Wednesday, May 8, 2019

What It Means - Day 51

So here we are, early morning of the third day of Ramadan.  Instead of commenting (poorly) on some aspect of the faith, I thought I'd just share a few reflections on this year's Ramadan. As we discussed the other day, I'm getting up at 4:00 every morning and trying to throw as much food into my system as possible. Now, truthfully, that's an hour later than I should be getting up (I was talking to my friend Aziz yesterday and he's getting up at the more appropriate 3:00 a.m.). I try and eat some fruit and some protein and as much liquid as I can handle.  Usually I buy these containers of pre-sliced fruit from Shaw's and eat half of one each morning.  The first two days I ate an entire package each day, and then I read the label and realized that each contains a pound and a half of fruit; and then I remember, oh, yeah, I only ate half of one each morning last year. I'm back to the more sensible half a container this morning.  I've become a fan of Jimmy Dean's Delights turkey sausage bowls: egg whites, potatoes and turkey sausage; allegedly healthier and within walking distance of halal (although, truthfully, I don't pay that much attention to halal). And then I throw in a couple pieces of toast.  I'm really not that hungry at 4:00 in the morning, but I know it's going to be a long day if I don't get something in my system. It's the same thing with liquids: two cups of coffee, a large glass of orange juice, and then 2-3 large glasses of water. Even getting a late start that still adds up to fifteen and a half hour of fasting, and we always ends up needing/missing water the most.  After that it's time for ablutions and then the morning prayer.

As I was discussing the other day, what's most enjoyable to me, and what I would argue is by far the most important thing, is the time you can carve off for study. So, for instance, on Monday I had the last fourteen surahs of the Quran, along with commentary.  They are very short, so it's not as impressive as it sounds.  That said, I devote a lot of time to re-reading the extensive commentary in Nasr's the Study Quran to try and add as much context as possible. I'm not a fan of simply memorizing passages and rules, and it seems to me that if you're not reading and questioning and struggling with the complexities then you're not exercising your faith. I also find myself reading and studying my own scrawled notes in the margins of the Study Quran, waiting for me like the Ghost of Ramadans Past. I then read three early chapters in Martin Ling's Muhammad, which is a very good biography of the Prophet. I'm very fortunate in that in my line of work it's easy to carve off big chunks of the day for reading and studying, and I'm always mindful of that gift. Monday was an off-day after handing in grades so that an easy day to organize. Yesterday I had meetings from 9:00 until mid-afternoon, so that was more difficult to work around. One of the advantages of getting up at 4:00 is that you can hit the gym when it first opens at 5:30 and it doesn't even particularly early.

Fasting is not a lot of fun, but it's physically not as horrible as I thought it would be.  Like I said a couple days ago, mainly it's lonely and tiring. I met one of my graduating seniors yesterday for coffee late afternoon and it didn't bother me a bit to watch her drinking a cup of coffee in front of me.  It brought me back to my time in Abu Dhabi when the question of what restaurant should or should not be open was a big question. The biggest part of fasting is not the fasting, but rather the decision to fast; making it too easy sort of defeats the purpose. It's hard to get ahead of the exhaustion, mainly because you can't make up the hours. If you can't begin to think about eating until after 8:00 and you have to get up at 4:00, then you know you're not going to get eight hours sleep (which I've never needed, so I guess I'm lucky on that front).  But here's the thing, it's so much worse for folks who are more devout.  They're both getting up earlier, and they're doubtless staying at the mosque later for the final prayer of the day and the reading of the Quran during Ramadan. And most of them don't have a job wherein they can just close their office door and grab a nap. What they're accomplishing day in and day out during Ramadan is extraordinary. I was just talking to one of my students last night about how Ramadan is still often considered this odd little thing that a few lunatics practice (my school is laughably clumsy in its handling of it), when in fact a quarter of the planet is fasting right now. And every one of them is doing a better job than I am.

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