One thing only came near to destroying my pleasure during our adventurous ride, owing to the angry astonishment into which it flung me for a moment. "You know," Saint-Loup suddenly said to me, "I told Bloch that you didn't like him all that much, that you found him rather vulgar at times. I'm like that, you see, I like clear-cut situations," he wound up with a self-satisfied air and in an unanswerable tone of voice. I was astounded. Not only had I the most absolute confidence in Saint-Loup, in the loyalty of his friendship, and he had betrayed it by what he had said to Bloch, but it seemed to me that he of all men ought to have been restrained from doing so by his defects as well as by his good qualities, by that astonishing veneer of breeding which was capable of carrying politeness to what was positively a want of frankness. Was his triumphant air the sort that we assume to cloak a certain embarrassment in admitting a thing which we know that we ought not to have done? Was it simply the expression of frivolity, stupidity, making a virtue out of a defect which I had not associated with him? Or a passing fit of ill humour towards me, prompting him to make an end of our friendship, or the registering of a passing fit of ill humour against Bloch to whom he had wanted to say something disagreeable even thought it would compromise me?
Marcel Proust, The Guermantes Way, p. 414
Proust's appreciation for Robert Saint-Loup, and for that matter their very friendship, takes a hit when Robert admits that he had shared confidence, and, more accurately, lied, to Marcel's friend Bloch. Marcel had been so relieved to have Robert show up unexpected, but now he is hurt by this admission and tries to sort out the possible reasons, ranging from a conscious decision to provoke harm or an unconscious flaw in his character. Mainly, he is stunned that Robert should have been "restrained from doing so by his defects as well as by his good qualities." Essentially, Robert had displayed all the attributes of being a good friend, but, failing that, he had enough sins of his own that one would think he would have the common sense to not spread rumors. What Marcel doesn't consider is that it is Robert's own bad attributes that inspired this act, both his desire to appear as the unpredictable "bad boy" but also his desire to look like the better person by pointing out (or fabricating) something hurtful. I have many flaws but I am a steadfast, at times almost comically, loyal friend, and I expect the favor to be returned. Like all of us, I suppose, I have a list of ex-friends, both in the broader world and here in Burlington, who I left behind along the way, but in my case, and relating to this discussion, it relates mainly to the issue of trust. Simply put, there have been friends of mine over the years who proved to not be true friends, in that they would say one thing and mean quite another, if not actually speak out against me behind my back. Life is too short to have people like that in your life. They didn't become my bitter enemies or anything like that, simply because they aren't worth the time. I'm interested to see if Robert somehow redeems himself in Marcel's eyes. I've forgiven friends for many things, but duplicity is something I just can't seem to get past. In a bad mood one time I proposed that the only things you acquire in life are false friends and true enemies. Now, I'm sure I don't really believe that, but in someways the true enemies are more appreciated because at least you can depend upon them to act as such.
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