What It Means - Day 196

"According to Mu'adh ibn Jabal: 'A man gets no credit for a Prayer in which he deliberately notices those on this right and left.'"
Abu Hamid al-Ghazali, Inner Dimensions of Islamic Worship

I'm hopping back and forth between the Quran and al-Ghazali's work, and for the worst of all reasons - sometimes I have one in front of me and sometimes I have the other in front of me. Do we really need any more proof of why I'm such a terrible "scholar," let alone a terrible scholar. This passage spoke to me because it it circles back to the issue of "monkey mind" and my propensity to lose focus during prayer. Again, I'm trying to be honest, and not just say what it sounds like I should say. If you're noticing the person praying next to you or envisioning yourself praying, then clearly you've lost the thread. Does this mean that your prayer is invalid? I'm sure al-Ghazali would say yes, and my Imam would be moved to say yes (but being a good soul he would make the point more gently). I'm not certain that your prayer in that distracted instance would be invalid, but it certainly wouldn't be very productive. To me prayer is a moment of something akin to meditation, where you are removing yourself from the madness and transience of this world and trying (trying) to focus on something more quiet and pure and eternal. If your mind wanders I can't believe that the entire process is worthless, but you're definitely not taking advantage of an increasingly rare moment to link up with something profound, even if that profundity is totally within you.

What It Means - Day 195

"Those who disbelieve among the People of the Book and the idolaters will not desist until the clear proof comes upon them."

Quran 98:1

Here is the opening verse from al-Bayyinah, the 98th surah, here rendered as "The Clear Proof." I decide on what I'm going to blog about on any given day for any number of reasons, and this one is rather peculiar. In this case I chose this one because, well, it's not clear. While I often quote Nasr's commentary from the Study Quran I don't normally quote a huge amount of Nasr, but this time I'm going to do so simply because it speaks to the complexity of the Quran and the need for study. Nasr tells us:

"Some commentators consider this verse to be among the most difficult verses of the Quran. According to most commentators, those who disbelieve among the People of the Book refers to disbelievers among both Jews and Christians, though some say it refers only to the Jews of Madinah. Most read this verse to mean that disbelievers will leave their disbelief until the clear proof of revelation has come to them. Others say that it could mean that they will not be punished or destroyed until the proof of revelation has been brought to them, in which case the idolaters will not desist could be translated 'the idolaters will not be abandoned,' meaning that God will send them the clear proof and they will then be rewarded or punished based upon their acceptance or rejection of it. This interpretation accords with many passages confirming that God will not punish any for wrong belief until they have been presented with the truth and then rejected it, as in 17:15 And never do We punish till We have sent a messenger. In this vein, the verse can be seen as a specific reference to disbelief in the prophethood of Muhammad, not necessarily to disbelief in God. Most interpret the clear proof as a reference to the Quran, as in 6:57 Truly I stand upon a clear proof from my Lord, and you have denied Him. Others take clear proof as a reference to the Prophet Muhammad. But it can also be seen as a reference to the phenomena of revelation and thus to the books and prophets sent to all communities, since the dozens of references to clear proof(s) throughout the Quran are used in relation to many different prophets and the books with which they were sent (see the introduction to this surah). In this interpretation, disbelievers among the People of the Book refers to those who are said to have altered the scriptures that had been sent to them through previous prophets." (p. 1542)

So, I guess rabbit holes didn't actually begin with YouTube after all. Going back to my original point, I don't know how one can begin to make sense of the Quran without something like the Study Quran at their side. From a Muslim perspective the complexity is proof of the miracle. Just as we will say how could an unlettered merchant have produced such poetic verses, how could Muhammad have produced such a spiritually and intellectually complex book? In the end, however, I'm still coming back to one of my main recurring points: even if God is as close as our jugular vein, I sometimes think that we need to read the Quran from a distance. I think we need to think of the entire message in a larger context, trying to get at the essential core messages, and not get so distracted at little corners of the work (no matter how fascinating they are) because then we can be very guilty of cherry picking out the passages that back up our own interests.

 

What It Means - Day 194

"The life of this world is naught but play and diversion."
Quran 6:32

Here's another passage from al-An'am, the 6th surah, here rendered as "The Cattle." I know I've touched on similar points in the Quran before but, as we know, I'm a generally disorganized person, or at least I tend to follow my instincts and desires (and, yes, I get the inherent irony of that statement in explaining how I ended up here at this moment for this verse). I think passages like this one make people think that religions, especially Islam, are dreary places where folks sit around and lifelessly stare at religious texts pausing only to criticize the behavior of others (not that we don't have our fair share of those folks, obviously). Instead, life is supposed to be a gift from God, and why would He/She/It want us to be absolutely miserable? Rather, the joys of this life can be distracting from bigger issues. As Nasr tells us, "This world is described as mere play and diversion (see also 29:64; 47:36; 57:20) insofar as play and diversion involve a certain delusion in which the inner reality of things is obscured by outward appearances. The pejorative description of the world as play is meant not to disparage play of any sort, which is certainly permissible in Islam, but rather to make the point that many of those things accorded great weight and significance in this world as a mere child's play in relation to the reality of the Hereafter." (p. 350)

I keep finding myself hearkening back to Postman's Amusing Ourselves to Death, which I really should reread (again). His points about how are minds are dominated by rapid entertainment and how it impacts, impacted and will impacted education and politics (one only has to look at the Trump phenomenon) read like prophecy. Similarly, his point about the corruptive influence on education was also spot-on. A couple years ago I went to a Christmas mass at a nearby Catholic Church (this is just an example, not taking a specific pot shot at them - they tend to stay on point much more readily than their other Christian siblings) and they had invited a local radio team (they were upstairs where the choir would normally be) to provide music and entertainment during "dull" moments in the service. I was appropriately horrified, and not simply because there are few things more uncool than the appropriately uncool trying to be inappropriately cool. However, it ended up being distracting and embarrassing. So, there's plenty of room for play but there's also a time for study and work. Didn't the psychologists prove that multi-tasking is not actually a thing?

What It Means - Day 193

"Whosoever brings a good deed shall have ten times the like thereof; but whosoever bring an evil deed shall be recompenses only with the like thereof, and they shall not be wronged."
Quran 6:160

I know I've posted similar passages before but I'm revisiting the concept because I think it's an important one, not only because it speaks to the external perception of Islam but also in regards to religions more generally. This specific passage is drawn from al-An'am, the 6th surah, here rendered as "The Castle." The point is a simple one, but one that sits at the heart of Islam: good deeds "weigh" more than evil deeds. Do I think they "weight" ten times more, and that God sits around with a gigantic scale measuring them? No, not really, for any number of reasons. However, do I think that good deeds are more important than bad deeds?  Yes, I think they do. Moreover, this speaks to the fact that, despite popular perceptions to the contrary, that Islam is actually a very positive religions. It focuses on the positive benefits of doing the right thing, no matter how small the act, hence the emphasis on small kindnesses, as compared to threatening punishment. Are there references in the Quran to the "hellfire," yes, certainly, and doubtless too many of them. They pale in comparison to the number of references to doing the right thing. Early in this process we asked why it was that Islam was growing so fast, both globally but also here in the US. I think one of the reasons is that it is a very active, positive faith, and not one that gets people to tow the line for fear of hell. That said, there are definitely good many Muslims who operate within that intellectual/spiritual universe, but if we were just afraid of avoiding the hellfire that wouldn't explain why so many people love the faith.

What It Means - Day 192

"The calamity; what is the calamity? And what shall apprise thee of the calamity? A day wherein mankind shall be like scattered moths, and the mountains shall be like carded wool."
Quran 101:1-5

There are many passages in the Quran where you get a glimpse of the poetic majesty of the work, even when you're reading it in Arabic. I would argue that this is one of them, which probably explains, at least initially, why I chose it. These are the opening five verses to al-Qari'ah, the 101st surah, here rendered as "The Calamity." It is a beautiful, although terrifying, image of the day of judgment that is painted. At the same time, and this gets us to the second reason why I chose it, it is a terrifying image if you believe in a day of judgment or at least a day of judgment that would take that form. Truthfully, I don't know how I feel about the notion that one day the stars will shatter and the sky will split asunder, which is why I continue to study and pray and meditate on my faith. As I've said, trying to be honest and not to just say what my brothers and sisters would prefer me to say, I think a lot of this is a metaphor, a way of explaining the ineffability of the divine. I think every action that we take moves us close or further away from the quiet, still, kindness at the heart of everything - and I do think your actions matter - but does that equate with the end of the world as it is often painted (and not just in Islam)? I don't know. Is it only a metaphor for the fact that your actions and words have a weight and you should measure them because someday you - and the people you hurt or helped - won't be here anymore. Is that enough? I'm still working on that one.

What It Means - Day 191

"Vying for increase distracts you, till you visit the graves. Nay! Soon you will know. Indeed! Soon you will know."
Quran 102:1-4

Here are the first four verses from the 102nd surah, al-Takathur, here rendered as "Vying for Increase," which draws its name from this opening. It is one of the many warnings in the Quran against focusing our attention on the accumulation of wealth as a means in and of itself. As Nasr points out in the related Study Quran commentary, "According to a saying attributed to the Prophet, it means gathering wealth without right, withholding it from those to whom it rightfully belongs, and hoarding it." (p. 1555) Not surprisingly, I suppose, it sounds like something that the Ghost of Christmas Present who have said to Scrooge, which I guess speaks to the universality of the message. How many centuries have we been reminding ourselves of this essential truth, and yet never learning the lesson?

What It Means - Day 190

"May the hands of Abu Lahab perish, and may he perish! His wealth avails him not, nor what he has earned. He shall enter a blazing Fire. And his wife, carrier of firewood, upon her neck is a rope of palm fiber."
Quran 111:1-5

Here is the entirety of surah 111, al-Masad, here rendered as "The Palm Fiber." It's one of the shortest surahs, as we would expect from a chapter so near the end of the 114 surahs that make up the Quran. It's a very straight-forward surah, but also one that is at times difficult to process. By way of context Nasr, in the related commentary from the Study Quran, tells us, "Abu Lahab was the wealthiest of the Prophet's uncles and one of the Qurayshi leaders who most opposed the Prophet and persecuted his followers." (p. 1576) This is interesting on several levels, being that calls out an individual, and one living at that moment, for an attack. It's not that societies and individuals (even if they are only identified by position, as in, the Pharaoh) aren't called out in the Quran, but they are usually dredged up out of the past and used as exemplars of bad behavior who deserved punishment. Abu Lahab was living during the time of the revelation. So, did God specifically identify Abu Lahab in this revelation? Or, does this give us an insight into the process of how revelations work. That is, God sent a message through Gabriel to Muhammad, but that message was more of a concept, which Muhammad "translated" into a specific revelations. So, God identified a type of behavior that was worthy of condemnation, but it was Muhammad who "identified" the specific person, in this case his uncle who was terrorizing him. It's an interesting way to think about it, but also that is, obviously, fraught with pitfalls. One of the biggest pitfalls is the sense of anger, even justifiable anger, that it might express on the part of Muhammad, a person that we don't normally associate with anger.

What It Means - Day 189

"This advice was given to someone by the Prophet, on him be peace: 'When you pray, pray like a person who is saying farewell,' i.e. saying farewell to himself, to his passions and to his life, before setting off on the journey to his Lord."
Abu Hamid al-Ghazali, Inner Dimensions of Islamic Worship

I know that this is a very simple statement, but so far this is the statement from al-Ghazali that floored me the most thoroughly and profoundly. As I've admitted I have more than a bit of, as my Buddhist friend opined, monkey mind, and I don't think I do a very good job reaching the stage that al-Ghazali envisions. I enjoy prayer, although I don't know if it goes beyond the level of a series of quiet meditative reflections on my blessings and my personal faults, and clearly I need to get to another level. Hopefully reading this work, and more from al-Ghazali, and more of the mystics will help me with one of my many failings.

What It Means - Day 188

"'Do not approach the Prayer when you are intoxicated, until you know what you are saying.' [al-Nisa, 4:43]

Some say that 'intoxicated' mean inebriated by many anxieties, while other say it means drunk on the love of this world. According to Wahb, the meaning is obviously a caution against worldly attachment, since the words 'until you know what you are saying' explain the underlying reason. Many are those who pray without having drunk wine, yet do not know what they are saying in their Prayers.!'"
Abu Hamid al-Ghazali, Inner Dimensions of Islamic Worship

As I warned you, most of the foreseeable posts are going to center around al-Ghazali and his Inner Dimensions of Islamic Worship, which I'm both thoroughly enjoying and which is making my head hurt and, not to put too fine a point on it, my heart expand. Here al-Ghazali is referencing the fourth surah and one of the four times in the Quran when alcohol is referenced. In an earlier post I walk us through the four passages and the evolution of a statement on drinking. The point I made at the time is that we get wound up on drinking, but sometimes forget why we're warned against drinking, so I guess it's not surprising that this passage jumped out at me. Here al-Ghazali is considering intoxication in a much broader context, and that we can be "intoxicated" in such a way that he stands in the way of reaching a meditative spiritual place in all sorts of ways, including a "caution against worldly attachment." In this case the ablutions are not a physical cleaning, but rather a spiritual cleaning, and not because of the holiness of the water, but rather the process of placing yourself in a state to approach God (however you define that).

What It Means - Day 187

"According to another Tradition: 'The servant is never closer to God, Exalted is He, than when he is prostrating himself in worship. This is the meaning of the words of God, Great and Glorious is He, "Prostrate yourself and draw near." [Izra', 96:19] "Their foreheads show the ark left by prostration." [al-Fath, 48:29] Some say this refers to the dust that sticks to the brow during the act of prostration, while others say it is the light of humility, shining forth from within. The latter view if more correct. According to yet others, it is the radiance that will shine on their faces on the Day of Resurrection, as a result of their ablution.'"
Abu Hamid al-Ghazali, Inner Dimensions of Islamic Worship

Once again I'm drawing a passage out of al-Ghazali's Inner Dimensions of Islamic Worship, which I suspect will be dominating the daily blog posts for a while. For all of the respect given to prayer rugs, and I have several of my own, the argument is made in this discussion that the better approach is to touch your forehead to the ground itself. The obvious key here is humility. It's not that you have to debase yourself before God, but rather that you have to place yourself in the appropriate position, more spiritually than physically, actually, as part of this meditative moment.

What It Means - Day 186

"Traditions of the Prophet, on him be peace:
'Two members of my Community may perform the Prayer in such a way that their bowing and their prostration are as one, yet their Prayers may be as far apart as heaven and earth. (In respect of their humility, that is.)'"
Abu Hamid al-Ghazali, Inner Dimensions of Islamic Worship

For a person who is not as serious about his faith as I probably should be - that is often how I feel about myself, and I'm sure how my brothers and sisters at the masjid feel about me - I sure seem to devote a lot of my time to studying my faith. Lately I've been reading Abu Hamid al-Ghazali's Inner Dimensions of Islamic Worship. al-Ghazali was an eleventh century philosopher and mystic who wrote many works, which apparently I'm going to have to track down and read because I've found this work to be profound and humbling. I think I was drawn to this volume because of my perpetual struggle between the more internal and external versions of faith, and my frustration if not sometimes careless rejection of the external. al-Ghazali's point is that dichotomy between the internal and external is a false one, and I shouldn't be surprised by this argument since it's the same one that Nasr makes in the Heart of Islam and we know what a man crush I have on Seyyed Nasr. On one level I'll blame it on my training as a historian and my decades of teaching about religion. I think I default to the endless compromises that religions make as they evolve and devolve, and my belief that too many of the things that we view as essential to the faith are instead decisions devised by the leaders of the religions to bring the often fractious communities together. So, Solomon built the temple in Jerusalem because of his deep faith, but also as a mechanism to draw the tribes together and centralize authority. As Muslims we all pray the same way and are pushed to learn the prayers in Arabic less because it truly pleases God and more because it is an artificial means to unite the ummah. What is beautiful about al-Ghazali's work is that it is making me reconsider this whole question.

Obviously, much more on this coming.

What It Means - Day 185

"And say, 'It is the truth from your Lord! So whosoever will, let him believe, and whosoever will, let him disbelieve.'"
Quran 18:24

I don't normally have themes in the daily discussion of faith (it's usually whatever pops into my fevered brain that morning) but that last several have been based on the popular perception that Islam is a religion which has and is spread by forced conversion (or, as we would have said at the time, spread at the point of a sword), as compared to the reality that we are reminded repeatedly throughout the Quran that your decision has to be based on free will. Here is another reminder, this one drawn from the 18th surah, al-Kahf, "The Cave." I will have so much more to say about this particular surah because it's one that I find absolutely fascinating, and one that completely changed my perception of the Quran itself. At this point I'll just leave us with this reminder that while God may have an opinion of whether you believe or don't believe, it's nobody else's business.

What It Means - Day 184

"And had thy Lord willed, all those who are on the earth would have believed all together. Wouldst thou compel men till they become believers? It is not for a soul to believe, save by God's Leave."
Quran 10:99-100

And since we're talking about the concept of a forced conversion, and the popular perception that Islam is a religion that forces itself on others, here's another example from the Quran which emphasizes that there can be no compulsion in religion. I mean, if you ever attend an Iftar dinner at your local mosque you will be stuffed to the gills, and doubtless some sister or brother will invite you back and tell you about how amazing it is to be a Muslim, but that's not quite the same thing as being forced at sword point to become a Muslim. As I've shared, when I initially thought about converting our local Imam put me off, either because he knew I'd be a pain or because he thought I viewed it more as a scholarly exercise than a true journey of faith (and, who know, both may be true, especially the former). This particular passage, which is drawn from the 10th surah, Yunus, obviously rendered as Jonah (yes, that Jonah) is another reminder in the Quran that are decisions of faith must be based on free will. In this case the argument is an interesting one: everyone does or doesn't do anything because of God's will, and if you force someone to convert then you're essentially claiming one of God's prerogatives.

What It Means - Day 183

"There is no coercion in religion."
Quran 2:256

We've discussed several times about the common belief from outside of Islam that it's a religion spread by force. I think I shared the story (we're now half a year into this daily discussion of faith and I'm already forgetting what I wrote) about a colleague of mine of Zayed in Abu Dhabi who made that statement, and this was a man who had spent years living and teaching in the Middle East. Nevertheless, the Quran points out repeatedly that all religious choices must be based on free will. Why does the point of view still persist that Islam is spread at the point of a sword?  Granted, some of this is just plain, unvarnished Islamophobia and racism, certainly. And doubtless a lot of this relates to ignorance of the faith, what it means. The perception continues that it is a harsh, spiritually dry religion, which probably relates to the fact that folks still equate the Arab world and deserts, although, as we've discussed, only about a fifth of the world's Muslims live in the Arabic world. I think people who don't understand why any single person would ever become a Muslim would be doubly perplexed by 1.6 billion people becoming Muslims, so it has to be by force. Instead, we are told repeatedly in the Quran that the decision is yours. Can you find examples of forced conversion into Islam, both in history and in today's contemporary world? Yes, sadly, almost certainly, as you can with every faith. In a world desperate to demonize an entire faith those are the ones that will receive attention.

Puppy Love

It's difficult to believe but this is my twentieth year at Champlain, which means that I'll now been here eleven years longer than I was at Georgia Perimeter College. With the passage of time it now seems like I was at GPC for around a year and a half, and have been at Champlain for a century. This also means that I have two decade friendships with people that I only know through Champlain, which is a bit staggering to consider. One of those folks is my friend Ann who I have known since I arrived at Champlain, although I've only gotten to know her a lot better over the last few years because of our shared friendship with my great friend Kevin. She has very kindly invited me out to her house a couple times, including over this last weekend to see her dog Bella's first brood of puppies. Since Ann was looking for folks to take the puppies I kept sharing her puppy-related Facebook posts, and by way of saying thanks she arranged dinner and a puppy-viewing this weekend. As always it was a lovely time, featuring great great food, friendship and, well, puppies.

Ann being lovingly mauled by one of the puppies. It's hard to believe that Ann didn't grow up with dogs because she is quite the authority on dogs and breeding now.

And here's Ann's husband Jim, who is a wonderfully kind and generous soul.

The puppy mosh pit.

Here I am barely hiding my total disdain for puppies and everything they stand for. And, yes, Ann and Jim counted the puppies before I left.

What It Means - Day 182

"Will you enjoin piety upon mankind, and forget yourselves, while you recite the Book? Do you not understand? Seek help in patience and prayer, and this indeed is difficult except for the humble, who reckon that they shall meet their Lord and that they shall return unto Him."
Quran 2:44-45

The second surah, al-Baqarah, usually rendered as "The Cow," is the longest surah in the Quran by far so by the time we're finished we'll have visited it and revisited it several times (and still only scratched the surface of a complex and important surah). When discussing this passage Nasr in the Study Quran commentary writes, "Depending on context, the term rendered piety (birr) has the sense of goodness, kindness, loyalty, sincerity, or obedience. For piety, see also 2:177, 189; 3:92. The 'pious' (abrar) are often mentioned in connection with heavenly rewards (3:193; 76:5; 82:13). Piety in this verse can mean obedience to God as well as prayer and alms." (p. 26) To me, what draws me to this particular passage is the emphasis on patience and humility, which, in turn, is one of the reasons why I think prayer is so essential. We all like to be thanked, but, truthfully, I think God is so far beyond needing us to thank Him five times a day, except in the sense that you thank God and live a godly life when you try and treat others with love and kindness and compassion. And I don't think any of these virtues are possible without patience and humility, and stopping several times a day to recalibrate yourself is essential.

What It Means - Day 181

"And therein We prescribed for them: a life for a life, and eye for an eye, a nose for a nose, an ear for an ear, a tooth for a tooth, and wounds, retribution. But whosoever forgoes it out of charity, it shall be an expiation for him."
Quran 5:45

This passage, drawn from a surah we've visited before and will again, surah 5, al-Ma'idah, here rendered as "The Table Spread," reminds us of Islam's place inside of the Abrahamic monotheistic tradition. Obviously, it is referring to the punishments laid out in the Old Testament. Christians, being the second faith in the tradition, often stress a kinship with Judaism but view Islam as some odd interloper. Muslims stress the continuation of the tradition and its place therein. This particular passage is part of a discussion of how some Jewish tribes were bringing in social class status to their interpretation of the original law, that is, people of a higher class status were being treated differently than someone of a lower class. The Quranic response here is that if you're going to follow this rule then everyone must be truly the same. However, what interests me here is that the Quran takes a step forward and proposes that if you avoid the severity of the original ruling - if someone "forgoes it out of charity" - that will be a blessing. So the Quran is advocating for at least a fairer treatment, but also a kinder interpretation.

What It Means - Day 180

"God has not placed two hearts in the breast of any man."
Quran 33:4

This very short, but profound, passage is drawn from the 33rd surah, al-Ahzab, here rendered as "The Parties." This coming semester I'll be teaching a section of Sacred & Secular at Champlain, which is one of the choices in our second year, sometimes referred to as the "western year." The descriptor itself is an oversimplification because there's always room to sneak non-western stuff in, and some people went rogue really early and gave their versions a more global theme (it could be anyone, really, just folks who struggle with rules). Our decade-old Core curriculum, which is in the process of being disassembled, had a certain inherent logic: self to community to west to global. The second year courses focused on things that made the west, well, the west, which is why the course Sacred & Secular was designed. In many cultures/religions there is not, at least philosophically, a clear distinction between the sacred and secular worlds (Nasr makes that point between those two worlds in Islam in his brilliant book The Heart of Islam). However, it's always been an essential part of the western experience, which we often attribute to the Enlightenment or the Renaissance but maybe it truly goes back to that moment when Jesus drew a distinction between the worlds of Caesar and God. Above, the point is made that, "God has not placed two hearts in the breast of any man." As Nasr reminds us the related commentary in the Study Quran: "That one cannot have two hearts is also understood as a reminder that a heart preoccupied with one thing is distracted from anything other than that; so a heart preoccupied with this world is separated from the next." (p. 1019) Is this why faith is often so hard in the west? There are two clearly defined worlds that on the surface seem equal, although the world of faith doesn't seem as entertaining, of course. However, I guess theoretically, the challenge of choosing between the two worlds, or even just balancing them, would make the "right" choice more meaningful.

Discography - Fall 2019

Currently we're in a Discography cycle where every few months we contribute songs and related commentaries on occasional "one offs." I don't know if anyone has the energy or time or enthusiasm for another weekly series, although I'm just beginning to hear grumblings to the contrary. While we're in the "one off" mode it makes sense that there be a theme, which we tend to only do every couple months during our regular weekly schedule. Years ago I officiated at the wedding of our dear friends Heidi and Andy. After it was over the routinely excellent Mike Kelly, one of the inexplicably and cruelly overlooked philosophers of the modern age, proposed that I had shared some truth (or maybe he was just justifying the fact that he, playing against the myth of taciturn Nebraskans, shed a few tears). This edition's theme was initially born because I found myself listening to a song (featured below) that I hadn't heard in a long while and thinking that there are some songs that are so true, so overwhelmingly real, that they are almost physically painful to hear. Of course, that truth is sometimes absolutely necessary for us to hear. So, the charge this week was to select songs that are so true, so unrelentingly true, that they are painful.

Bob Craigmile

Ryan Adams and the Cardinals, Fix It 

There are so many songs to choose from in the universe of pain.  Especially when one listens primarily to singer/songwriters of the last 20 years.  Chris Knight, Jason Isbell, James McMurtry, and Townes Van Zandt all have songs that pull out your soul and show it to you before you collapse into a heap of tears and mud.

However, I have to reckon with Mr. Ryan Adams, the Me Too poster man-child.  He is likely a classic narcissist if not a sociopath.  I'll let you dig for the truth there on your own.

Thought it leads me to wonder, how can such a bad person express pain so well in a song?  Has he been hurt so much that it's made him into a colossal jerk? Is he singing about what he's done to others?  That would require empathy though, which may not be his strong suit.

Like most great songs this one allows me to see myself in it and feel more deeply what I feel, by way of projection if nothing else.  I stumbled into RA shortly after my divorce and did a deep dive into his material for years.  

"What makes them walk away, after all these years? "

Yes, god yes.  The question one asks most frequently after a divorce. What made them walk away?  What made me let it happen?  What happened? Even when you know the answers, you ask over and over again.

"But it feels like losing when someone you love throws you away " 

Let me wallow in my self pity!  No one else cares or wants to know.  You can't explain it to them anyway because you're not done with it or even sure what it is.

"How easy was it for you making those plans you made? "

Another question you ask over and over on those long nights.  Again, you know the answer: it probably wasn't easy.  You want it to be easy though, that way they are the bad person and you are safe in your self-judgment of innocence.  

You're not innocent.

"Look what I did to you
Look what you did to me
Fixed it "

Of course, afterward, nothing is fixed.   You're broken.  The world is broken.  You're bitter and alone. Let me be!  After I moved out of our house, I called my apartment "Superman's Fortress of Despair".  It was a nice joke and I suppose a sign that I could make light of the trauma.

What really sucks about this song is that it's pretty catchy.  The guitar work is great!  If you focus on just the guitars in your headphones, it's quite nice.  

Anyway.  Time and Lexapro heal all wounds.  I've let it go mostly.  I couldn't stay angry and depressed, even though I nursed both carefully in a 130 page google document over 7 years.  Now it's done and we can get together with the kids and I don't sulk and pout and leave early.

I fixed it.

Full lyrics:

What makes them walk away, after all these years?
These years of learning and the hard way by the lessons from the tears
I know it's not a game
But it feels like losing when someone you love throws you away

I'd fix it
I'd fix it
I'd fix it
I'd fix it if I could
And I'd always win
I'd always win
So you can always win the in end

How easy was it for you making those plans you made?
Before I became someone for you you know to try to dislocate
Oh, I know it's not a game
But it feels like losing when someone you love throws you away

I'd fix it
I'd fix it
I'd fix it
I'd fix it if I could
And I'd always win
I'd always win
And you would always lose

Look what I did to you
Look what you did to me
Fixed it
I'd fix it, I'd fix it if I could
And I'd always win
And I'd always win
I'd always win in the end

Alice Neiley

As usual, I had the hardest time choosing a tune. This is mainly because my itunes library and CD collection are overwhelmed with songs that are quite raw and often tinged with various types of sadness and/or nostalgia (aside from my 'Don't H8 Me BeCuz I'm Post-2000 Pop" playlist), artists like Patty Griffin, Lucinda Williams, I'm With Her, Darlingside, Joni Mitchell, all jazz standards...

Anyway, I kept coming back to Sodheim. Almost all of his songs are truth telling, but I've always been especially drawn to "Not While I'm Around" from (oddly enough) the musical Sweeney Todd.

I first heard it my senior year of high school. I was on the 'path' to a performing arts college (I eventually changed directions), and one of my peers sang it in a vocal workshop. At that point in my life I fell in love with the lyrics because of their earnestness, but also because I SO wanted a world where something or someone could protect me from uncertainty, and where the protection itself would be always and for sure, and I'd never have to wonder who I was or whether I belonged. I think at that time I was also beginning to realize that world does not exist, which made the song extra powerful. The song spoke the truth I most wanted, and sometimes still want, which ultimately represents the truth of my fears, insecurities, and how fiercely I love, as I've always tried to make sure nothing threatens my heart (been loosening that grip over the years, though!). 

I think, at the deepest level, most people wish for what the lyrics of this song provide--simplicity, certainty--even if they've moved past childhood fears or desires. Especially in our country's current situation, demons are definitely 'prowling everywhere', and who doesn't want to 'send them howling'? But that isn't possible for just one person, nor is it possible for demons, internal or external, to disappear permanently. There is uncertainty all over (dammit), and our best bet may be to  'live the questions' as Rilke says, with the help of our connections with each other, for as long as we have them. 

Also (is this too morbid?), my most recent journey back into this song was singing what I remembered of it to my grandmother in hospice the day before she died, thinking it said perfectly what I wanted to say to her, only to realize it even more perfectly described her role in my whole life. She loved Sondheim. Like, LOVED.   

In short, these lyrics are painfully true because they represent such an unattainable dream, while at the same time the completely attainable love that can develop among us. And the melody, I mean...come on...ESPECIALLY sung by Judy Collins. Whew. 

Dave Kelley

I am sorry that I somehow missed the original email about this one off discography week.  For my selection I will choose "I Can't Make You Love Me" by Bonnie Raitt.  I have no problem listening to this great song if I am in a good relationship.  (Fortunately that is my current state, but it is certainly not my typical one.)  However, when I care about someone who no longer, or never, cared about me, I avoid this tune like the plague.  I am a slow moving man.  A long ago girlfriend complained that I go slowly even when I am in a hurry.  However, I can move at the speed of light to change channels when Trump or one of his minions appear on screen.  I move almost as quickly to change the dial when I hear this song come on the radio at the wrong time.

Gary Scudder

Joan Baez, Diamonds & Rust

Actually, I'm not that big of a Joan Baez fan. I find her voice a bit wobbly, and, yes, I know the irony of a Neil Young fan commenting upon the weakness of a singer's voice. I guess Baez falls into the category of folks that I love the idea of more than their reality:Robert Altman, Igor Stravinsky, etc. I think I actually owned the album of the same name once, which I'm sure I purchased because she covers a Jackson Browne song on it when I was in a big Browne phase. This is one of several songs that Baez wrote reflecting upon the end of her romance with Bob Dylan.  Obviously, we've all been there, when the "ghost" of a former loves arrives unbidden:

"And here I sit
Hand on the telephone
Hearing a voice I'd known
A couple of light years ago
Heading straight for a fall"

Clearly, she still loves him as she paints a picture of one of countless moments  they shared:

"Speaking strictly for me
We both could have died then and there."

However, the lingering pain in her words and voice is tangible:

"Now you're telling me
You're not nostalgic
Then give me another word for it
You who are so good with words
And at keeping things vague
'Cause I need some of that vagueness now
It's all come too clearly
Yes, I loved you dearly
And if you're offering me diamonds and rust
I've already paid."

There are women I've loved, some quite deeply and intensely, and it would hurt to see them again, but I don't know if I would respond to any of them the way Baez responds to Dylan here. Sadly, I fear there are some women who would have that response to seeing me, and the role that I played in justifying that response is another painful truth.

What It Means - Day 179

" . . . truly man is ungrateful to his Lord, and truly he is a witness to that, and truly he is fierce in his love for good things . . ."
Quran 100:6-8

Lately I seem to be pulling out material from surahs that I've never discussed before, in this case al-Adiyat, the 100th surah, here rendered as "The Chargers." In this case, because al-Adiyat is so close to the end of the Quran it means that it is a very short surah, so this may be our only visit. This is another of the innumerable reminders in the Quran of humankind's fascination with the fleeting affairs of this world as compared to the less tangible but more eternal world of the divine. Doubtless I could go through every religion in the world and come up with similar admonitions. An obvious example would be how the Hindus discuss maya, the illusion of this world that distracts us from the greater spiritual reality. Of course, Plato is makes a very similar point in regards to the impermanence and ethereal intangibility of this world as compared to the world of forms. I read an article the other day about Muslims leaving Islam, and I found myself thinking that the piece served, on one level, as anti-Islamic clickbait material because the article should have instead focused on people across the religious spectrum leaving organized religion. It could well be because of the well-documented institutional crimes of every one of them or that they simply don't "matter" in the same way in today's world or their inability to speak to today's people. I wonder if it's something as simple as our collective lack of patience and inability to conceive of a bigger world. Before class every day I see my students glued to their phones, and increasingly every year we have more and more students come in who can barely make eye contact (it's often painful to witness). Our we so addicted to immediate response (and entertainment) that it's increasingly impossible to think of another world beyond this one - or this screen. One of the reasons why I began the Proust blog project a couple years ago was to force myself to slow my mind down, to step away from my phone and social media and live more on this moment. If you can't even live in this moment, how can you wrap your brain around the much bigger question of a world beyond our immediate perception?

What It Means - Day 178

"So whosoever does a mote's weight of good shall see it. And whosoever does a mote's weight of evil shall see it."
Quran 99:7-8

This passage is drawn from the 99th surah, al-Zalzalah, here rendered as "The Earthquake." It's another of the innumerable reminders inside the Quran of the value of small kindnesses, which, to me, is at the heart of our lives as Muslims. Again, as I often opine, follow the admonition to return the worse with the better. In a more general sense, it's a reminder to live a purposeful life, being constantly mindful of the people in our lives and the world we live in, and the impact of our decisions.

As Nasr informs the reader in the corresponding commentary from the Study Quran, quoting Muqatil ibn Sulayman, "And so God revealed these two verses, encouraging people to perform small acts of goodness, since they add up in the end, and cautioning them against even small sins, since they add up in the end."

Fantasy Football Maven

Here's a picture I snapped the other night of my dear friend Cyndi as she drafted her second fantasy football team of the season. It's a great testament to our friendship that she joined both of them because she's my friend, and also because she's crazy competitive (and likes it more than she lets on). In this particular instance one of our favorite students, Liza, decided on the fly to form a league and Cyndi and I got caught in the jet stream. Liza asked me to send around an introduction to the other students about fantasy football, which I did, and some instantly summarily mocked for its length and specificity. It included the classic rules for fantasy football: don't draft based on your favorite team; don't draft quarterbacks in the first round; wait until your kicker until the 16th round; don't draft your defense until rounds 14 or 15; all of which the students ignored infamously (except for Ashley, who clearly paid attention and used her digital forensics skills to good measure and put together a great team). The rest of the students made, uh, inspired choices. Essentially, I might as well have put my instructions inside of my syllabus, because they would have read it as closely.

She should be happy, her team is better than mine.

What It Means - Day 177

"Bear patiently that which they say, and remember Our servant David, possessed of might; truly he turned oft [unto God]."
Quran 38:17

Here is another passage drawn from Sad, the 38th surah. As we discussed yesterday, this is one of the 29 surahs that start with separated letters, in this case the letter sad, which gives its name to the surah.

As Nasr tells us in the Study Quran, "The injunction to bear patiently in the face of insults from the disbelievers (cf. 20:130; 50:39; 73:10) is addressed to the Prophet, but can also be understood as counsel for all believers. It can also be understood to convey an attitude of tolerance and forbearance that should prevail whenever circumstances permit . . ." (p. 1104)

As I've said in the past, one of the factors that drew me to Islam in the first place is its emphasis on patience, but also it's emphasis on tolerance. There are two many folks outside of the faith, and, sadly, inside of the faith, who have lost sight of that notion. There are some who argue that this specific Quranic injunction was abrogated by later, in the chronological order, revelations that empower Muslims to respond more forcefully in the face of oppression. I've made abundantly clear what I think of the whole abrogation argument so we don't need to go into that again; suffice it to say that when you're viewing the entire Quran, and not simply cherry-picking certain passages, it's hard to not understand the consistent call for toleration and understanding and, yes, patience, even with those who disagree with you and your faith.

What It Means - Day 176

"Truly, We purified them with that which is pure - remembrance of the Abode."
Quran 38:46

This brief passage, which will be part of my way too brief commentary today, is drawn from the 38th surah, Sad. We've talked before about the fact that 29 of the 114 surahs in the Quran start with separated letters, and this one starts with the letter sad which provides the surah's name. There's a cottage industry associated with proposing theories about what these separated letters mean, but in the end it's accepted that it's a mystery known only to God. This passage is one of those lovely, and utterly necessary, reminders to live your life in a conscious, deliberate fashion. Part of it, certainly, is to think about God and the divine and the end of all things, and one of the advantages of praying five times a day is that it provides a very structured mechanism for doing just that. Moreover, and as I've stated way too many times, I believe that the best way to worship God is to live your life in a manner in which you are constantly mindful of the people around you and what they are feeling and what they need, and trying to make their lives better. That constant mindfulness is both a result of a heart's purity, but also a generator of their purity.

What It Means - Day 175

"We bestowed Wisdom on Luqman. 'Show gratitude to Allah.' Any who is grateful does so to the profit of his own soul, but if any is ungrateful, verily Allah is free of all wants, Worthy of all praise."
Quran 31:12

Here is a passage from the 31st surah, Luqman, from which I'll be drawing a lot later for a very lengthy discussion. I'll save a lot of background information on Luqman for that more lengthy blog post. I suppose, technically, if the Quran is truly the word of God that it seems somewhat inappropriate to say that you have favorite surahs or passages, but Luqman is clearly one of my favorites nonetheless. When people find out that your Muslim that get fixated on many things, and one of them is the notion of praying five times a day. As I've said, I've been honest in admitting that it's rare that I actually do pray five times a day, which reflects poorly on me. People will ask: what do you possibly have to say to God five times a day? That's a whole issue in and of itself, obviously. The prayers, as we've discussed earlier, are very structured and formulaic, but there is obviously more "personal" time. I think off every one the same way: showing gratitude for the many gifts that I have, the innumerable friends and loved ones who make my life better, my health (such as it is), my extraordinary son. Even if there were no God, the notion of stopping five times a day to quietly meditate upon life and the blessings inside of that life seems to me essential. I find that I also always approach life outside of the religious realm in the same fashion. I've talked repeatedly about how I try and focus on the concept of returning the worse with the better, and I would argue that showing gratitude to everyone in our lives, even if they only pass through in the most transitory fashion, is essential to living a good life. Or, as the Prophet reminded us in another hadith, "Be easy. Do not be difficult."

What It Means - Day 174

"God desires to make [this] clear unto you, and to guide you to the traditions of those who went before you, and to relent unto you. And God is Knowing, Wise. God desires to relent unto you, and those who follow lusts desire that you to tremendously astray. God desires to lighten [your burden] for you, for man was created weak"
Quran 4:26-28

Here's another passage from the 4th surah, al-Nisa, "The Women." Most directly this is a revelation in regards to rules relating to marriages, and a loosening of them. However, in a larger context, this follows up on yesterday's passage and blog post about mercy and forgiveness. I've always found the line, "God desires to lighten [your burden] for you, for man was created weak," to be fascinating. On the one hand you might sardonically point out that God is owning a mistake: "Yeah, sorry, that's on me. It was a busy weak and I was distracted, and, well, it just didn't come together like I was hoping. Again, sorry." However, it's hard to imagine an all-knowing, all-powerful God somehow clumsily and unintentionally putting out a faulty product. So, if humans were intentionally created "weak," why? Now, of course, if you don't believe in God, and religion is just a humanly fabricated belief system designed to explain things, then this passage provides the "out" we all need to our consistent frailty and moral failures. But that doesn't explain why in a religious worldview based on the existence of God that humans would be created weak. Unless we come back to the notion, which we've discussed before, about the freedom that humans were given, including the freedom to not believe. Similarly, if humans are so susceptible to temptation then then they are also, I would add, oddly positioned to avoid that temptation, to overcome their own nature. This reminds me of a conversation that I had with a Muslim friend when I was teaching in the UAE, long before I converted, when he pointed out that it was stupid that all (well, most) the restaurants were closed during Ramadan. His point was that the key to Ramadan was fasting, and the mental discipline to fast, not making the process of fasting easy. If it was easy then it meant nothing.

What It Means - Day 173

"Whosoever does evil or wrongs himself, and then seeks forgiveness of God, he will find God Forgiving, Merciful."
Quran 4:110

Here is another passage from al-Nisa, usually rendered "Women," the lengthy and very important 4th surah. I suppose all religions have similar messages of hope and forgiveness, and, if they didn't, what would be their point? However, I still felt moved to include this passage because there is still this popular perception that Islam is a terribly angry and vindictive faith. Instead, in Islam God is consider to be so essentially forgiving and merciful that he is Forgiving and Merciful, meaning that these are such fundamental concepts that they cannot be separated from the divine. Why would we worship, and for that matter even perceive, of a god and cruelly judged everyone of our actions? Yes, in the end what you say and do and think matter, and they matter because they impact the rest of the planet and its inhabitants, but does that equate with god moving a divine abacus back and forth in reply to every thing we do? As I've pointed out many times I associate God with the quiet stillness, the undeniable beauty, the inherent kindness and compassion, that is at the heart of all things, and forgiveness and mercy both reflect that essence but would also act as a magnet for those who practice those attributes.

What It Means - Day 172

"As for those who believe, and those who are Jews, the Sabeans, the Christians, the Magians, and the idolaters, indeed God will judge between them on the Day of Resurrection. Truly God is Witness over all things."
Quran 22:17

After pointing out yesterday that I had never drawn anything from al-Hajj, the 22nd surah, obviously rendered as "The Pilgrimage," here is the second straight day with a passage from it. This is similar to a couple other Quranic passages that reference the Jews and Christians and Sabeans, and speaks to different paths to God, as long as a follower believes and performs righteous deeds. What's interesting about this one is that we have a reference to Magians, which would specifically apply to a priestly class from ancient Persia and more generally apply, at least from an Arab view, apply to Zoroastrians. If you're Christian would would undoubtedly have made the association with the Magi who visited the baby Jesus in Matthew's account. So, we're adding Zoroastrians to the more grouping of Jews, Christians and Sabeans (we've talked before about the argument about who, exactly, were the Sabeans). Sadly, there has been, and continues to be, tension between the Arab and Persian/Iranian worlds, and this shows up in the Persian epic the Shahnameh, but also in some of the stories in extra-Quranic literature. It has been argued by some that Zoroastrianism may actually be the oldest monotheistic religion in the world, or at least a competitor with Judaism for that title, and it was a popular presence during Jesus's time and certainly influenced early Christian thought. As Nasr tells us, "During Islamic history, many jurists (such as al-Shafi'i) accepted Zoroastrians as People of the Book, as we also see very generally in Persia and among Muslims of the Indian subcontinent." (p. 834) So, this provides an interesting glimpse into the dynamic between Arabia/Persia and Islam/Zoroastrianism, but to me the most important thing is the reference once again to different paths to God, and not simply an emphasis on Islam alone as the sole path.

What It Means - Day 171

"And among mankind some worship God upon a brink; if good befalls him, he is content thereby, but if a trial befalls him, he is turned over upon his face, losing this world the Hereafter. That is the manifest loss."
Quran 22:11

Here is a passage drawn from al-Hajj, not surprisingly rendered as "The Pilgrimage," which is the 22nd surah. I'm pretty certain this is the first time I've drawn anything out of this surah. Doubtless all religions have similar passages or sayings to this warning against only remembering your god when things have taken a turn for the worse. I think I'm so concerned about this that I seemingly never "ask" God for anything during prayer. Mainly it ends up being a litany of thanks, as I tend to view prayer as a time for personal reflection and meditation, and devoting time to appreciating what I have. Plus, as my great friend Dave points out, God is not an ATM. Not only should God exist solely to wait around in case you need anything, but also the notion than an omniscient God took Her/His/Their eye of the ball and had to be reminded what's happening. I think you remember God all the time because, at least to me, you worship God when you're kind to those around you, so if you're doing that on a consistent basis you're already remembering and worshiping God.

What It Means - Day 170

"By the declining day, truly mankind is in loss, save those who believe, perform righteous deeds, exhort one another to truth, and exhort one another to patience."
Quran 103:1-3

This is the entire 103rd surah, al-Asr, here rendered as "The Declining Day." When interested non-Muslims ask me what surahs they should read I often direct them first to surah 18, Maryam (Mary), because it includes characters, notably Mary and Jesus, that they would recognize and would probably be surprised to find in Islam, but also because it includes many important themes of Islam. Or, I might direct them to the following surah, the 19th, al-Kahf, "The Cave," because it is utterly fascinating and includes brilliant metaphors, which help people understand that Islam is not the intellectually dry, literal faith that it is sometimes described as. And I always send them off to read this surah, one of the shortest in the entire Quran. It's my favorite surah, and one that finds it's way into my prayers constantly. It was the first surah where the obvious pairing of belief and righteous deeds first jumped out at me, and launched me to counting the number of times that they are paired in the Quran (over fifty), and that shaped my perception of what the faith means. Plus, in a very simple way, it explains what, at least to me, the faith is about. As Nasr tells us in the Study Quran, "From one perspective, these three short verses contain the entire meaning of the Quran." He then quotes the scholar al-Shafi'i who opined, "Were the people to ponder this surah, it would suffice them."

What It Means - Day 169

"Indeed, he prospers who purifies it. And indeed he fails who obscures it."
Quran 91:9-10

This brief passage is drawn from the 91st surah, al-Shams, here rendered as "The Sun." The "it" referenced here is, not surprisingly, the soul. In the related commentary from the Study Quran Nasr tells us, "Nonetheless, there is a subtle reciprocity in every step one takes toward God, for as 13:11 proclaims: Truly God alters not what is in a people until they alter what is in themselves. The literal meaning of purify (zakka) is 'to grow,' and according to most the literal meaning of obscure (dassa) is 'to bury.' These verses could thus be translated, 'He prospers who grows it, and he fails who buries it.'" In turn, this also reminds me of the famous line from the Sufi poet Rumi, "Everyone sees the Unseen in proportion to the clarity of their heart, and that depends upon how much has has polished it." (Nasr p. 1489) And this builds upon a hadith from the Prophet: "For everything there is a polish, and the polish for the heart is the remembrance of God." To me this all means that faith is a reflective process, but also an intensely active process. Essentially, you have to work at it. But, can you work at it so hard that the very effort is distracting? In Hinduism followers are warned against distracting passions and desires, and one of them is the desire for enlightenment. In Buddhism you find the term satori, or sudden enlightenment, which means, on one level, that you can work and work at finding enlightenment, but it's also likely to happen quietly and unexpectedly. A friend of mine is on a spiritual quest and all it seems to bring her is unhappiness. Yesterday she spent over an hour yesterday complaining about her religion of choice and asking how one is supposed to know the meaning of life.  I think she's running so fast that she can't see the beauty of the quest and the world around her. I think the purity of the soul, or the clarity of the heart, have absolutely nothing to do with the outward trappings of religion, and everything to do with the quiet place inside all of us (maybe Marcus Aurelius's "peace of green fields").

What It Means - Day 168

"They took their oaths as a shield and thus turned from the way of God; so theirs shall be a humiliating punishment."
Quran 58:16

This passage, drawn from surah 58, al-Mujadilah, here rendered as "She Who Disputes," reminds me of one of my favorite proposals: that you should treat your faith as a guidepost and not a shield. I guess I'm thinking about this in the light of yet another mass murder here in the glorified shooting gallery that passes for a country, in this case the horrific events in Odessa, Texas. I found myself trolling a Texas representative on Twitter after he would never support any infringement upon his god given right to bear arms. While I don't know if I have many trigger issues, this defense of gun ownership is rapidly rising to the level of one. I found myself Tweeting in response: "I would not claim to be in on God's decision making process, but I'm pretty certain it didn't include assigning individuals the right to own assault rifles. This was a decision made by humans, and it can, and should, be amended by humans. #GunControl" Leaving beside my to be expected painfully left-wing call for greater gun control for the moment, what really bothered me was his reference to his God given right to bear arms. Seriously, WTF? Beyond the arrogance of thinking that you speak for God - and the extraordinary hypocrisy of using God to justify your politica (and doubtless NRA-funded financial) position - he's also clearly using his religion as a shield. We've so normalized this phrase that no one even flinches anymore when people say it.

What It Means - Day 167

"And indeed We have made the Quran easy to remember; so is there any who remembers?"
Quran 54:22

This passage, drawn from al-Qamar, the 54th surah, here rendered as "The Moon," brings together a couple themes that have been running through my commentary lately. Muslims will sometimes propose that while Islam is not necessarily an easy faith to faith, it's an easy faith to understand. I think I would definitely agree on both fronts. In many ways I am a very simple man (I'm from Indiana, after all) and the more I study the Quran and the ahadith the more I think the faith is simple, at least in regards to what really matters: there are enough trappings of the faith to keep your busy for a lifetime, but the essentials of how you're supposed to treat others is more manageable. The notion that the Quran, and the faith, are easy to understand is presented as a gift from God, but here you also have the lament that even considering this fact/gift few people actually remember it.

And this is where it ties more directly to a point I was making about our emphasis on memorizing as compared to studying/analyzing/understanding the faith. In the related commentary in the Study Quran Nasr quotes a famous hadith: "The best among you are those who learn the Quran and teach it to others." My father, is is early attempt to try and convince me to be a physician (or, as he would opine when comparing that choice to the one I made, "a serious doctor"), would quote the famous line from the medical field: see one, do one, teach one. It may be true for aspiring doctors and nurses, but I would argue it's also true in regards to faith. When we're simply memorizing something are we truly learning it? The final point of the old medical school bromide, "teach one," implies that if you know a procedure well enough to actually teach it then you truly know it. However, to get to that point you have to have passed through "see one" and "do one." If we place such tremendous emphasis on memorizing the Quran, but also sometimes discourage the more difficult discussions associated with the Quran and faith, are we insuring that we never get past the "see one" phase? That's not what I think our faith should be about. There has been a centuries long history of arguing and debating about the different possible interpretations of Quranic passages, as much as the Wahhabis might try and squelch that practice, and the concept of kalam, or speculative theology was, and still should be, an essential part of Islam. Moreover, isn't this what the Prophet was saying in, "The best among you are those who learn the Quran and teach it to others"? You can't teach it unless you truly know it, and that means living it and experimenting with it. That said, in the preparatory words before every Friday prayer we're warned that all innovations lead to the hellfire. While an innovation that leads leads to polytheism would, by definition be bad, can we also take that admonition too generally and too definitively and shut down all reflection?