curse, the Minnesota Vikings. One of the things that I miss the most about home is meeting up with Andy and the excellent Heidi down at Ruben James for beers and chicken wings on game day. That said, I am not blaming him for the horrific state of the team this year in my absence. Over four decades ago I latched on to that woeful franchise as my favorite NFL team, and they have given me nothing but misery. Every other team that I have ever adopted has rewarded me with at least one championship (even the normally underachieving Reds have won the title three times in my lifetime), but the Vikings remain a blight on my existence. That said, I am no fair weather fan and will continue to support them, doubtless straight on into the grave. Well, at least we can support Heidi's favorite team, the Lions, with a clear conscience now.

It's Dr. Scudder, If You're Nasty

2011-10-15T22:43:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I'll apologize in light of that remarkably bad pun (especially since I went out of my way to broadcast, and mock, that astonishingly bad Tsonga Sung Blue headline pun the other day). As I've been considering the idea of putting together a top fifty list of things to do in the UAE I was planning on including seeing a concert, although I was focusing my attention on Metallica's visit next week. As is so often the case in my life over the last few years, that plans changed. I was sitting around at the Radisson Blu happy hour on Thursday night when the amazing Rafael (more on him later - he deserves his own post) showed up with free Janet Jackson tickets. Now, I'm not a fan, but free is free.

The concert itself was held at an open air arena at the formula one race track about a ten minute walk from my hotel. Now, it took a lot longer than ten minutes, but that is because we drove, which led to a misadventure which turned the ten minute walk into an hour drive. The concert was OK. It was billed as a number one hits concert, although it was further proof of how little contact I have with popular culture because I didn't know many of the songs. Too many of the songs were slow ballads, which I'm not opposed to if you have the voice, but she, much like her brother, just doesn't have the pipes. Still, it was fun to get out of the hotel, and it launched what proved to be a crazy weekend.

I ended up spending my time at the concert with Tanja and Laura, usually just referred to as the Evil Twins (although I am promoting She Monkeys, which is related to one of the films playing at the Abu Dhabi Film Festival). On the surface they would seem to have almost nothing in common (Tanja is Serbian while Laura is a Brit), but they are fast friends and inseparable. It was great to go out with them, but they ran me ragged (although they dismissed it as a slow evening).

Blurry Weekend

2011-10-15T22:25:00.000-07:00

In previous posts I've discussed the need to really try and get more involved in my life here in Abu Dhabi. In some ways I feel that I've held Zayed and Abu Dhabi at an arm's length since arriving, which is really not like me. Oddly, I think part of it relates to the fact that it would be very easy to just stay here now, and maybe I'm afraid of that possibility so I have not been as fully engaged in my life here as I normally would be. This week was truly an exception. The entire weekend was a blur, which I'll be dealing with in several posts. It started with an unexpected trip to a Janet Jackson concert of all things, and also featured a trip to a pub for fish and chips and several games of pool and watching a rugby match, an exhausting dragon boat practice, and two films as part of the Abu Dhabi Film Festival. It truly was an Abu Dhabi weekend, and it has left me excited but exhausted. Here's an appropirately blurry picture (I do love themes) of my friend Laura. One of the nice things about the weekend was getting to spend more time with her. She's another one of the Zayed folks staying out at the Radisson Blu, and she's the Remnant that I knew the least, so it was cool to hang out with her. She is every bit the reading fiend that I am so we had some great conversations, including this one at Gellar Chocolate at the Marina Mall.

Worst Pun Award

2011-10-13T05:34:00.000-07:00

Headline in the Khaleej Times this morning recounting the tennis upset of Jo-Wilfried Tsonga to Kei Nishikori: "Tsonga sung blue." Now, I defy you to get the tune out of your head - it's been running through mine all day.

Khaleej Times Stories - 10 October

2011-10-11T21:28:00.000-07:00

Because I'm ensconced in a business suite I wake up every day to a copy of the Khaleej Times hanging from my door. I try to read a little bit of it every day, but then catch up over leisurely breakfasts on Friday and Saturday mornings. The other Remnants scoff at the Khaleej Times, and, I suppose, if you're used to papers in London or Auckland, that is a valid criticism. However, if you're used to reading the utterly wretched Burlington Free Press then the Khaleej Times would be a good paper. Occasionally I plan to pull out a summary of a couple of the stories which seem to be representative of life in the Emirates.

Death for 2 in double murder linked to bootlegging rivalry

Two were buried alive; thirteen defendants involved in conflict

"Dubai - The Court of Appeals on Sunday upheld the dealth sentence of a bootlegger and escalated the life term of another to death for kidnapping and killing two rival bootleggers.
And Indian blacksmith, 26, had his death sentence upheld for his main role in the planning and execution of kidnapping and burying two rival bootleggers alive. . .
All the defendants, including 12 Indians and one Pakistani, were embroiled in a rivalry between two bootlegging gangs that resulted in the premeditated murder of two men.
According to the court records, the gangsters had planned the murder in advance and had procured sticks, swords, knives and iron rods to that end. After beating up the duo, who belonged to another gang, they buried the victims alive. The victims died of suffocation."

GS - Bootlegging is quite the problem here, which is especially interesting in that, as an Islamic country, you are technically not supposed to be drinking alcohol anyway. This is why all the bars are attached to western hotels. That said, there are liquor stores where you can go buy alcohol, although you're supposed to have a license to buy it. Anyway, there is quite the bootlegging war going on, and I just wish we had Sergio Leone to film Once Upon a Time in Dubai.

Beliefs hinder treatment of mental illness in UAE

Most patients refer to spiritual healers since families associate condition with religious faults

"Dubai - Age-old beliefs hinder peoper treatment of some mental cases in the UAE, opined experts in mental health.
A conference of specialists in the field revealed during a discussion on Saturday that most patients suffering from mental illnesses refer to spiritual healers because their families diagnose and associate their conditions with religious faults.
"This is a sensitive issue, but in our (Emirati) culture, many tend to turn to healers for mental cases because they think it may have something to do with being possessed by bad devils, having weak faith in God or being affected by black magic.
The healers are usually their first option but when they 'fail' to treat the patient, they come to us for treatment, but by that time, the condition of the patient becomes more unstable," said Dr. Khawla Ahmed, Senior Specialist Psychiatrist at Rashid Hospital, Dubai Health Authority.
She added that most families choose to keep the topic under wrap out of conservativeness and family members do not address mental illness as an actual medical condition.
"We want to raise awareness and we want people to know that mental illness is a serious issue here in the UAE. No one is immune to mental illness. It can affect anybody. We want people to realise that there is no shame in talking about these kinds of illnesses and to be open about it," she said."

GS - Another one of those articles that shows the amazing balancing act between the traditional and the modern that goes on every day in the UAE. Obviously, it's not that different than the view that was the norm not that long ago in the U.S. - or, for that matter, the view that is held in some circles in the U.S. today. The very fact that the issue is being addressed so publicly, and receiving major media coverage, also shows that the perceptions that the "west" have of the Arabic world are way too simplistic.

Jack and Jack Jack

2011-10-11T21:00:00.000-07:00

Let me post a picture of one of my favorite people in the world, Jack Kelly. Here's a bit of photo-shopping that displays Jack's real nature. He's the middle child of my great friends Mike and Jame Kelly and he is a holy terror. We lovingly refer to the Kelly brood as The Barbarians for a reason, and Jack is the most barbarian. Mike, after some analysis, placed the over/under on number of stitches that Jack will receive by age 18 at 41 - I bet the over. One time Mike and I were playing with the boys down in the common room at Quarry Hill. Jack picked up a ball to throw to his older brother Nick, and in the process of throwing it he lost his balance, stumbled back three steps, fell, and hit his head on the one table in the room. It could not be explained by our understanding of physics and/or anatomy, and Mike and I just stared at each other in amazement. Only Jack Jack could find the one table in the room to collapse into. Another time I was watching Jack and his older brother while Mike and Jame were running errands with Sam, the youngest. At one point Mike called and asked how things were going. I had to admit that things were going great, and that there had only been a little blood (Jack, in the process of wrestling for a tennis ball, had fallen face first into a railing and bloodied his nose). Mike responded, without ever hearing the story or having the victim identified, "Another day in the life of Jack Kelly." I always refer to Jack as the Nature Boy, in honor of his Ric Flair like hair. Woooooooo!

Sheikh Zayed Grand Mosque

2011-10-09T04:31:00.000-07:00

Finally, I am getting around to posting pictures from our trip a couple weeks ago to visit the stunningly beautiful Shaikh Zayed Grand Mosque. As the old saying goes, a picture is worth a thousand words so I won't sully the images by blathering on. Suffice it to say it is extraordinary. I think the mosque is either the second or third largest in the world, and the central courtyard can hold thousands of worshippers.

Here are a couple pictures of the Remnants, who were still fairly new to each other at the time. The mosque is very welcoming to non-Muslims. Most Islamic countries usually have one mosque which is open to the folks of other faiths, and this is the case with the Shaikh Zayed Mosque (named in honor of the country's founder). Women have to cover their hair, as is the case with all mosques, but this one takes it a step further and asks you to don an abaya if you are showing too much skin. Liane is a very experienced traveller and was dressed very conservatively, but there are clearly differences in the definition of conservative between New Zealand and the United Arab Emirates. I liked the fact that in this mosque if men were dressed inappropirately they were asked to put on a traditional dishdash.

There were several things which I found really amazing. One was the central courtyard, and not simply because it was so huge. The marble was almost unnaturally cool to the touch, which is a great gift considering that it is so hot in the Emirates and all worshippers must kneel on the ground. Most of the surfaces were decorated with designs formed by inlaid stones, which was much like the Taj Mahal. The mosque has the largest handwoven carpet in the world, and if you look closely at the carpet you can see the lines that are included to help the worshippers who are inside line up correctly. The use of nature themes is very common in Islamic iconography because of the prohibition on the representation of the human form. The chandeliers are some of the world's largest, if not the largest. Around to the back in a quite corner is the actual tomb of the beloved Sheikh Zayed. It is very simple and wonderfully understated, and almost reminds me of the even smaller tomb of the Mughal ruler Aurengzeb in India. It is a beautiful mosque and a must see for anyone visiting Abu Dhabi.

It also reminded me of my first trip to Jordan and my visit to the King Abdullah Mosque there with the most amazing group of friends. It immediately made me think of my great friend Faith (or Fa'Ith) from Kansas City, who, popping up much like a jinn, contacted me out of the blue shortly thereafter (which was a remarkably pleasant surprise).

Being both very spiritual and more than a bit of a pantheist, I tend to have very moving experiences in all sorts of places, both inside of mosques/temples/cathedrals and out. That said, I have a very special place in my heart for mosques. While the Sheikh Zayed Grand Mosque is pretty ornate, it still has, at its heart, a simplicity that really appeals to me. As we were leaving I made my way out to the center of the massive courtyard and just soaked it all in.

Quest for Chicken Wings

2011-10-09T03:52:00.000-07:00

Not since I heroically traversed the wilds of the Silk Road in western China in pursuit of a cheeseburger has my life had such purpose. This time I am tracking down authentic chicken wings. It took a couple weeks and several cities in the Great Cheeseburger Hunt, and it make take as long here. My first attempt was at the Captain's Arms on Friday, when Tony, Peter and I took the excellent Rafael out for fish & chips. Since none of them had actually had chicken wings, and, frankly, scoffed at the idea, I made it my goal to bend them to my will (sort of like the donkey wine adventure in China, but that is another story). Eventually they gave way and the chicken wings were fairly tasty, although they didn't have buffalo sauce. I may have to wait until a return trip to Burlington next summer before I am successful. And speaking of which, I don't know who is going to take my place in the chicken wings for charity competition this year. I'm sure the Gentlemen of Excellence will field a team and continue our support of the homeless shelter. Now, if they would move the event from Super Bowl Sunday to earlier in the season . . .

Typical Abu Dhabi Scene

2011-10-08T10:05:00.000-07:00

Let me just post a quick picture, mainly because it is very representative of life in the UAE. As part of our trip down to the bank today, and to reward ourselves for a job well done (at least we can hope so), we stopped at the Brauhaus for a quick beer. We were sitting in the bar when Peter looked outside and said, essentially, what the bloody hell is that? There is a huge construction project right across the creek - the creek which used to feature a quite little beach right outside the Rotana Hotel (where the Brauhaus is situated). Not any more. The bartender said he thought it was a couple hotels and maybe a hospital, but he wasn't really certain. Neither Peter nor Tony had been there in a couple years, and the last they had seen it there was a little dock where you could go swimming.

Success, Maybe, I Hope

2011-10-08T07:39:00.000-07:00

OK, another Saturday, another trip down to HSBC bank in my epic quest to do something as simple as open an account - and something not so simple: wiring money back home. Some successes, theoretically: 1) wiring 25,000 AED (dirhams) back to my bank in Burlington. Syed, the very nice young Pakistani gentleman who was helping me asked if I wanted to send $25,000 back, and I could only reply, "I wish." Now, again theoretically, I could do this all online less expensively, but I like the idea of a bank official doing it and me having an official record. Even though I wired the money today (and put it in the bank a week ago, and was originally paid on 27 September) because of various holidays across two countries the funds might not make my account until Thursday - so I still have to wait to see if it works. 2) Raising the online limit for me to wire my own funds from 3680 AED ($1000) to 35,000 AED (an amount I will probably never actually wire, but I had to put something) - again, until I actually try and wire funds online myself, which I may never do, I won't know the success of this venture either. 3) Take money out of an ATM with my new HSBC debit card. This proved the easiest, with the exception that I had to choose a 6 digit PIN, which I had trouble wrapping my brain around since I have always had 4 digit PINs. It led to this question - so then I can't use this debit card in the US or Europe? The answer - of course, the ATMs in the US and Europe will just stop reading after four digits and all will be OK. Yeah, right. Still, it seems like a successful day. . .

Wet Headed Stranger

2011-10-05T22:28:00.000-07:00

I'm going to borrow a story from my most excellent friend Trish, who is enjoying her Fulbright year at the University of Jordan. We swap emails daily on the trials and tribulations of the ex-pat existence, and, unlike mine, hers are always funny and insightful. She joined a local gym and goes to work out every morning, partially because she is a physical fitness fiend and also for the hot showers (sort of the same experience I had in India). Anyway, she would always leave the gym and walk home without drying her hair. Now, we're in the Middle East, so getting your hair to dry outside is not a problem. Trish never dried her hair because she is very dedicated to environmental issues and realized early on that hair dryers are really bad for the environment - one of those luxuries that we really should avoid. However, she noticed that people stared at her, many frankly unpleasantly, all the way home. She told the story to a couple of her fellow Fulbrighters with more experience in the area and they were amused/horrified. Apparently in Jordan if a woman is walking around outside with wet hair everyone assumes it is because she has just finished shagging some man; so, wet hair equals questionable virtue (which certainly does not apply to Trish). This left Trish with a real quandry, but in the end she decided to start using the hair dryer at the gym to avoid an uproar in the neighborhood. I told her that this should serve as a case study in ethics or international relations classes. Later I was telling the story to my friends here, and half-way through they started giving me these very knowing smiles. So, I asked, does this mean that there is the same societal view here in the Emirates? My friend Liane laughed and said, "oh yeah, total whore." It's funny the odd little societal rules that you pick up, some of which are pretty obvious and others of which are more complex and mysterious and often unfathomable.

Groan

2011-10-03T22:46:00.000-07:00

OK, so I spoke too soon in my wild self-congratulatory posting on opening an HSBC account. I spent a couple hours online and on the phone last night trying to wire funds back to my account in the US, and not only failed majestically but also unleashed the first appearance of the epic Scudder temper on the poor folks of the Emirates. First off, the website was completely convoluted and it took a better part of an hour simply to register for online banking. Then it was really difficult to figure out how to wire money online (which was really the entire point of starting the account anyway). So, I did the responsible thing, and decidedly anti-male thing, and called for help. The woman in the call center told me that first we had to figure out what my transfer "limit" was - and at that point I knew it was going to be a bumpy night. According to her my transfer limt - that is, the amount of MY money that I could transfer was 3680 dirhams. Now, if you factor in that the official set exchange rate between dirhams to dollars is 3.67, you can see where this is headed. Essentially,I am not allowed to wire more than $1000. Of course, I can up the limit, but it is not a change that can be made at the HSBC website itself. Wait for it . . . you have to run off a form, fill it out, and then take it to the bank (yes, the bank that is an hour away) to make the change. Beyond the fact that this requires yet another trip downtown, it also makes you wonder how truly secure the website is if they include that many hoops to jump through. What I will probably end up doing, in addition to filling out the form and taking it to the main branch, is just go ahead and have someone there at the bank wire the money while I am sitting there (and doubtless refusing to move until it is completed - and those who have witnessed my infamous temper are probably cringing at this moment). All of this, of course, sort of defeats the purpose of "internet banking" in the first place. Groan. It would actually be easier to just have Zayed cut me a check, cash it at their local bank branch, and take the bloody money to Western Union. Opening a bank account, especially in a multi-national bank, was supposed to make life easier, and also give me more financial roots if I decide to stay here. The thought of all the work I did to set up direct deposit, so that I can in turn drive to the bank to take the money out, just makes my head hurt.

Success, I Think

2011-10-01T22:31:00.000-07:00

Success! Well, at least I can dream. Tony, Peter, Liane and I made our way downtown on Saturday morning to take care of our banking needs. As is always the case here, it really was more difficult than it needed to be. First off Tony and I had to go to the DHL office to pick up our new bank credit and debit cards, that the "delivery" company could not deliver. It was pretty painless, although at a certain point Tony blew up and stormed out. It's very rare that I'm the sensible, patient one, but it gave me the chance to revel in the role. After that they wanted to go to a local branch of the Union Bank, which is the bank Zayed uses, to cash their checks, and they dropped me off at HSBC where I was going to put my check in the bank. This should have been simple, but it wasn't. I went up to the quick help counter at the front and asked the best way to put the check in the bank. The woman, who could not have been more pleasant, walked me over to the machines where you can deposit the check automatically, while discussing the fact that the machines are a wonder of the age. After swiping the check three times we discovered that the wonder of the age couldn't actually read it, and I was sent upstairs to the special Advance section (which I qualified for) because it would be quicker - there was a big queue downstairs. So, upstairs I went, to wait in another big queue, although one featuring Advance customers. There was probably a dozen different special desks for all sorts of amazing banking options, but only one person who was actually working as a teller. So, I took a number and waited, and called the Remnants to tell them to go ahead and take care of their banking and we'd meet later. A half-hour later I was finally able to get my check in the bank - and the long, national nightmare was at an end. Having said that, I'll believe it when I actually see the money in my account and have direct deposit works and successfully wire funds home. I calmed my nerves with a cooling iced mocha at the Seattle's Best Coffee shop in the lobby of the bank.

After that we drove over to the Abu Dhabi Mall because everyone had to do a little shopping. I bought a DVD player because I'm having serious withdrawl pains for lack of movies. Amazingly, it actually works and I knocked off the first two episodes of season one of Deadwood. I loved the Ian McShane character Al Swearengen on the show - we have a lot in common.

After buying my DVD player I ditched the others and met my friend Kate O'Neill and her brother Chris at the Brauhaus restaurant at the Rotana Beach Hotel, which is attached to the mall. I had not seen the two of them for a couple years so it was great getting caught up. Kate teaches with me here at Zayed but actually grew up in Burlington, Vermont. She came over ten years ago and eventually her brother followed her, and they have both flourished. After eating we walked back to the mall to meet her husband Scott and her three boys, who are all big gentle brutes (sort of older, more civilized versions of Mike Kelly's barbarians). The two older ones remembered me from a previous visit and that was really great. I love kids and it was fun to spend some time with them (and I suspect that baby-sitting duties may pop up in the future). Oh, and the food at the Brauhaus was very good, although the fried meatloaf with an egg on top ended up essentially being Spam with an egg on time (it reminded me of the Monty Python sketch).

Ahhh, the Weekend

2011-09-30T22:43:00.000-07:00

One of the peculiarities of the relationship between the Christian and Islamic weekends is that, even though they are "reversed," Saturday ends up having the same purpose in both versions. As I've been blogging about since the world was young, I've been trying to finalize the establishment of a bank account (which should not be this bloody hard). Today, Saturday, a group of us are heading down to actually, insh'allah, put money in the bank. This will be my third to the bank, not counting the dozens of emails, phone calls and texts. Anyway, I'm heading down today because the banks in the Islamic world are closed on Friday, obviously, just as they are closed on Sunday in the Christian world. That leaves Saturday in both worlds when the bank is open half a day, so we're heading down this morning. That left yesterday for general goofing off, and it was a really nice day. After grabbing a big breakfast - Friday is the only day of the week where I don't just eat fruit, yogurt and mueslix - I worked out for a couple hours and then plopped down by the pool. My friend Liane suggested that we head downtown because she wanted to do some shopping, although I think we were mainly interested in getting off the island. Living at the Radisson Blu out here on Yas Island is pretty sweet, but it is very easy to fall into a routine/rut, and I'm determined to make a more concerted effort to change things up. Anyway, Liane and I caught the 2:00 Radisson shuttle downtown and bounced around the Abu Dhabi Mall for a couple hours, and she was successful in finding some clothes and shoes (as expressed in the picture of her reveling in her purchases).

I did find one of her shirt purchases buried in the back of a rack, so I think I more than justified my existence. After that we caught a cab over to the Intercontinental Hotel to go to the Belgian Cafe, which our friend Tanya swears is the best bar in Abu Dhabi. Here in the UAE it is very rare to find a free-standing bar, not surprisingly, so almost every bar is located in a major western hotel, and the Belgian is no exception. It was a nice place, featuring, as you might expect, Belgian beer and food. We had the Hoegaarden white beer and some prawns, which were really good. After that we caught a taxi all the way out to Yas Island, and it only cost around $18, which I've spent to take a taxi from the Burlington Airport to Shelburne, so that was OK (although I always flash back to the pennies I spent to taxis in India and it seems like a fortune). We met up with the other Remnants for our usual happy hour at the Radisson, and then Tanya, Liane and I walked next door to the Park Hotel to eat at their Mexican restaurant, which was expensive (this is Abu Dhabi, after all) but quite good. And then I collapsed into bed. It was really nice to get out and do something different, although it has left me exhausted. Now, if only the banking excursion is half as successful.

The Ghost Walks

2011-09-27T03:34:00.000-07:00

It's payday, which is always a nice feeling - especially for my numerous creditors. And, I actually have a local bank to deposit the funds, at least until wiring them back to the Vermont Federal Credit Union, and then sent on electronically to various and sundry companies. It's amazing how all of these things are carried out electronically, or at least amazing to an utter luddite such as myself. Some of my friends, and especially Mike Lange, desire to have as small an internet presence as possible (although not all of them, like Mike, do it because of their role in the witness protection program). I played hooky from Zayed yesterday - although, to be fair, I didn't have any classes or scheduled meetings, so I can't claim any serious measure of profligacy. I caught the 290 bus, which runs from right in front of the hotel cluster out on Yas Island and deposits you downtown. It cost 2 dirhams (about 60 cents) to ride the new, air-conditioned bus for an hour. Surprisingly, I actually remembered where to get off (right at Zayed the 1st Street) and made it to my bank, the local HSBC branch. While I was sitting around waiting to talk to the excellent Imtiaz Shaheedi, I had one of those cool foreign travel moments. The second floor waiting area was very clean, air-conditioned (thank god) and "western", with the exception of a couple things. First off, there was the large, elaborate and authentic Arabic coffee pot, with matching small cups, on the table. Someone would walk up occasionally to ask if I wanted some coffee, and then pour it if the answer was yes. Secondly, while I was killing time I looked at the information screen and saw the following message crawl across the bottom: "Interested in Shariah Compliant Financial Solutions?" When I filled out the paperwork to set up the account in the first place (over two weeks ago) I had the choice of selecting Islamic banking or "regular" banking. Since I chose "regular" banking I wasn't necessariloy looking for Shariah Compliant Financial Solutions, but it has become one of my favorite phrases. Imtiaz took care of all the paperwork and apparently I now have an account, although we he sent me the information last night it was devoured by the Champlain College filter, so I still don't really know anything about the account that I have - other than I have one, or at least I think I have one - and now a check!! The summer I taught in India I just was paid with large wads of rupees, so I never actually had a check - so this is a new thing. I guess I could add it to my list of 50 new things, which I'm supposed to be creating so that my good friend Trish will stop pestering me. She's doing this mainly to humiliate me because her 52 New Things - and her latest 50 New Things in Jordan - have become cultural touchstones. But more on that later.

After finishing up at the bank I walked to the Abu Dhabi Mall, which is where I was schedule to meet the shuttle, several hours later, that would take me back to Yas Island. While killing time in the posh mall I reveled in western consumerism - grabbing lunch at McDonald's (and a Big Mac meal cost exactly the same as it does in the US), ice cream at Coldstone (although they didn't have my favorite, the Boston Creme confectionary ice cream extravaganza) and a latte at Starbuck's (I chose it to take advantage of their wifi, which didn't come together because they charged for it - I guess I was thinking of Chinese Starbuck's which featured free wifi). I also had to do some shopping. In the chaos that was my trip planning/packing, I managed to leave with only four dress shirts, and one of which, my favorite, really is pretty threadbare, and has since arriving lost a pivotal button - so I was forced to guy a couple shirts. Well, the Abu Dhabi Mall was not a particularly good location for such a venture, at least for a poor professor. In every clothing store I entered a regular button-down shirt cost between $150-$200. Now, my friend Alfonso Capone, who is bit of a clothes-horse, tells me that this is a perfectly legitimate price to pay for a shirt, but I guess it's the Hoosier in me - I just couldn't do it. So, I walked into every shop until I found one with a 75% off sale, and ended up buying a couple nice shirts for around $30 a piece. So, in the end it was a success. The Radisson Blu shuttle arrived on time, and off I skated to home.

Now, I'll still have to travel back downtown on Saturday to deposit the check (the direct deposit won't be set up until time for the October payday), but I'm definitely making progress. Next goals: Emirati ID card and Emirati/International driver's license.

A Craptacular Day Redeemed

2011-09-24T06:47:00.000-07:00

I'm still adjusting to the different weekends, and I was determined to use today to get downtown and run some very necessary errands, but also stop by the Captain's Arms for fish & chips. Unfortunately, it all fell apart. I was grabbing a quick workout this morning when the very rep at my bank called me to tell me that there was a problem in attemptint go finalize my opening of a bank account at HSBC. First off, I have to admit that I really appreciate that the guy went out of his way to actually do some homework in advance and call me to tell me about a potential problem, as compared to me showing up downtown and then finding out (which is what would have undoubtedly happened at an American bank, especially a Vermont bank). What is annoying is that I began to process of trying to set up a bank account two weeks ago and I was really hoping to finish it today. I couldn't complete the process two weeks ago because I didn't have a local phone (since remedied) and didn't have my passport (Zayed had it as they tried to finalize my resident visa). The passport showed up this week, and so I thought, foolishly, that everything could be locked down today. Essentially the problem today was that my original salary letter from Zayed, which you have to have to open a bank account, had "expired." For some reason it was written on 17 August, two weeks before I arrived in Abu Dhabi. So, I need to get another salary letter, and then make another trip downtown to open the bank account (not to be confused with the trip I have to make downtown to actually put money in the bank, of course). Not surprisingly this put me in a remarkably foul mood and I ended up deciding not to ride downtown with the Remnants because my enthusiasm for life in the UAE had reached an early nadir. Instead, I did the only logical thing a person in that bad of a mood could do - I sat out by the pool, and alternated between swimming, drinking cool mint drinks, tanning, reading, and eating a club sandwich. My mood eventually improved, and I may, may, actually be fit for polite company again. Still, it simply shouldn't be that difficult to set up a bloody bank account. Oddly, I guess I wouldn't mind this so much if it were happening in India or Kenya, but the ultra-modern veneer of the UAE fools you into thinking that these things should be easy. Now, no one is generally more culturally sensitive than I am - or more accepting of different "times" (Arab time, Indian time, Africa time - as my Arab, Indian and African friends always kid about) - but there is a time when it is not simply a case of differing cultural timelines. Sometimes it truly is incompetence.

The Sacred and the Secular

2011-09-21T22:11:00.000-07:00

Here's a really beautiful painting created by a female student at the Dubai campus of Zayed University. I made my first of what will undoubtedly be weekly visits to the Dubai campus yesterday (more on that later) and had the privilege of seeing this picture. It is hanging in the office of my good friend Jyoti Grewal, who is also the dean of University College, and who is my boss (as much as I ever have a boss, I suppose). Every year Zayed hosts a women's conference and this painting was displayed. Apparently Jane Fonda loved it and wanted to buy it, but the artist refused and instead gave it to Jyoti because she was her favorite teacher (which says a lot about the power of teacher - as Henry Adams reminded us, a teacher impacts eternity because you can never tell where her/his influence ends). On the long drive back to Abu Dhabi (about an hour and a half) I had lots of time to think about the painting, and, not surprisingly, I had several different thoughts about it. First off, it is beautiful and speaks to the fact that the lives of women in the Islamic/Arabic world are much more complicated than we think they are. Secondly, however, it made me think what the response of Muslims would be if we dramatized some of their iconic images. Now, of course, Jesus is every bit as much a part of the Islamic tradition as he is the Christian tradition, so the distinction between the two is very artificial, and one we make in the "West" all the time (even the use of the term West as distinct from the Arabic/Islamic world is in and of itself a very arbitrary distinction. Plus, it could be argued that this is not an artistic commentary on Jesus, but rather one on an iconic artistic image. The other side of this is, of course, that we "started it" because we were the ones who "commodified" (although I'm currently embroiled in a discussion with my good friend Steve Wehmeyer on this topic) religion in the first place - at least in regards to the representation of our Christian religious figures in a secular setting. If anything, it is the Islamic world that has not changed in that regards; at least not changed in a radical, revolutionary way. One of the constant themes of the blogs since I arrived is the slow, almost imperceptible, evolutionary nature of societal change here - but change nonetheless. Just the creation and celebration of this work of art shows how the world is changing.

Captain's Arms

2011-09-20T04:10:00.000-07:00

And here are a few pictures of the very cool pub that we visited while on a driving tour of downtown Abu Dhabi on Saturday. The high point was unquestionably the Sheikh Zayed Grand Mosque (worthy of a very lengthy post or two later), which was awe-inspiring, but ending up at a little English pub in a quiet, tree-lined little courtyard was a pretty fantastic way to end the day. As it turns out it is really easy to get there because the Radisson Blu has a shuttle that runs downtown to the Abu Dhabi Mall repeatedly throughout the day, and once you're at the mall it is probably around a two block walk to the pub itself (even I could pull it off). I suspect that this is going to be a regular Saturday event. Now, to be fair, it, like almost everything in Abu Dhabi is expensive - as I pointed out a couple posts it did cost around $30 for fish & chips and one beer, but I think I can treat myself occasionally. In fact, I would say this Saturday. My passport actually arrived safe and sound this afternoon, complete with my Emirati visa (which, mysteriously enough, is good through 2014, which may be part of Jyoti's scheme to lock me up for three years), which means I can go to HSBC and complete the process of setting up my bank account. Oh, and one final note - you have to love the happy hour sign. As my good friend Mike Kelly opined, "the hours are right."

Where Am I? (more specifically)

2011-09-20T03:16:00.000-07:00

And here's another map that I found in a ZU glossy. The first map is an overview of the new Abu Dhabi campus. At the top is the beautiful auditorium with the administration building right below it. Then there is the courtyard, which is now sitting sadly vacant while the school decides what to do with the space. My theory is that they will add darkened glass to the space in the library that is overlooking the huge central courtyard and it will open up later in the year. Once the weather completedly breaks, and it has already started, the kids will be trying to tear down the walls to get outside. It is a really delicate cultural dance, and I do think that the administration here is doing the right thing in being sensitive to the more conservative parents. In the US we are used to revolutionary change; here in the UAE we're moving along at a more evolutionary pace. The key point is that they are still moving, and moving too fast, as history has shown us time and time again, usually has the opposite impact. Below the courtyard is the main female and male wings of the campus - the female on the left (where my classes are) and the male is on the right (where my office is). Below that is the library, which also has female and male floors and a segregated schedule for the common spaces. The second picture of a close-up with a few of my own clumsy notes added. I suspect I'm probably doing this more for my benefit than anybody else's, but I like to post maps to give a sense of the spacial structure. This place is huge. I went to an orientation session the other day and found out that the male population at Zayed is up to 19%, up from 9% last year, so things are definitely changing. It wwas also interesting to learn that 20% of the students are 18 and younger, with the other 80% being in the more traditional 19-24 range.

Reflections on Things at Hand: A Tuesday

2011-09-19T23:44:00.000-07:00

By 10:00 a.m. today I realized that it was just going to be one of those odd days, so I devoted a Reflections on Things at Hand (one of my recurring features) just to the morning.

Today must be insane shoe day at Zayed. I have seen more fashionable/scandalous high heels shoes today than one would normally see in the States in a season. I've talked before about the amazing creativity that the students use when adapting the abaya, as a way to upholding tradition but also expressing individuality. This especially shows itself in regards to shoes, and especially high hells. My favorite of the day was from a young woman wearing a very conservative abaya and hijab, with none of the fashionable additions that they create, who was also wearing the most eye-catching red shoes with what must have been four inch heels. Beyond the fashion disconnect, I'm just amazed at the skill required to walk in them.

My other favorite fashion moment of the day related to a young woman who was sporting a cut-away abaya. Often the students will just leave the abaya open in the front, where it almost looks like a cross between a cape and and an academic robe (think Harry Potter). Lately I've seen several girls with the lower part of the abaya, just in the front, cut away. It works to emphasize what are normally a pair of skin-tight stone-washed jeans. Today the cut-away abaya bracketed a pair of remarkably loose/slouchy pajama pants and moccasins. Fascinating. The thing is that once the girls are in class the vast majority of them are very serious students, and they leave the fashion mentality out in the promenade.

Oh, and walking back into the male wing after office hours I saw one of the boys using a match to light a pipe, inside the building. I have no idea what that was about. I suspect that just as with the high heels and the stone-washed jeans and the pajama pants, it was just fashion.

Queueing Up for Petrol

2011-09-19T09:24:00.001-07:00

On the way home from school today we finally had to stop and put some gas in the car. That turned out to be quite the adventure because we headed out a way that we didn't normally go, and our 20 minute drive turned into an hour drive, but getting the gas itself was pretty painless. There was a pretty long queue, which we figured related to the paucity of gas station as compared to the lack of any petroleum in the UAE. We ended up paying 1.61 dirhams per liter, which, if my math is correct, works out to $1.66 per gallon. Many of my friends back in the States were pretty horrified by how low it was (although it is apparently much cheaper in neighboring Saudia Arabic, as you might expect). I did have to admit to people that it tends to balance out, in that I paid $30 for fish & chips and one beer at a cool bar downtown over the weekend (which I'll blog about later). I also paid $30 for a cheesburger and one Coke in Dubai once time, although the burger did have an egg on top and was potentially the best burger I ever had in my entire life.

Hitting My Stride, Sort Of

2011-09-18T03:37:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting here on a Sunday afternoon holding my office hours in the main promenade of the female wing, between Magrudy's bookstore and the coffee stand. Note to self: avoid blueberry muffin in the future, Starbucks it ain't. As I've discussed, since I teach in the female wing but have an office in the male wing it is impossible for my students to visit my office. So, I have started holding my office hours out in the main promenade. I posted a picture of the area a few posts back. It looks like the poshest mall you can imagine. The first floor is reserved for shops (yet to be filled, with the exception of Magrudy's) and the second and third floors feature offices and classrooms. To me it's cool to sit out here just to watch the parade of female students and the infinite variety of fashion statements that one can make with an abaya (which I've discussed before). Today I saw the first girl (forgive the use of the terms boy and girl - it's a cultural thing, I don't know anyone at Zayed who says women or men) with colored hair - a streak of blonde. It is rather amazing. I saw three girls on the same bench today: one was covered from head to toe in very familiar fashion, another who were her hijab just like a scarf and who had a colored border on her abaya and what must have been four inches heels on her red high heels, and one who wore her abaya completely open to display her punk rock t-shirt, faded jeans and hi-top Keds. Apparently there is a big move towards a short and sassy bob cut, as compared to the usual fascination with long hair.

I had two great classes today, which for any teacher make our day. As my good friend Alfonso Capone always opines, as long as things are going well in class it doesn't matter what buffoonery the administration is cooking up. I'm starting to get a better sense of the students and what I can expect. I'm really pushing them to analyze material and not just write down what I say and rely upon wrote memorization (which is very much in the tradition that they've experienced up to this point). In my 8:00 class we started to discuss World War I and we had a wonderful discussion. The really liked the poetry of the common soldiers as well as the propaganda posters. When I showed them the famous poster of the little girl sitting on her father's lap and asking, "Daddy, what did you do during the Great War?" they had a very tangible reaction - I suspect because they in turn wrap their fathers around their own little fingers. They did say that they thought that it was unfair to take that approach to shaming young men into fighting, which is good because I want them to understand the very human nature of the conflict and how it changed an entire generation. My 13:00 class is getting ready to start on the Aztecs, although I included a tour around Central and South America to examine, briefly, the Olmecs, Mayans, Moche, Nazca and Incas, just so they'd know that the Aztecs didn't exist in a vacuum. We were bruting our way through a reading from the Mayan epic the Popol Vuh, which they initially thought was stupid but eventually grow to like. We read the section where the first hero twins of the story, One Hunahpu and Seven Hunahpu, were killed by the lords of the underworld, and One Hunahpu's head was tossed in a calabash tree. Then a young virginal maiden, Lady Blood, came to see the amazing sight, only to have the skull spit into her hand and impregnate her, which led her father to order her taken off and killed, and her heart brought back to prove that she was dead (and she substituted a heart made from tree sap, which fooled the gods). The students did a great job digging into the analysis of what might have been going on. First off, two of them pointed out that they have the same story in the Quran, the story of the virgin birth of Maryam (Mary in the Christian tradition). Secondly, they pulled out the obvious Snow white reference (although they were wigged to find out that the story is very old and not a creation of a writer at Walt Disney a few decades ago). Finally, and most importantly, they culled out that it was the interplay between the Mayan priest telling the story orally to a Spanish priest, and then having the story go through Latin and Spanish versions, which might have led to the fusing together of the different versions. I was very proud of their effort and things are starting to come together very nicely.

Oh, and I brought my 8:00 class cookies this morning to apologize for being late on the first day (when my classroom was changed at the last moment). It seemed only fair since I demand that they bring me cookies or cupcakes if they are late. And speaking of which, while I was sitting here typing away a student walked up and gave me a cookie and apologized for being late last week.

Changing Face of Abu Dhabi

2011-09-17T09:16:00.000-07:00

I have an absolutely lovely day today that will require several posts to chronicle. Tony, Liane, Peter and I drove downtown Abu Dhabi for the day, which was quite the challenge because it is both completely torn up and also very different than Peter and Tony remembered. We didn't know if Liane was going to make it or not because she was out fairly late at the Beady Eye concert last night, which was literally a five minute walk from our hotel. Yas Island holds a series of concerts once the weather breaks and this was the first. Rafael, the amazing waiter/bartender/conscierge who dominates happy hour ar the Radisson scored us free tickets, even though I begged off - although I have my name in already for Metallica, who are coming in a couple months. Anyway, as part of the trip we both drove out to the point of land past the Marina Mall which gave us a great view of part of downtown (there are big buildings going up everywhere, and this, the second picture down, is just one little corner). We also made it to the insanely posh Emirates Palace Hotel, which has a deal with the British Museum which allows for rotating exhibits actually in the hotel itself. There was also a shop where you could, literally, buy actual artwork such as Tang three-color statues or Moche pottery. I'm not talking about souvenir reproductions - I'm talking about the real deal. I gues if you can afford to stay there you can buy artifacts. I was really taken by a Tang dynasty three-color camel and a Moche pottery of a crouching corpse - my birthday is in early January - I'm just saying. Anyway, the Mesopotamia exhibit had just closed but there was a new exhibit focusing on the work being done on Saadiyat Island, which is the island that will host the new cultural center. Part of this complex will feature the branch museums of the Guggenheim and the Louvre that I mentioned the other day. Sadly, they're just beginning construction so, even considering how quickly things are put up around here, I don't think it will be completed before my year is up. Now, if I stayed . . . Here are the pictures - the top is a few shots from the exhibit of Abu Dhabi in the 1950's when Sheikh Zayed took over, then there's a nice skyline of today, and then the last shot is a model of the Saadiyat Island complex. The mass of bizarre geometic shapes at the bottom is the Guggenheim, right above it, and looking like an extraterrestial/aquatic version of Captain America's shield is the Louvre, and above that, and looking an albino whale crawling back towards the water, is the new performing arts center. These folks dream very big.

Aspirin

2011-09-16T06:59:00.000-07:00

The UAE, both Abu Dhabi and Dubai, are famous for their, to say the least, unique architecture. I'm sure this is not the only picture I'll be posting. This is a building that I pass every day on the way to work - and whose outline I can see from my balcony at night - which the ex-pats lovingly refer to as The Aspirin. I think it houses the Emirati organization that overseas all building projects or something like that. I always have this fantasy that someday I'll look up and it will have worked its way loose from its foundation and gone rolling across the desert.

Where Am I?

2011-09-16T06:43:00.000-07:00

I won't bore people with a map of where the UAE is located or where Abu Dhabi is inside of the UAE. Both are in the news enough that everybody already knows that. However, I did find a nice little map of where the new Abu Dhabi campus is located inside a glossy book that all the new Zayed hires received. If you look to the far left that is downtown, and that is where the old Abu Dhabi campus used to be, and, truthfully, where I was hoping I'd end up. That said, once you see where the new campus is you can see the logic of where I'm located. Head to the right of the page about 2/3 of the way and you will find the new campus, just below Khalifa City A. There's not much around it now, although the city will doubtless and catch it soon. Now, look up to your upper right hand corner and you'll find Yas Island, where I'm exiled at the Radisson Blu. There's not a lot there at the moment, although in a year, according to the plans I've seen, the place will be jumping. Right now it's only about a fifteen minute drive in, as compared to the forty-five minutes to an hyour commute that I'd be facing if I lived downtown. So, it is a bit of a conundrum. For now I guress I'm perfectly fine bunking at the Radisson. Oh, and just a bit of info - if you look back to the upper left hand corner you see the tip of the island which will soon house the Louvre and Guggenheim branch museums.

ZU Beauty Parlor

2011-09-14T09:43:00.000-07:00

OK, I've cut and pasted an announcement that went around on ZU mail yesterday. It dealt with the grand opening of the new beauty parlor on the Dubai campus. Apparently we're going to get our own out here on the Abu Dhabi campus as well. This was a major bone of contention with the Abu Dhabi students last year - they hated the fact that their colleagues in Dubai could go the beauty parlor while on campus and they couldn't. I passed it around to many of my female friends at Champlain who, after tossing out a few disparaging remarks, did take note of the special reserved time every day for faculty and staff. The entire concept is an interesting one and relates to the whole dress code issue at Zayed. On the surface the wearing of the black abaya seems repressive, but it's amazing how the women turn it around and make it a statement of personal style and identity. Yes, some of them wear the abaya in a very traditional way, even down to a veil, but the vast majority of them don't. It astonishing how many of them are also sporting stiletto heels or just leave the abaya open in the front and wear it almost like a cape. The new look I noticed the other day was having the lower part in the front cut out so that the abaya actually nicely framed the stone washed jeans (and, again, the tall heels). An increasing number of the women are not wearing a scarf on their head at all, which is actually going in direct opposition to places like the University of Jordan where more and more women are wearing the hijab. The variety of ways that the abaya is, for lack of a better word, accessorized, is dizzying. I wish it were appropriate to take pictures, although I suspect that most of the women would be more than happy to have their picture taken, because the variety would change the perception that most people in the west would have. Now, that said, the interior of the university is a safe island, which, much like home, although for a different reason, allows the students a little more freedom of self-expression.

Opening Hours of Dubai Campus Beauty Salon
September 13, 2011 in Administrative, Campus Services, Dubai, Events, Featured, Student Life by Maria Kennedy

Dear All

The Refinery for Her’s opening hours are as follows:-

For Students:- The Salon opens Sunday – Thursday 8-5pm

For Faculty & Staff :- In addition to the above hours the salon will remain open from 5-7pm for faculty and staff only. Those availing of the additional hours will receive a 10% discount on all treatments

Thanks

Mariia

The Amazing Aya

2011-09-14T09:16:00.000-07:00

And here's a picture of Aya Wadi, my administrative assistant (I say my because she assures me that she works for me, although I'm certain that she must actually work for someone far more important who hasn't shown up yet - they don't give people this talented to guys like me). She's essentially the Zayed University equivalent of Darlene McGrath, and anyone at Champlain would get that reference. Aya is Palestinian, although I've yet to figure out whether she was born in the UAE or has only been here for a while. She takes care of my few requests, usually before I get around to asking for help in the first place. One of her chores is dealing with transfer issues, and since we're in the male wing of the campus it means that there is a constant queue of boys camped in her office (which is right outside mine), although I can't decide whether or not they are actually concerned with transfer credit or they just all have a crush on her. I took this picture when I discovered that Monkey had escaped from my office and was trying to get her to use her influence to get him his own suite.

First Week

2011-09-13T10:27:00.000-07:00

Ah, it must be the first week of the semester. I have a textbook, a syllabus, a class roster, and the first candy bar offered up by a student as a propitious sacrifice to the angry god for being late. I've obviously implemented the culture of intimidation already (inside joke). Anyone who knows me at Champlain knows that my rule is that you cannot come into class late without being publicly persecuted unless you bring me a cookie or a cupcake. The students here willingly and enthusiastically agreed to the stipulation and only had one question - store bought or home made. They have been absolutely wonderful so far and I'm really enjoying teaching them. One of my other traditions is handing out nicknames. If I have two students with the same name I give them nicknames to tell them apart, and the first step is always labelling one Evil "fill in the blank" or Good "fill in the blank." I told that story to my students here at Zayed, and it really struck me what a different place the Middle East is than we assume in the US when a student volunteered to be "Evil Fatima" to break the tie. Priceless.

Remnants of the British Empire

2011-09-10T10:28:00.000-07:00

Since I've mentioned them several times, I thought I'd go ahead and post pictures of my fellow ZU professors who are living out here on Yas Island at the Radisson Blu. Tony, whose picture is at the top, is British. Liane, second, is from New Zealand. Peter is another Brit. And then we have Tatja, who is from Serbia, but we've overlooked that as members of the British diaspora. They are really a lovely group and a lot of fun to hang around with. In an odd way they remind me of the absolutely wonderful group of faculty that I spent time with on my first trip to Jordan on a State Department grant back in early 2005: just very easy-going folks who don't let much bother them. They have been a tremendous resource in regards to Zayed University. As of this moment they're only supposed to be teaching this semester at Zayed, having been invited back to cover the heavier fall cohort, so none of them will probably be here come February (and more's the pity for me). As I've mentioned in previous posts, Tony and Peter invested their ZU money from earlier stays into lovely homes overseas - Portutal for Tony and Sri Lanka for Peter. In classic academic fashion, three of the four have spouses back home (we are all too many of us academic gypdies): Tony's in Portugal, Peter's in Sri Lanka, and Liane's in Belfast of all places.

There Are No Guarantees

2011-09-10T09:42:00.000-07:00

OK, so I'm channelling Ryan Adams again. Today, among a number of different chores, I did something I had not done on a trip since the summer I spent teaching in India in 2004: unpack my suitcases and put everything away. I don't know why this felt like such a big deal, but it just felt that way, and it has left me feeling pretty melancholy. Whenever I talk to anyone here I tell them that I'm only going to be here for a year, and they just give me a knowing smile in return. I suspect a lot of people come to Abu Dhabi for a year, and then stay ten. Two of the ZU professors who are staying here are back just for the semester in response to a reply from ZU - they had already put in their time teaching here and have leveraged the financial payout to own places in Portutgal and Sri Lanka. I guess I need to balance out what I have in Vermont and what I could potentially have here. And, obviously, it's not just the financial benefits of teaching in the Gulf. More important to me is the role that I could play in reshaping Zayed University. For all of my wars with the administration at Champlain I can also honestly say that it is a better place than I found it, and I could certainly walk away with a clear conscience. There are so many things I love about Vermont and Champlain, but also so many things that I just loathe. It used to be an amazing place to work, but it's simply not anymore. The question is, what role can I play in making Champlain a good school and a great place to work?

Mugg & Bean

2011-09-09T04:58:00.000-07:00

In today's coffee-crazed world I sometimes think that you measure your friends by their association to common coffeeshops. I was just reading my good friend Trish's blog, where she was writing about returning to her favorite coffee shop in Amman, Jordan. Sadly, I haven't any place as charming as hers, but at least I've tracked one down that is reasonably close to the Radisson. Mugg & Bean is a chain that you see a fair bit overseas and I went there today with Liane, my Kiwi friend and one of the ZU professors squirrelled away at the Radisson, and her friends Jen and Bruce, who teach at the Dubai campus of ZU. As it turns out I had actually met Jen before on the shuttle that runs between the two campuses, although we didn't remember it until around an hour into the discussion. It is always sobering when I meet some many folks overseas who have travelled a lot more than me, and by American standards I've travelled quite a bit (of course, since only around 15% of Americans actually have a passport I guess it's nothing to get too worked up about). Anyway, they had all sorts of suggestions about places to travel from the UAE, including some great low price carriers, even one down in Sharjah. They told me it's very easy to get to Zanzibar from here, so that trip is definitely on my radar. I'm still working out the logistics of my trip to Samarkand. My friend Mike Lange has a friend in Kabul, Afghanistan, and I'm considering the notion of a Kabul-Samarkand trip. Now that would be cool. In the meantime, however, it's just tnice to continue to meet folks and get settled. I think the Mugg & Bean might make a good weekly Saturday lunch trip.

First Weekend

2011-09-08T22:53:00.000-07:00

It's the weekend, and I slept very late. One of the peculiarities of time and cultural differences is that just about the time my friends back home are waking up on Thursday my week is essentially over and the weekend is beginning. Of course, the flip side of that is that when my friends are dragging out of bed on Sunday my week has already started and I've taught my first round of classes. I've now been here a week, although it feels like a month. I have some vague plans for the weekend: 1) need to rally and workout, 2) actually unpack and put my clothes away in drawers, 3) my Kiwi friend Liane wants me to go with her to some yet to be determined bar to watch the New Zealand team play rugby (actually sounds like a lot of fun), 4) maybe catch a taxi to the British Club tonight - a couple new friends of mine have invited me there for some celebration, and 5) my friend Tony and I are looking to catch a bus or hotel shuttle downtown tomorrow so that I can start a bank account, shop for a local phone and buy a couple clothes that I somehow didn't pack (I can remember in the midst of repacking being disgusted that I had somehow thrown four black belts into my suitcase, and then managed to somehow take them all out, and now I have none).

Life in the Desert

2011-09-08T22:47:00.000-07:00

Here's an odd little contraption that one finds in the all the hallways of the hotel. It's a little humidifier that pops on now and then. It also has a cleanser as part of the "mist." It spins around and the water gets sudsy. The weather here is odd - it's hotter than bloody hell, but we're also on the gulf so the humidity is stifling. So, you're sort of humidifying and fighting the effects of too much humidity at the same time.

Saj

2011-09-08T22:41:00.000-07:00

I found a new lunchtime treat at the campus. Normally I just grab a banana, a container of fruit, and a bottle of water at the campus (now, this may change once all the shops open up in the Promenade). In the big central areas the first floor will be reserved for restaurants and coffee shops and a beauty parlor, with the second and third floors for the classrooms and offices. Since there are so fewer men than women I'm wondering if there will be a lot more shops in the female wing than the male wing, and if there will be "gender-specific" differences (there is a sociology study waiting to be written). I load up on fruit at breakfast and lunch, knowing that "supper" will just be snacking at happy hour (and they don't have a salad bar). I broke with tradition (as much tradition as you can build up in a couple days) and tried the saj, which is a Lebanese treat. It is a wrap that is baked on a special grill - think of a two foot wide convex grill, sort of a large black contact lense - and then filled with goodies. I had the combo saj, which is cheese and some sort of very spicy spread. Absolutely delicious. It's much like an emaciated shwarma, if that makes any sense.

Monkey is Popular

2011-09-06T10:42:00.000-07:00

In my continuing, and exhausting, effort to chronicle Monkey's travels throughout the Middle East (and, truthfully, they may not have been a greater traveller in the Middle East since the time of Ibn Battuta) here's a picture of him at happy hour on the balcony of the Radisson Blu. He was swapping stories with Tony, Peter and Liane, all great story tellers, and he was holding his own. I didn't bring him tonight and they were visibly disappointed.

Good Night From the Other Side of the World

2011-09-06T10:30:00.001-07:00

In the nearly four-hundred posts that comprise this blog (is that even possible - although I can remember asking the same thing after three-hundred) th eone which arguably received the most positive feedback was a series of pictures I took and posted (without commentary) of the sun coming up over Port Elizabeth in South Africa. Let me post a few pictures of the sun going down last night. We're on Yas Island and the sun was setting back towards the Abu Dhabi, so it's not quite as romantic as if it were setting over the Persian Gulf itself. Still, they are nice pictures. We end up sitting on the balcony on the eighth floor every night and the heat, even after the sun goes down, is just incredible. As long as the run is going down there is a slight breeze, but when it disappears usually the breeze stops and it becomes even worse. My friends tell me that insix or seven weeks it will be like heaven. Right now it feels like an oven - and, no, it's not a dry heat.

The New Abu Dhabi Campus

2011-09-05T10:49:00.000-07:00

Doubtless I will be posting about the new Abu Dhabi campus of Zayed University all year, so I won't spend too much time on it now. I think I'll just post a few pictures to break the ice (and what I wouldn't give for some ice - it was around 108 today with whithering humidity). When I agreed to spend a year teaching at Zayed I made it clear that I didn't want to go to Dubai, not simply because Dubai is just a bit too crazy for my taste, but also because their own new campus is out in the middle of the desert. Of course, now that Abu Dhabi has a new campus it is also out in the desert. With that in mind, I came prepared to not like it. Actually, I like it a lot, although everything is still being madly thrown together. My brother, who watched the video, said it looked like something somewhere between a remarkably posh mall and the mother ship, and that I definitely had to go there. My office is in the male wing - there are two equal wings with classrooms and faculty offices and shopts on both side. Simply because you're in the male wing it doesn't necessarily mean that you'll only be teaching the male students and vice-versa. It makes it a bit complicated because if you're in the female section and are teaching a male class you can't really ask your students to come visit you in your office hours, so you end up having "branch" office hours in separate adjunct offices in the corresponding wing. Thye library and fitness building will have certain hours reserved for the different sexes. It's a delicate mix, and one that you would expect with a country that is struggling with modernity like the UAE is. I guess some people get frustrated by this, but maybe it's because I'm an historian (or maybe it's because I've read so much Marcus Aurelius), but I take a more flexible view of the pace of change (and, yes, I know how strange that sounds coming from anyone who has seen me blow up at a faculty senate meeting because people are being slothful - and by that I mean everyone I've ever met; I guess the difference is that we have a million natural advantages so I have trouble accepting our sometimes glacial rate of change, and am more forgiving of other parts of the world).

My First Day

2011-09-04T11:06:00.000-07:00

Today was my first day at the new campus and I really couldn't be happier. The driver showed up right on time this morning to pick up the Radisson Blu Five (Tony [British], Peter [British], Tanya [Serbian], Liane [New Zealand] and yours truly) right on time. The campus seemed to be around twenty minutes away. Right now it's just in the jmiddle of a big stretch of desert, but I suspect, much as with our first house in Atlanta, very quickly the city will catch up and bypass the campus. It is huge, especially considering the fact that there are less than three-thousand students. If you haven't taken the opportunity to watch the video embedded in an earlier posting be sure to do so. It's still pretty chaotic and a lot of things are being delivered on the fly, but I think it's going to be a great experience. I'll post more pictures of the building itself later. Right now I'll just post a few pictures of myself (breaking one of my cardinal rules of never posting pictures of myself, although my friends are always scolding me for not doing so) and my new office. Because, in addition to teaching a couple classes, I'm also serving as the Assistant Dean for Curriculum I received a really nice office. Zayed, and especially my friend Jyoti, have made it clear that they want me to stay and they are doing their level best to make a compelling argument. A couple of my new friends were giving me a little grief over how big my office is, and I responded with a) telling them that they'll really be impressed when I have the wall knocked out as part of my expansion plan, and b) they were still welcome to come by at any time to watch me from a distance behind the velvet rope (and anyone who has ever taught we me could see that coming). I do have to say that the adjoining office where my secretary is housed is pretty posh as well - apparently, from what I can gather, I have the Zayed equivalent of Darlene McGrath, which means I've hit the jackpot. There's also a picture of the bizarre view outside my window, which is sort of a microcosm of the generally surreal feel of this entire adventure. I'm amazed at how happy I look in that picture, although, doubtless, very soon I will cause mischief and it will be everybody else who is frowning. If history teaches us anything this wll turn out much like "Ransom of Red Chief," with Zayed paying Champlain to take me back.

My Travelling Companion

2011-09-04T10:55:00.000-07:00

I guess every Johnson needs a Boswell, but the best I could come up with on this trip is Monkey. He's named, appropriately, after Monkey from Journey to the West. I don't know his real name. He was a gift from my great friends Bob and Cindy Mayer. They were concerned that I would not actually take him along on the trip, but here's proof positive. Monkey is basking in the late afternoon sunshine on my deck. He's thinking about coming up to school tomorrow to check out my new office, so, doubtless, more pictures of his shenanigans will follow.

Reading the Paper

2011-09-03T11:18:00.001-07:00

Here's an interesting section from the paper about technology and how it is shaping our lives: "In this incessant need for technology, we are connecting with the world but aren't we losing touch with the ones we care about the most. . . Most of may may not realise it, but technology has now replaced marriage and other close relationships as a major source of affirmation in our lives. Marriage and family are tough sometimes so people turn to social media for support and understanding." I thought this was really interesting because it's a topic I discuss with my friends and colleagues quite a bit, but especially because it was in the Khaleej Times this morning. There was a related pieced on cyber bullying. We tend to think of these are uniquely American problems when obviously they are incresingly a problem for more and more people around the world. There was also an insightful article about changing gender roles in the Emirati workplace (and the phrase "the pink-collar workforce was used).

In addition, there was a thoughtful op-ed piece on the world's growing population and consumerism. After discussing how quickly China and India would catch up to the US in economic size and consumer hunger, the point was made: "Wherever we look - be it carbon emissions, oil and gas, food shortages, water, rare earths, fisheries or forests - there just isn't enough for the world to soak up another two consumption-driven Americas. To stop heading down this road Asian governments must immediately recognize that a bleak future lies ahead if Asians attempt to live out an aspiration to consume like Americans." It is always a bit humbling/depressing to hear your country used as a synonym for over-consumption (just as it is when the US is used that way when folks describe a violent society) but always pretty ironic that I read it in the UAE, which is the only country in the world to have a larger per capita carbon footprint than the US. That said, for all of their often over the top behavior, it does seem that the Emirates is taking the issue more seriously than the US is.

Finally, there was s story about the US government issueing another travel advisory for American citizens travelling abroad in light of the tenth year anniversary of 9/11, which is, appropriately enough, the first day of my fall class at Zayed. I'll be interested in follow the news coverage, although not so much in the mainstream US media, which I'm afraid will just use it as an excuse for more shallow patriotic chest thumping.

Day One

2011-09-03T11:03:00.000-07:00

Well, I've managed to make it through my first day here in Abu Dhabi at the Radisson Blu. After scarfing down my comp breakfast I went to the fitness center and devoted forty minutes to the treadmill and then lifted weights, and then I went outside for a swim and sat (in the shade - it's 37 C and humid as hell) reading the Khaleej Times. Tonight I had the chance to meet my first new Zayed University professors. Apparently there are five of us out here, all of whom arrived expecting to be placed in a room with a kitchenette and all of whom (or at least the guys I met tonight) ended up in business suites (which are very nice, but which certainly do not have a kitchen and only a small fridge). I had received an email from one of them asking if people wanted to get together tonight in the business suite on the eighth floor for their nightly happy hour. I was more than ready to get out of my room. I met Tony and Peter, two older British professors who have spent decades teaching all throughout the Middle East, and an American named Patrick who is here doing something in regards to border control. It was a very pleasant way to kill a couple hours - sitting out on the balcony watching the sun go down while downing a couple Stella Artois and eating some curried shrimp and chicken. It was made better because it's nightly and the drinks and food are comped, which will help stretch my budget. It's hard to eat in the hotel restaurant for less than $50 so I can't see me doing that very much. The bigger issue, obviously, is whether staying here in the hotel is sustainable, both financially and emotionally. I was thinking about renting a car, but you really can't rent a car until you have an Emirati national identity card, and that may take awhile. I think I'm going to talk to the folks at Zayed about getting an apartment somewhere, although that leads to all sorts of logistical issues of its own. We talked about getting together a reserving a taxi ride to and from the hotel daily with some sort of group rate. I'll have a better handle on things tomorrow when we head into campus for the first day of orientation. So, many questions, but also a nice evening spent with some great guys who told some hysterical stories.

My Place

2011-09-03T06:22:00.000-07:00

Let me post some pictures of the bizarre little world I've found myself in here at the Radisson Blu, and which has left me feeling more than a bit like Bill Murray in Lost in Translation. I arrived late last night at the Abu Dhabi Airport after a very long flight. I had visited Abu Dhabi a few times before, but only after flying into the Dubai Airport. Because I'm actually working here it would have taken longer to check in at the airport than if you're just visiting, which, if you're an American, is just dropping down your passport. There was a long line to look at passports and visas and go through the eye scanner, but I was greeted as soon as I got off the plane by a nice young Filopino woman from a service that whisks me people through the airport, and that's exactly what she did for me. She grabbed me and we blew right past the long queue as if I were an actual VIP (with me apologizing the all the folks in line as we strolled past). So, the entire process which I would imagine would take over an hour, ended up taking about two minutes. Then I was met by a driver arranged by Zayed University, and delivered on to the Radisson Blu, where they also made a big deal over my visit and joked about the fact that my reservation was for 99 nights. The Radisson Blu is located out on Yas Island, one of those man-made islands that the Emirates is famous for. Although the hotel is really nice I can also say that it's not really what I was looking for. I was hoping for a little two bedroom apartment in an actual neighborhood, where I could get used to the lay of the land and frequent little family restaurants, etc. There's nothing out here except for other posh hotels and Ferrari World and the formula one race course (which actually, at one point, runs underneath the five star Yas Hotel). If Zayed was looking to grab my attention they have, although I also can't say that I'm surprised. I just don't know how sustainable any of this is - either me staying here (there's no kitchen, although I have free breakfast everyday in the restaurant downstairs - and I guess I'll just swipe tons of yogurt and store them in my little fridge) or as a country (but more on that later). There also is no place to shop for food or place or laundromate, and I really don't want to spend the rest of the year eating dinner at the fine restaurants at th3e local hotels and having my laundry done by the hotel staff (although one of the perks that Zayed threw in was two free items of laundry a day - yes, it was explained to me last night as I checked in). The room and the hotel is beautiful, just sort of surreal. More on all this later, but here's a few pictures. The balcony is so long that it has two separate sliding doors. Again, it's just surreal.

Four Corners

2011-09-03T03:07:00.000-07:00

I've settled in at Abu Dhabi but I wanted to take the advantage of an off-day to get caught up on some long-delayed blogging. I'll also post some pictures of my new digs here at the Radisson Blu. First off, however, a brief tribute to the Four Corners of the Earth deli, the proud possessor of the best sandwiches in Vermont. It's one of those classic places that you have to know about to find. They do absolutely no advertising, and they're tucked away in a little corner down on Pine Street - and they don't take credit cards. There are only around five tables and often a pretty good wait, especially now because the owner seems to be making all the sandwiches himself without any help (I can't decide whether this is a result of bad economic times or whether the fantastic crew are trapped by Vermont flood waters). My favorite sandwich is the Iraqi Turkey, but lately he's made us an adapted sandwich - sort of a Jamaican with turkey (originally created one day when he was out of ingredients) that is now running neck and neck with the Iraqi. I order the Iraqi all the time and the staff go through this pantomine of telling me about this new sandwich called the Iraqi Turkey that I should consider, and I let myself be talked into it. Believe, all the sandwiches there are great - and a welcome change of pace of the culinary wasteland that is Vermont.

Andy's Goodbye

2011-08-31T04:57:00.001-07:00

Here's a soon to be prize-winning film that my great friend Andy Burkhardt prepared for me as a going away present.

In his email Andy wrote: "As a send off, I figured I would use my emerging technology skills to create a going away video for Scudder. It doesn’t equal the as yet to be completed “Nostradamus Cycle,” and is basically all of Gary’s catchphrases thrown into 90 seconds, but I think it captures Gary well. Moreover, I think that my directorial style is rather similar to one Frank Capra. Hopefully I see most of you at trivia this evening. Our team name is going to be “Ernest and the Shackletons.”"

I especially like his envisioning of my friend and colleague Steve Wehmeyer.

New Campus

2011-08-25T10:14:00.000-07:00

I'll take a quick break from running around like a lunatic to post a quick picture and include a link to the new Abu Dhabi campus of Zayed University where I'll be housed (at least academically) for the next year. We're down to one week before I take off. Next Thursday afternoon I fly out from Burlington to JRK to Doha, Qatar and then the short final hop to Abu Dhabi. I'm exhausted just thinking about it - and, of course, instead of tackling the million and one chores I have to deal with I'm blogging and ordering movies off Amazon. I've figured out that I won't be able to stream moves through Netflix in the UAE and I need movies. Here's a picture of the new brand new campus and a link to a virtual tour.

Retirement of Bohemian Rhapsody

2011-08-18T11:18:00.000-07:00

Before I get around to posting more substantial direct travel stories on this blog once I land in Abu Dhabi (and I actually have a departure date now - 2 September) I should finish up with my local tales of life in Vermont. This one relates to what will undoubtedly go down as my greatest contribution to world intellectual improvement: the official retirement of the execrable Queen song Bohemian Rhapsody. One night at the St. John's Club we were having a deeply philosophical discussion of best and worst songs of all-time, including accepting nominations in the entertaining category of most overrated song of all time. While all of my answers were, of course, the correct ones, I was still impressed/amused by the choices of the other Gentlemen of Excellence in attendance. When discussing overrated songs I threw out my choice of Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen. Now, it may seem like a strange choice, I made it because I remember seeing VH1 or some such silly source naming it the second greatest rock song of all-time. I was not completely serious in my choice, mainly because I don't know if I even would accept it as a rock song, and it certainly wouldn't begin to compare to songs by the Beatles (who are doubtless the most over-rated group of all-time). Still, I passionately defended the choice, mainly because it annoyed my good friend and travelling companion Sandy Zale to no end. Through a process that I'm not sure I remember clearly or could ever explain we determined to decide the fate of Bohemian Rhapsody the only fair way possible: through a dart game. Sandy, through a bit of double knavery worthy of me, immediately chose Mike Lange (the best dart-thrower of the Gentlemen of Excellence) as his partner, leaving me with my great friend Cinse as a partner and defender of all that is holy. That said, Cinse, by her own admission, is not a great dart-thrower - although she makes up for any directional shortcomings with enthusiasm. Somehow, mainly, I suspect, because God was on our side, we played the game of our life and trounced the heavily favored Team America (for some reason Cinse and I had chosen to call our team the Czech Republic). At the very end we had only to throw a double 16 to finish out the game. Cinse, maybe slightly worse for wear, told me with complete sincerity that she could not throw a double 16. I told her not worry about it, and just throw a triple 16 instead - which she proceeded to do on the next throw. So, Bohemian Rhapsody was officially retired and cannot be sung or discussed in polite company again. I can now retire with peace of mind. Sandy, as is his wont, refuses to agree with the utterly fair results of the contest and will toss in lines from the song (such as "it doesn't really matter, to me") at the most inappropriate times, which is why he is continually on probation.

Lake Monsters

2011-08-17T12:18:00.001-07:00

With the move to Abu Dhabi hanging over me a big part of this summer has been devoted to spending time with friends and doing what I love. This helps to explain the epic trips to Oklahoma and New Orleans. I've also made a real concerted effort to get out and see my friends closer to home. Naturally, some of that related to going to as many Vermont Lake Monsters games as possible. I have such a child-like love of the game, and few things make me happier than sitting in the stands at Centennial Field watching the Lake Monsters play. Because it is short season A (less than half the number of games of a major league season) there is no way that you'll know any of the players (although it is exciting to see some of them pop up years later in the bigs). Occasionally you'll recognize an ex-player as a manger ("hey, didn't that guy used to be the utility infielder for the Cubs?") or the son of an ex-major leaguer. The best night is the annual 25 cent hot dog night, which always leads to epic gormanderie. The field itself is great and, as the picture of the sign indicates, quite a few famous players have graced the field over the years. That said, it's in a fairly dilapidated state and every year the fear is that it is the last for our beloved Lake Monsters (the figure thrown around to bring the field up to standards is $3 million, and nobody has that kind of money). And then, miraculously, at the end of the season it's always announced that they're coming back. This year they've moved from the Nationals system to the Oakland A's, and they're actually a pretty good team this year. Here is a picture of one of recent games, featuring Andy Burkhardt, Mike Lange and Erik Esckilsen. Go Lake Monsters!

Moving Day

2011-08-17T11:55:00.000-07:00

While I can't claim to be in the twlight of my youth (to borrow a line from Ryan Adams), I guess I'm not too old for new adventures - and the first step in this adventure was moving out of the Q. I can't believe how quickly the last year flew by, and Sunday brought an end to my time as faculty in residence at Quarry Hill. It actually was a lot more enjoyable than I thought it would be, and I enjoyed spending time with the freshmen. While I'm not due to fly out to Abu Dhabi for a couple weeks (if it is ever organized, that is) I did have to be out of the Q by this last weekend. As always, the redoubtable Gentlemen of Excellence stepped up to help me move - thanks to Bob Mayer, Andy Burkhardt, Original Mike Lange, False Mike Kelly, Steve Wehmeyer and Craig Pepin. I had far more help than my motley collection of belongings called for, and I actually contacted folks and told them not to come, but they would not be deterred (which means they are either true friends or desperately wanted to get me out of the state). It took less than a half-hour to unload the apartment, with the exception of the hours that Mike Lange and I spent driving to Jericho (to unload boxes at Cyndi Brandenburg's house) and Wilder (to return things to my sister Lisa). I devoted a couple hours to finishing up on Sunday night, but now I'm out and on to new things. Next stop, sort of, Abu Dhabi. Oh, and the excellent Andy Burkhardt insisted that I entrust my 35 year old Fran Tarkenton jersey to him to root on the Vikings at our traditional Sundays at Ruben James. Hopefully he'll have better luck with it than I ever did.

Many Goodbyes

2011-08-17T07:04:00.001-07:00

I've really been remiss in blogging lately, mainly because of the mad rush in trying to get the trip to Abu Dhabi organized. If I ever get my flight scheduled I'll consider it a good day. Last Tuesday morning I woke up to an email from Zayed asking me if I liked my itinerary for Sunday's flight - that is, the Sunday following five days after the email. I managed to convince them that it was not a particularly good idea, especially since the week before they had decided that I was flying on 30 August. Now I think we're back to 30 August, but who really knows. Still, I am always happy with small victories, so having more time actually gives me the chance to try and get fairly organized. In addition to moving out of the Q (more on that later) I've also devoted time to planning my classes and setting up online bill payment and packing, etc. I've really been touched by how many folks seem genuinely upset/moved by the thought of me moving away, even if it is probably only for a year. Many of my friends have taken me out for dinner and/or drinks, and it has been, while more than a touch bittersweet, wonderful. Here are a few pictures from a going away soiree that my great friend Wes threw for me at his condo down on the lake. He really outdid himself, including his mysterious box of presents. Wes hired me at Champlain over eleven years ago and we've always remained very close. I'm missing everyone already.

My Travels with Sandy

2011-06-21T13:51:00.001-07:00

We made it back safe and reasonably sound from the epic trip to Guymon, Oklahoma. I've managed to fill up over 130 posts, with dozens of pictures and videos, relating to the odyssey in the OKexcellence blog, so I won't be spending a ton of time analyzing the trip here - although there will be some more reflective pieces later on. At this point all I'd like to document is what an amazing travelling companion Sandy Zale, the "Sage of Sayville," turned out to be. I think it would be fair to say that Sandy and I both possess over-sized personalities, which gave some folks more than a little trepidation in regards to the thought of us being trapped in the same car together for two and a half weeks. I think Mike Lange summed the fear up rather succintly with two words: shallow grave. That said, Sandy and I got along famously, with not one cross word uttered (and with my infamous temper that's really saying something). The best proof of how well we got along is that not once in two and a half week and four thousand miles did we turned on the radio or pop in a CD in the car. And with the exception of one night in Parkersburg, WV when I was in the lobby trying to track down some wifi and Sandy managed to find his watch show on the shopping network (don't ask, none of us understand this mania - although it has a certain charming Professor Moriarty feel to it), did we even turn on the TV. I filmed a couple hours of Sandy holding forth along our drive. Normally I'd wait until he was driving and then I'd ask him a question about some aspect of the trip, and he'd hold forth for a few minutes. I'm slowly posting the greatest hits on the OKexcellence blog. What I wish I had filmed were the countless hours we spent discussing politics, teaching, philosophy, women (and that was truly the blind leading the blind) and life in general. I had the most amazing time and I can't thank him enough for including me on his quest for America. Part of what made this trip so great is that it was just two friends spending time together. In some ways the high point of the journey on that front was the night we spent at Braff's Sports Bar in Emporia, Kansas, playing twelve games of pool while tornadoes bounced around us on the Kansas plains. The other thing that made this trip so memorable was that it was carried out in the shadow of the impending trip to Abu Dhabi and a year spent in the Middle East. Maybe I needed some time in America before embarking so far afield. My good friend Cyndi Brandenburg has entitled this summer the Summer of Scudder, when we're all going to spend a lot of time together before I head off to the great unknown. I guess the trip to Guymon was a remarkably worthy kick-off.

Next Year

2011-06-13T06:25:00.001-07:00

I've been ignoring this blog while focusing my attention on the okexcellence.wordpress.com blog and the trip westward. Once we get back to VT (I'm sitting in the lobby of a Holiday Inn Express in Tulsa, OK) I'll post a lot of more reflective material on the trip here. In the meantime I wanted to go ahead and talk briefly about the plans for next year that are finally coming together. I talked to my good friend Jyoti Grewal last night and it definitely looks like I'll be spending next year in Abu Dhabi, UAE, acting as the Assistant Dean for Curriculum at Zayed University. Jyoti is the Dean at Zayed and she wants me to teach a class and tinker with the curriculum and run some professional development programming. It's quite a challenge, and that excites me, and it is a great fit for me at this point in my career. I have some conflicted feelings about it, mainly personal, but I'll deal with it. I guess I'll leave in late August. More later.

Long Island

2011-06-03T03:53:00.001-07:00

Sandy and I have spent the last two days at his parents' place in Long Island (Bayport). His parents are great, as is his sister Camie. Saw a lot of Sayville, the neighboring town where he grew up. Discovered a great local beer, Blue Point Toasted Lager. Nice walk on the beach at Cupsogue Beach at the far eastern end of Long Island. This morning we take off for Washington, DC, Sandy to attend his college reunion and me to stay with my friend Debi and family.

Cyndi Brandenburg on America

2011-05-31T10:39:00.000-07:00

The excellent Dr. Cyndi Brandenburg on America in preparation for the Trip of Excellence.

Pre-Trip Fun

2011-05-30T08:34:00.001-07:00

The time is flying by before leaving for Oklahoma on Wednesday morning. Last night the Brandenburg/Vespas came over for Super Nachodic (doesn't this work like tornadic?) splendor. Somehow a piece of pie blew up shrapnel-like in Joey's hands, coating him over his half his body. It was pretty spectacular. Tonight I have an invitation for a cookout at the Noonan/Wehmeyers. How did I get so lucky to have so many amazing friends? I know that Sandy is also invited so maybe this will allow for further planning for the Trip of Excellence. I'm also going to try and get in a bike ride and also price a Flip camera. Oh, and somewhere along the way I need to think about getting packed.

Mainly I think I justed wanted to try out the Blogger app I just downloaded.

The Quest

2011-05-28T04:37:00.000-07:00

Of all the strange twists and turns that my life has taken over the last couple years I may be getting ready to embark on the strangest one. Next week I'm heading off to Guymon, Oklahoma with my great friend Sanford Zale. I teach with Sandy at Champlain and he is the founding member of the Gentlemen of Excellence. For the last couple years I've been hearing him lament the fact that he's visited 47 of the lower 48 states, having only, somehow, missed Oklahoma. Every year there is a new plan to somehow (insh'allah) make it to Oklahoma, but something always happens to delay/destroy the plans. Finally, I decided to take matters into my own hands and told Sandy that I would get him to Oklahoma, even if I had to drive the whole way.

As with most of my plans, what started out a simple and even whimsical idea has taken on a life of its own. With the help of my excellent friends Andy and Heidi, we now have our own blog (http://okexcellence.wordpress.com) and twitter account (@OKexcellence) to recount the adventures. I'm sure I'll be posting material from the trip onto this blog, but the trip is too epic to be constrained by the narrow borders of the On the Way Home blog.

We're taking off Wednesday and driving to Long Island to see Sandy's parents and drop off his cat Bacon (named after Sir Francis Bacon). Then we're off to Washington, DC so that Sandy can attend his college reunion, and I'll take the opportunity to spend a few days with my friend Debi and her family. After that we're going to head west on US 50 into the heart of darkness. Along the way we plan on spending a couple days in Cincinnati with my best friend David Kelley, and then hopefully on into Indiana to see my Dad.

The big mystery has been the final destination of the trip. That was revealed last night during a planning session at the St. John's Club (athough I left before the karoake part of the contingency planning). We're headed to Guymon, Oklahoma. Yes, another trip to Guymon, Oklahoma. Why Guymon? Well, if you go to the Guymon website it proudly points out that "As the largest, most centrally located city in the panhandle, Guymon is the business and retail center of the region." Sandy chose Guymon because "it's the city with the boldest print on the map of any city in the panhandle." I, of course, could not argue with that logic. I wanted to take US 50 because it goes through the Natti, so it has a certain romantic appeal to me. My understanding of the directions is that we just head west on US 50 and when we're half-way across the country we take a left.

I was recently explaining to my friend David my scheme of spending next Christmas in Samarkand, Uzbekistan and my next birthday in Sanaa, Yemen. He thought the Oklahoma trip sounded more dangerous and certainly more worthy of a David Lynch film.

My Imbecility

2011-05-24T08:22:00.000-07:00

I came across this picture the other day that my friend Marcie (one of the great folks from the CIEE Silk Road trip) sent me. I suppose I might be posting it because it reminds me of the thousand and one incredible meals we had in China, and, well, truthfully, that is part of it. However, I think I'm probably posting it because it is a reminder of how inept I am at all things (probably being re-enforced by my clumsy battles with Arabic). We used chop sticks during every meal in China, and it's not as if I had never used them before that point, but during one of our last meals a student turned to me and asked if this was the first time I had ever tried them. I could only smile.